


Never Let Me Go

by crazyCMfan



Category: The Good Fight (TV), The Good Wife (TV)
Genre: Angst, Crime, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I'm sorry for putting her through this, Kalinda and Diane are best friends deal with it, Kalinda will hurt anyone who tries to hurt her family, Lockner, Minor Character Death, Original Character(s), Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Romance, Will is Diane's tower of strength
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:28:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 69,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25101679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazyCMfan/pseuds/crazyCMfan
Summary: When the unthinkable happens, it leaves Diane’s life in a pile of fragments she somehow has to put back together. Not knowing if she can get through this, she finds the strength in her friends, who do everything to help her. And there is the man who loves her with all his heart and would give his life for her. Will/Diane. Warning! Contains rape, please take the rating seriously!
Relationships: Will Gardner/Diane Lockhart
Comments: 75
Kudos: 112





	1. Chapter 1

_Looking up from underneath_

_Fractured moonlight on the sea_

_Reflections still look the same to me_

_As before I went under._

_And it's peaceful in the deep_

_Cathedral where you cannot breathe_

_No need to pray, no need to speak_

_Now I am under all._

_And the arms of the ocean are carrying me_

_And all this devotion was rushing out of me_

_And the crashes are heaven, for a sinner like me_

_But the arms of the ocean delivered me_

_\- Never Let Me Go by Florence + the Machine -_

_She was always a person to be in control, always, because she hated not being in control more than anything else. It could cause pain so quickly, and often there was no one to blame but oneself. Not being in control had changed her life drastically in the last hours. Not being in control caused her to lie here on the floor, unable to move one muscle but gruesomely still feeling pain, the blood, the tears, and everything else on her skin. Why had this happened? Was she to blame for this? That's what she had thought about, what had she done to deserve this?_

* * *

"Hey, I'm heading home now, what about you?" Diane looked up from her paperwork to see him standing in the doorway to her office, his coat already on. Her eyes took in the office behind him, they were actually the last ones. Most of the lights were turned off. In fact, the only lights left on were in her office and the hallways.

"When I'm finished with this," she answered with a smile, and Will shook his head.

"Don't work yourself to death Diane, you don't need to be always the last to leave the office. It makes me look lazy," he said, causing Diane to chuckle.

"Well then start working harder and concentrate less on those bed warmers of yours." she couldn't help but tease him. She never understood why he settled for such bimbos when he deserved so much more, he was a good man, and many women would be happy to be with him.

"Touché. Before I forget, we have another meeting with the Trustee the day after tomorrow."

"Like I need a reminder of this."

"Do you want a ride home?" Will asked, and Diane seriously thought about accepting his offer but knew she had to get this done, or she would regret it in the morning when she added it to the growing tower of paperwork.

"I'd like to say yes, but I have to finish this. Maybe tomorrow," Diane said with a smile, and Will returned it.

"Alright, good night, Diane, see you tomorrow," he said and waved at her with his free hand.

"Good night Will."

Diane continued to work for nearly an hour before deciding she had made enough progress for tonight and just wanted to head home and go to bed. Her excellent, comfortable, and empty bed. It had been a while since she seriously shared that bed with a man, for a short while she had hoped Kurt McVeigh might be the one to fill that role, but it had been ill-advised from the beginning. There were just too many differences that would stand between them, and not just small ones, either, the big kind that would cause more trouble the longer you tried to ignore them.

Well, right now, she wasn't looking for a relationship anyway. There was too much going on at their firm for her to have time for romance, and it also had it's perks to just have to look after oneself, with nobody there, there was no need to explain, to apologize and make up for the lost time. She preferred to be single and concentrate on her work, and Diane had always been a person that was comfortable with being alone for a while. She could entertain herself just fine with a good book, some good music, and some good food and wine. Diane got up, gathered her things, and put on her coat before heading home.

When Diane unlocked the door to her apartment, she had barely made two steps inside, a muscular arm wrapped around her, a gloved hand pressed on her mouth, and she felt a sharp sting of pain in her neck. Diane screamed for help, but everything was muffled by the hand, at the same time she hit, kicked and thrashed around, did her best to fight the person off, fought for her life as fear and panic rose in her.

"Oh yes, fight all you want Darling, I like fighting, but in a minute you won't be so feisty anymore." a cold voice said in her ear as the man forced her further inside and kicked the door shut. Diane tried her best to reach something, anything, of him, to fight him off or to get some evidence. But as she attempted this while being dragged around her entrance hall, she felt a tingle in her fingers. What the hell was that? That was when Diane saw the syringe on the floor, he had injected her something! What had it been? What was happening to her?

Diane screamed louder, so loud she thought her lungs might explode, she tried to turn in his arms, to get another angle to fight him off better, but it was in vain, his arms were wrapped around her too tightly, she was pressed against him unable to free herself.

In their struggle, she stepped on the syringe and felt it brake under her shoe, at least now they could get a sample of what had been inside. The tingle she had felt in her fingertips rapidly spread out and left a numbness behind she also felt the same in her toes and legs, she was beginning to lose feeling in arms and legs!

'Fuck, what the hell did he want?! Was he send from an angry client or rival firm? Why was he doing this? What would he do to her?' With each second, she lost more and more feeling in her arms and legs as he dragged her through her apartment and then entered her home office. He slammed her down on her desk, and that was when she saw her last chance. Her phone had slid from her pocket and landed on her desk! With her heart pounding in her chest, she gathered the last bit of strength and will she had and kicked her legs at him to distract his attention from her right hand.

Blindly she called the only person she had on speed dial and the person she trusted the most. Will. 'Please, if there ever was a god, then Will has to pick up.'

"Oh, sorry darling, but this will stay between us," he said and turned her on her back he punched her and Diane almost lost consciousness. The man pinned her to the desk with his weight and took one glove off to force it in her mouth before his bare hand pressed on her mouth again. To her horror, he put the phone to her ear while covering the microphone with his thump. Only a second later, Will picked up.

"Hey, Diane, what is it?" She struggled again, but it was still useless.

"Diane? Diane, are you there?" Only then, when she heard his tired but cheerful voice calling her name, while this man had her paralyzed and pinned to her own desk, caused tears to well in her eyes.

"Diane? Hello?" Will asked, and the tears spilled down her face, she looked up and saw dark soulless eyes staring down at her through the mask. She had lost almost all the feeling in her extremities now.

"Well, thanks for the butt dial Diane. See you tomorrow." and with that, he hung up. This time, only a frightened wail left her mouth as her last chance of getting help was gone.

"Sorry, Diane, he doesn't have time right now. But I promise you, we'll have so much fun together." then his hand finally left her mouth and pulled the glove with it, but before she could say anything, he had grabbed her blouse and ripped it apart.

"Don't…!" was everything Diane could say. It was like her body didn't belong to her anymore; she couldn't move any more! She couldn't fight, she was forced to simply endure this.

"Please...no." she hated how faint and weak her voice sounded, she wanted to tell him to go to hell, that he was one pathetic son of a bitch, and that she would make him pay for everything.

"You're already begging now?" he said with a chuckle and groped her breasts painfully, "I expected more of the great Diane Lockhart." with that, he grabbed her chin hard before he pressed his unclothed mouth to hers. She nearly gagged when his tongue invaded her mouth, and she couldn't do anything! Not even bite him! That was about the worst part that she was unable to fight him like she would do if he hadn't done to her what he had.

He finally let go of her, and for a second, she was relieved, that was until he pulled her coat off and threw it away. A second later, she felt the cold metal of a pair of scissors against her skin, which he used to cut her bra off. Shame spread through her body as she laid under his gaze, fearing what he would do or how far he would go. He groped her again, twisting her nipples painfully until a whimper escaped her, he chuckled and leaned close once more.

"You like that, don't you? Just tell me to stop...but if you want more, just do nothing." she tried to do or say anything, but nothing happened apart from a few painful groaning and whimpering noises she couldn't form words anymore, so she glared at him, send him to hell for this.

"I always wanted to do this, ever since I first saw you I would dream of this." Next, his hands ran under her skirt, pulled her pantyhose, and slip down her legs before pushing her skirt up. His face hovered over hers, and the soulless eyes watched her closely as he traced her womanhood with his fingers, before suddenly plunging them inside her.

It hurt so much, why was she still feeling pain? This was torture, feeling everything while not being able to move or say anything, why couldn't he just knock her out? Diane didn't want to feel, see or hear any of this, anything was better than this, she silently begged to lose consciousness, no matter how.

He pulled his hand back, but before she could even form a thought, she felt his erect member at her entrance as he forced his way inside her, tearing her apart. He immediately set a brutal pace so that not only tears of shame, fear, and despair but also tears of pain were running down her face. Diane thought she might be sick, but there was nothing there to throw up.

"You like this, don't you? Yes you like this, I know you do Diane," he groaned in her ear as he continued his assault, "You can't get enough of me, you love it...good lord you feel so good Darling." he panted in her ear, she could smell his sweat and some cheap cologne that only added to her nausea. She would never forget this, the smell had etched itself in her memory, to come back and taunt her in the future if she survived this.

"You'll never forget this baby, never, I swear." Why couldn't he shut up? Wasn't this bad enough, did he really have to talk to her as he raped her? Talk to her like he was her lover? Like this was some adventurous, romantic date? Still, Diane did her best to not listen to him, to blend him out, she tried her best to get her mind to leave her useless body he was using.

She was at a beach, a beautiful deserted beach on some island, lying in the hot sun reading her favorite book and enjoying the peace. She was at the beach, she was at the beach, she was at the beach.

"Fuck baby, you make me come so early…do you want some lasting reminder? Damn, you do, don't you? You weren't fortunate to have a baby before, but maybe now it'll happen." More tears escaped her eyes at his words, and as he sped up his thrusts and then came inside her, a new pain was added. He bit down so hard, just below her right collarbone, that he drew blood, leaving a bite mark while grunting like a pig. Diane, despite the horror she just went through, felt relieved, finally it was over. Now he would leave her alone.

"God, the first time is always the best, isn't it?" he murmured as he pulled out of her only to flip her around, so she was bent over her desk, her face pressed to the cold wood.

"But I won't deny you the second round. After all, I specially prepared for this," Diane would've screamed if she could. No, no, no, not again! Anything but this! "Just give me a few moment's baby, I'll be right back." He pressed a wet kiss to her neck before he left. She was still unable to move one millimeter or say anything, she just laid on the desk.

She laid there beaten and broken, her blood and his sperm running down her legs. He had not only taken her dignity, body, and control from her, but he had also forever ruined this office for her. Diane's work was her life, she loved her job and dedicated her life to it, and now he had ruined a big part of it for her. He had destroyed her private and part of her work life in one go.

Despite his words, Diane had hoped he had left, after all satisfied with what he had done to her, after ruining her, but then she heard footsteps getting closer, and he was back.

"Did you miss me already?" he taunted her again as he let his hands run over the back of her thighs up to her ass, pressed his hips to hers so she could feel him again. Diane prayed for death. She wanted to die right then and there, because then all the pain, physical and emotional, would be gone, and that was the only thing Diane wanted, she wanted it to stop, and she wanted him to be gone.

He raped her again, and because of his recent orgasm, it took him even longer now, it felt like days, as every sense of time had left her. He took her even harder than before, causing Diane to rock back and forth on the desk with every thrust, but Diane hardly noticed it, she finally managed to leave her body behind, to zone out and let it happen. But when her tormentor saw this, he wasn't happy about it, so he did the worst thing possible.

Diane was brought back when he flipped her on her back once more and slapped her so hard he broke her skin. Then he forced her to look at him with one hand. At first, Diane didn't feel what he did with his other hand, but once she did, new tears built in her eyes, and she thought she would suffocate on her tears. He began to rub her clit and slowly brought her to an orgasm, as he hummed a jingle for cereal above her. Diane's own body had again betrayed her, he had laughed so hard as it happened, telling her for getting raped she was awfully wet, only increasing her wish to die.

Whenever Diane had tried to leave her body behind, he had hit her again until she could taste blood in her mouth and felt it run from her nose. When he finally reached his end, he came inside her at first, before he pulled out and ejaculated all over her chest.

Her tormentor kissed her once more, grabbed Diane by her hair, and threw her on the floor. He then used her hair to clean his member of his cum and her blood. Then he vanished out of her sight for a moment, when he returned, he held another syringe in his hand and injected its content in her. Then he stared at her through cold, soulless eyes.

"God, you look so beautiful, yes, this is where whores like you belong my darling, Diane. I hope we meet again sometime. I'll never forget this and I know you won't either, you'll think about me for the rest of your life, as much as you want to deny it, I am a part of you now." With that, he was finally gone.

If only she could stop breathing now. He hadn't killed her, he had only ruined her life and left her here as a pathetic mess on the floor. At that thought, yet again, new tears spilled down her cheeks. She didn't want anybody to see her like this, to even know about this. How could she ever tell anyone what he had done to her? What he had taken from her.

Finally, Diane felt her mind slip away into unconsciousness, and she couldn't remember if she had ever felt so grateful for something, just a small part of blissful nothingness until she would return to this hell.

Maybe if Diane was lucky, she wouldn't wake up again.

* * *

Hello!

Thank you all so much for the positive reaction regarding my first Will/Diane OneShot. There have been requests to write more, so here is one of my other ideas!

First of all, I'm sorry for doing this to Diane, but I somehow have to put my favorite characters through hell in at least one story.

I promise, for now, it won't get worse than that!

This is actually going to be a Will/Diane story, but obviously, it will take a while to get there! Takes place during the early fourth season.

Even though the first chapter is so dark, I still hope you like the story itself and will read it.

Please leave me some feedback in a comment


	2. Chapter 2

"Diane? Diane, are you home?" at the voice Diane's eyes snapped open, the sunlight that shone in through the windows almost blinded her. Where was she? There was a blissful second of not remembering, but then everything came rushing back, the man, the pain, the rape. 

Diane tried to move, but her arms and legs were still of no use, she only managed to move some fingers. She tried to say something, nothing, frustrated and desperate she tried to scream, scream as loud as she could, that she was here, that she needed help! But only a pathetic whimper escaped her throat, like a wounded animal. Still, it seemed to be enough.

"You heard that?" there was another voice asking, she recognized it, it was Kalinda! Diane tried again, only producing whines and whimpers. 

"Diane?" the other voice belonged to Alicia, she could hear them enter her office now. 

"What's that smell, Kalinda? Diane? Diane, are you-?," but the rest of Alicia's words were cut off by her startled cry. 

"Diane! Oh my god, Kalinda!" Then since god knows how many hours Diane saw a friend's face, Alicia's panicked and shocked face came into view, and tears of relief ran down her face. Another whimper escaped her as her own eyes locked onto the eyes of the younger woman. 

"Diane? Diane, can you hear me?" Alicia asked, and Diane blinked once, followed by a sound that was supposed to be a yes. 

"Alicia, don't move her!" Kalinda said quickly after the initial shock wore off, she was in Investigator mode. 

"What?" 

"Don't move her! And don't touch anything! I- I will take some pictures, we need every piece of evidence. I'm sorry, Diane, but I have to, Alicia, call the police and an ambulance," Kalinda said. At the same time, she quickly took pictures of Diane and the office. Insensate fury rose with every click, and she swore to herself that she would catch whoever did this even if it was the last thing she'd do. 

Kalinda liked Diane, even though they weren't friends, and she was her boss, she liked her and had a great deal of respect for the woman. So to see her like this, half-naked and beaten, dried blood and sperm between her legs and on her body, made Kalinda angry. She didn't even want to imagine what Diane had been through.

"Okay, I got everything," she said, and Alicia, who had just gotten off with the police and the ambulance, leaned down next to Diane and took her hand. 

"The ambulance is on its way, Diane, we'll get you to the hospital, everything is going to- going to be okay," Alicia felt stupid for saying that, inevitably, nothing was going to be okay for quite a while. "We'll catch whoever did this. I promise you, Diane!" 

"Can you move or talk?" Kalinda asked. "Blink once for yes, twice for no." Diane blinked twice. 

"Okay, do you know who did this to you?" again, she blinked twice. 

"When did this happen? Was it yesterday?" One blink. 

"Was he already inside?" No again. Diane tried once again to talk, she knew that whatever he had given her was slowly wearing off now, she could feel her fingers again. Diane had to tell them that Will was the last one who had seen her, that she had called him. 

"Ill..." she whimpered, gathering all her strength to move her lips, but Kalinda and Alicia shared a short, confused glance. 

"What? Your ill?" 

"No...Ill..." she saw that they still did not understand, so she tried to write the letter W on the back of Alicia's hand with her finger. 

"Ill...Ill..." it took a moment, but then sudden realization speared over the younger woman's face. 

"Will! Do you want us to call Will?" Alicia asked, and after failing to say 'Yes', she blinked once again. 

"You stay with her, I'll call Will," Kalinda said and dialed his number.

"Will? Alicia and I drove by Diane's, she-" she was tough, but at the sight of Diane, even Kalinda needed a moment. "Will you have to come to the Chicago General," it was the nearest hospital so they would take her there, "Diane was attacked, she was beaten...and raped," Kalinda told him and heard the sharp intake of breath.

"What?" Will asked, shocked, he couldn't believe what Kalinda had just said to him, Diane was attacked? Raped? He knew when he came in, and Diane wasn't in her office, and her secretary couldn't reach her that something was off, Diane was never late. 

But Will had been busy and thought that maybe she really had overslept, it happened to the best, he had thought about what he would say if she finally came to work, what would annoy her the most. But two hours later, there was still no sight of her, no call, so he sent Alicia and Kalinda to her place on their way to a client.

"Oh god, I'm on my way!" he hung up, jumped up, and grabbed his coat before running out his office. "Cancel every appointment Diane and I have!" he shouted at their assistant's, before running down the stairways to the parking garage. 

Upon ending the call with Will Kalinda searched for any evidence from the office to the front door, thinking about how it was only a coincidence that they found Diane. They had only noticed something was wrong when Alicia had tried the doorknob for fun, after unsuccessfully ringing the doorbell, not expecting the door to actually open.

What would've happened if she hadn't done that? They would have left, unknowingly leaving Diane behind when she needed help the most. Shuddering, she concentrated on finding something that could help them catch the bastard who had done this. Kalinda was about to walk back to Diane when she noticed a stain on the rug by the front door. She leaned down, inspected it, and saw tiny pieces of glass and liquid next to the rug. She then ran back inside the home office and knelt beside Alicia, looking closely at Diane's skin. 

"Diane, did he inject you with something?" at the same time as Diane blinked once the Investigator found the injection side on Diane's neck. 

"Was it the same stuff as the substance on the rug?" Diane blinked 'Yes' again, and Kalinda stood once more, hearing the ambulance in the distance. 

"I'll show them in." then she hurried out of the room. Secretly glad she could leave because she knew exactly what to do outside, knew what had to be done, Kalinda couldn't stay there and look at her Diane, she wasn't the type for that and Diane needed her help now. She would also call her friend, Elena, who worked for the CSI and was easily the best in her field in all Illinois. 

When the ambulance finally arrived, Kalinda filled them in and showed them the way inside, offered them to take a sample of the substance, which they gladly accepted. They quickly tended to Diane and then loaded her up on a gurney to take her to the hospital. Alicia would ride with them, and when they left, Kalinda handed them the sample. As they drove off, she proceeded to call her friend and wait for the police to arrive.

* * *

Upon arriving at the hospital, Alicia was doomed to wait while they took Diane away to examine her. As she sat down in a chair in a small waiting area in the hallway, she noticed that she was shaking. Whatever she had expected when they walked inside the house, this certainly hadn't been it. 

Tears began to roll down her face when the image of Diane flooded her mind again, she didn't even want to imagine what she had been through but the sight of Diane, her clothes torn, her face and body bloody and beaten as well as the undoubted evidence of what he had done to her left little to the imagination of what she had to endure.

"Alicia! Alicia! Where is Diane? Is- how is she?" Will's voice pulled her out of her thoughts after waiting for half an hour, she looked up and saw him running towards her. Alicia stood, and when she saw him, she couldn't help but be a little surprised when she saw the amount of fear and panic on his face, even if she knew how close they were.

"They are still examining her...it's bad, Will," Alicia said and watched as he sunk down on the chair next to hers.

"What...what happened?" he asked his face pale and his eyes fixing the wall ahead of them.

"We don't really know, she couldn't move or talk. He injected her with some substance, we only know she was attacked by an unknown man yesterday." Alicia answered him, and Will had never felt like this in his life before. Frightened and angry and helpless, oh so helpless.

"I talked to her when I left the office...it was around ten. I must have been the last to see her. If I had only insisted on taking her home, I thought about it, she worked too long the last few days. Maybe I could have stopped this." Will murmured and clenched his fists.

"Will, blaming yourself won't help Diane, she needs her friends now. This is going to be hell for her." 

"Did he really-" Will couldn't say it out loud, "I mean, how do you know when she couldn't talk?" he looked at Alicia and saw her shudder. 

"We found her on the floor of her home office. Her blouse and bra were torn off, her slip and pantyhose pulled down, and there was blood and- sperm." she only whispered the last word. Still, Will heard it anyway and jumped up from his chair paced around the hallway, his hands gripping his hair to the point were he almost tore it from his head.

"I'm going to find him... I'm going to find him, and if it's the last thing I do, I'll find him, and I'll kill him with my bare hands. I'll cut his fucking dick off with a rusty steak knife and let him bleed out." he said to himself, and Alicia was sure he had never seen Will so angry. It was almost scary. 

"We'll find him, and he will pay for what he did," she said, and while Will sat down again, it didn't seem her words had been able to calm him down. They waited for hours, which felt like days to them, not knowing how Diane was doing, how much damage this man had done. 

"Mr. Gardner? Mrs. Florrick?" they looked up, but instead of a doctor, they saw two Detectives standing in front of them, showing their badges. One was a tall, dark-haired

man in his late forties and the other was a woman around Alicia's age and height with dark-blonde hair and a scar on her chin. 

"I'm Detective Warren, and this is my partner Detective Sheridan. We're working on the case of the assault on Miss Lockhart. Could we ask you some questions?" the male Detective asked.

"Yes, did you already find anything that could help you find that son of a bitch?" Will asked. 

"Not at the moment, our colleagues at the crime scene do their very best. But anything you tell us might help," the man said and took a small notepad from his pocket. 

"Mrs. Florrick, Miss Sharma, told us you two found Miss Lockhart at her home office?" 

"Yes. Diane didn't show up at work today, and nobody could reach her. Will asked us to stop by her house when Kalinda, Miss Sharma, and I were on our way to a client. We rang the doorbell for a few times, but she didn't answer," Alicia started.

"And around what time was that?" Detective Sheridan asked.

"It must have been around half-past ten," she answered, and the woman nodded, telling her to continue.

"I don't really know why, I just tried the doorknob, and the front door opened. Both Kalinda and I knew something was not alright, Diane would never leave her door unlocked. So we went inside and called her named, but got no answer. Kalinda heard a noise coming from the home office down the hall, when we entered we- it smelled off and when we looked around and…found her behind her desk." Alicia had to pause. Once again, the image of Diane lying there flashed through her mind.

"In what state was Miss Lockhart?"

"She couldn't talk or move, Kalinda later found some substance by the door and an injection side on Diane's neck. Her clothes were torn, she was beaten, and there were blood and sperm on her thigh and chest. We called the police and an ambulance, we also tried to ask her what happened, and she was able to blink yes and no. She said she was attacked that night, she didn't know who it was and that he wasn't waiting for her in her apartment." 

"Did you notice anything suspicious?" the man asked without thinking, and Alicia frowned at him.

"Apart from finding my boss beaten and raped?" 

"Mrs. Florrick-" 

"No, I know what you meant, but it was still insensitive. I couldn't have noticed anything wrong, I was never at Diane's before. But nothing looked out of place." Alicia answered, and the attention of the two turned to Will.

"Mr. Gardner, when was the last time you saw or talked to Miss. Lockhart?"

"I think I'm the last one who saw her, we were at work. I… I wanted to take her home, but she insisted on staying," he began, but Detective Warren interrupted him. 

"And where did you go once you left the office?" Alicia saw how Will's whole body tensed before she could do something he jumped up and grabbed the Detective by his collar. 

"If you only think for one second that I did this- that I could do something like that to her, I swear I'll make sure you will only step inside a police station to clean the fucking toilette!" Detective Sheridan pulled Will off her partner and stepped between them. 

"That was not at all what my partner wanted to imply, Mr. Gardner. We -" this time, they were interrupted by a doctor. 

"Excuse me, Detectives, I'm Doctor Schwartz, you wanted to be informed when the examination is over-" 

"How is Diane?" Will asked immediately, and the Doctor eyed him suspiciously.

"Mr. Gardner, please, let us speak to the doctor first." Warren began, and Will already opened his mouth to answer, but Alicia grabbed his hand. To their surprise, the Doctor now turned to Will. 

"Are you Will Gardner?" 

"Yes," 

"Okay, well, Miss Lockhart only agreed to talk to you with Mr. Gardner present," he told the Detectives, who shared a look. 

"I'll go and meet with Kalinda," Alicia said quickly before Will, and the Detectives followed Dr. Schwartz. 

"How is Miss Lockhart doing? Is she able to speak?" 

"Thanks to the sample the paramedics brought with them, we were able to identify what paralyzed her. It's a new mixture of muscle relaxants, we never saw anything like this before, if this gets on the market we're facing the ultimate drug, and we're not only talking about rape. We found an antidote, but I'd feel better if I never have to see something like this again." Dr. Schwartz said with a sigh and then continued, Will could barely listen. 

"Her physical wounds were not that hard to treat, we did a full rape kit which unsurprisingly came back positive. He really did a number on her, she needs a good therapist. Please keep it short, okay?" Doctor Schwartz said and gestured to a door. Without another word, Will pushed past the Detectives and walked inside the room. 

Upon seeing Diane, he froze. Her face was bruised, her lip split, and there were two band-aids on her left cheek and forehead, but it wasn't the wounds on her face that made him stop. It was her whole look. Diane was a proud and elegant woman who wasn't afraid to speak her mind, but now she looks so fragile and broken, she didn't look like the Diane he knew, like his best friend.

"Will?" though her voice was faint, it was enough to end his rigidity, and in the next second, he was by her side and holding her hand. Diane's cold fingers closed around his hand like she was afraid that if she was to let go of it, he would disappear. 

"Will...Will I-" her voice gave away, and Will saw tears run down his best friend's face, and there was such a look of terror and fear on her face that he almost had to look away. 

"Shh, it's okay I'm here Diane, I'm here. Diane listen to me, I swear I won't give up until we have that son of a bitch, I'll hunt him down personally if I have to! He is going to pay for every single thing, we'll make him regret getting born okay?" Will told her, and that he was there, holding her hand was able to calm Diane down. She just didn't want to be alone, she needed Will by her side. 

"Miss. Lockhart? I'm Detective Sheridan; I'd like to ask you some questions if that's alright with you?" Will was glad that the Detective's douche bag partner had stayed outside. 

"Yes," Diane answered, and Will laid his other hand above hers, so he held it with both his hands now. 

"Do you really want me to stay?" he asked, and Diane's fingers closed tightly around his. 

"Please don't leave!" 

"Alright, I won't go anywhere, okay? I won't leave your side," he answered quickly and watched as Diane took a deep breath before focusing on the Detective. 

"If you need a break or want to continue this another-" but Diane interrupted her.

"I just went through the most humiliating examination of my life after being raped, let's get this over with, god knows I'll have to tell it often enough." 

"Okay. Can you tell me what happened when you arrived at your apartment?" 

"I unlocked the front door and barely made a step inside when he grabbed me. He injected me with that drug and put his hand over my mouth so I couldn't scream. I tried to fight him off, but I couldn't...I-" Diane took a shaky breath before continuing.

"He dragged me inside, and I began to lose all feeling in my body, starting with my arms and legs. He pushed me to my office and pinned me to my desk I-" she paused, partly because it was still difficult to talk and because she couldn't tell the Detective that she actually called Will, while he was sitting next to her holding her hand.

"He...undressed me...touched me. I couldn't move, I couldn't do anything. Then he raped me." she desperately tried not to cry, she was sick and tired of crying, but as she told the Detective what happened, it was like she was back there with him. She could almost feel him inside of her, his hands on her body, hear his taunting. 

"Diane?" Will's gentle voice pulled her out of the prison that her mind was now, and she looked at him. "Do you need a break?" but she shook her head. 

"When he- finished, I thought it was over, he just left me there and disappeared for a while. When he came back, he raped me again…he threw me on the floor when he finished and said this was where I belonged." 

"And you didn't recognize him?" 

"No, I- I mean he had a ski mask on I never saw his face. But he said he met me before." 

"I'm sorry for asking this, but did he use protection?" almost involuntarily, her grip on Will's hand tightened and felt tears falling from her eyes.

"No." Detective Sheridan nodded and added it to her notes.

"Did he talk to you during it?" Diane nodded, yes. 

"He wouldn't shut up…constantly telling me how good it was, how much I liked it."

"We're almost done, Miss Lockhart. Could you please tell me if he bit you?" Diane frowned a little, how did this Detective know so much about her tormentor's modus operandi?

"Yes...here." and she pulled down the hospital gown and showed the bandage. "How did you know?" she asked this time. The other woman sighed and looked at them both. 

"In the past half-year, there were similar attacks on women. But none of them have been paralyzed like you or raped a second time. We actually believe this was well planned, and the other women were test runs for you. The only thing that was always constant was the bite." 

"Half a year? And he could still do this to Diane? What the fuck have you been doing?" Will burst out, and it took him a lot of restrain not to jump up. 

"Will..." Diane simply said, and the Detective was surprised it was enough to calm him down once more. 

"Miss Lockhart, do you know what he did when he left you alone?" 

"No, I have no idea." Sheridan nodded slightly 

"Okay...is there anything else you remember? Something that could help us?" she asked, and Diane didn't know if she should tell her, what difference would it make? In the end, it didn't matter. Will suddenly sat up straighter.

"Wait a second...Diane, the butt dail...that was no butt dail you- you called me for help, and I hung up on you," he said astonished and stared at her, Diane could see how he began to blame himself and squeezed his hand. 

"Will, it's not your-" but Will jumped up from his chair and ran his hands over his face, his heart was pounding in his chest. She had called him scared and desperate for help while that son of a bitch had attacked her, and he had hung up on her! Even if he thought it was a butt dial, he always called Diane back, always. Just not yesterday when he should have. 

Will didn't even notice he had left the room, nor did he see how he came to stand before the nurse's office. He noticed his reflection in the window of the door and how much he loathed himself at that moment. With a frustrated scream, he punched the glass and sent bits of broken glass and blood flying everywhere. The pain took forever to kick in, but when it did, Will knew deserved it. 

He stutters a lame apology as he was surrounded by nurses and taken away to treat his hand. The only thing that probably saved him from the psych ward was the one nurse who saw him coming from Diane's room and thought he was her boyfriend or something. 

Will somehow hadn't managed to break his hand, but there were a few deep cuts that had to be stitched. The other thing was that he felt even more miserable for leaving Diane alone, breaking his promise to her, so now he was standing in front of her room and taking a deep breath. 

"Stop making this about you, Diane needs you now, and you won't break that promise again," Will said to himself before he opened the door. 

Upon his entrance, Diane looked up, she laid on her side, curled up under the covers of her bed. "What did you do?" she asked when she saw his heavily bandaged hand. 

"Something stupid, I lost control. Listen, I'm sorry, Diane. I shouldn't have left you, I promised I'd stay by your side, and I already fucked up." Will said as he sat down beside her again. 

"No, you didn't...but please don't blame yourself, it would have happened if you hung up or not." 

For a while they were quiet, Will took her hand once more and let his thump trace her knuckles. There were no words necessary, they understood each other with or without words. 

"Will?" 

"Hm?" 

"Could you...lay with me? I- I'm tired, but I'm afraid to fall asleep," Diane whispered, and Will study her expression for a moment. 

"Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to-" he wanted to say _trigger you_ , but Diane understood. 

"You won't," she reassured him, and then he slowly laid beside her, facing her and gently held her in his arms. Against his expectations, Diane had shifted closer to him and pillowed her head against his chest. 

"I will never forgive him for what he as done to you...but I'm glad you're still alive. I don't know what I'd do without you, Diane." 

"Why? Why did he do this to me? Why me?" he could feel her begin to tremble in his arms, which soon evolved into a full-blown body shaking sobs

"Diane, we'll get through this! You're one of the most wonderful and strongest people I now in this universe. We'll catch him, and he'll pay for everything." Will said and then simply held her in his arms and stroked over her shacking back until the crying fit, and the exhaustion let her fall asleep. 

"You'll get through this, Diane, and I promise I'll protect you and be by your side for it all." 

* * *

Hi there

I hope you like the new chapter, I gave my best! 

Thank you so much for the comments and kudos! 

Even though I'm sleep-deprived now, but it's worth it for you guys!

I never thought you would read my Lockner stories! :)

Thank You!


	3. Chapter 3

" _You feel so good, Diane...you like it, don't you? I can see that you like it, I know you do."_

" _You can't get enough of me... You'll never forget this, oh Fuck baby."_

_She was back on her desk, he was on top of her, inside her, she couldn't move she couldn't scream for help. The smell of his sweat and cheap cologne invaded her nostrils, his disgusting tongue on her cheek, his hands all over her body, the heavy grunting in her ear._

_"We'll meet again, Diane, I'll come for you."_

* * *

Diane woke up with a scream, at first, she didn't know where she was, it was dark, and she was alone, and for a moment she was sure that he was standing beside her bed, watching her. She was drenched in cold sweat, and her heart was thumping so hard in her chest it hurt. 

"Will?" she screamed in panic, but then such a strong wave of nausea hit her, that Diane tried to get up to reach the bathroom. The moment she tried to walk, though, a severe pain shot through her body outgoing from her vagina that caused her to collapse right away. The pain also caused her to throw up the sparse contents of her stomach, which was mostly water. It didn't stop, however, and even though her stomach was empty, she was still dry heaving until she threw up gastric juice and bile. 

Diane fell to the cold floor next to her pool of vomit as a sobbing mess clutching her abdomen.

"Diane? Oh my god- I need some help here!" Will shouted behind him as he ran towards Diane on the floor. Ignoring his own wound, he picked her up and laid her back on the bed, holding her in his arms, as two nurses came running into the room. 

"Careful, she got sick," he warned without as much as a glance at the two, his whole focus on the woman in his arms. "Diane, what happened? Are you okay?" 

"I had a nightmare...he- he was back...I got sick, I'm sorry...I tried to make it to the bathroom." Diane explained as she slowly calmed down in his arms. 

"No need to apologize, Miss Lockhart, I understand, can I do anything for you? Do you need something for the nausea?" one nurse asked after checking if everything was okay, while the other cleaned up the vomit, but Diane shook her head.

"No." 

"That's why I told you I should stay with her! You can sue me if you want, but I'll stay right here until she is released do you understand me?" Will growled. He had been forced to leave Diane's room when the Doctor found him a few hours after Diane had fallen asleep, even though the nurses had let it pass. 

"Mr. Gardner, please, we can't-" 

"I don't give a fuck about your hospital rules. I know you only do your job, and you have my permission to tell your bosses you did everything you could, but I'm a total asshole that won't listen to you." Will said calmly but not less definite. The two nurses looked at each other and seemed to come to a silent agreement. 

"Okay, you can stay," one of them said, "We'll come by every now and then and before Dr. Schwartz makes his rounds." Will was genuinely thankful for what they did. 

"I know that's not easy, so thank you, we really appreciate it." with that the two left the room, leaving Diane and Will alone. 

"You weren't there, and I panicked..." Diane confessed in a whisper, and Will laid them down again and pulled her into his arms. Diane immediately shifted close to him, and her hand grabbed his shirt, like she needed something of him to hold on to. 

"I'm sorry like I said they kicked me out. I won't leave again, Diane. Are you feeling better or still nauseous?" he asked quietly. 

"Okay..." she mumbled, Will could still feel her trembling in his arms and pulled the covers a little bit higher and tighter around her. "What are we going to do, Will?" 

"What do you mean?"

"The firm, my cases…I can't stay away." 

"Diane, you were assaulted...please think about yourself for once," Will said, but Diane shook her head. 

"I can't if I think about myself now...I fear there won't be anything to return to," she said and took a deep breath, "Do they know? The partners?" she asked quietly. 

"I called them after I got kicked out of your room, I had to do something, or I would've destroyed more hospital property. They know you were attacked, but not what exactly happened. But you know that there are many money-grubbing bastards in the Chicago PD, it'll probably be the headline of tomorrow's newspaper." 

"I bet David already measures out my office."

"He wouldn't dare to, not now, and if he did, I'd give him a piece of my mind."

"Who talked to my clients?" 

"I did, everything is arranged, Diane, please we'll take care of it, you-"

"I can't, Will." he frowned, and even though she couldn't see it, he glanced down to her head on his chest. 

"What do you mean?" 

"I can't focus on me...I can't do this- but I can focus on my work." Diane said, and Will held in a sigh. 

"You don't have to do anything right now." 

"My work is my life...he took everything else from me, I won't let him take the rest, Will." 

"Diane, you are still the same-" Will tried to argue, he couldn't bear the way she was talking about herself. He would hate this man forever for what he did, that he managed what hundreds of others couldn't, that Diane Lockhart doubted herself.

"No, I'm not the same... I'll never be the same." Will closed his eyes and didn't know what to say, nothing seemed right, that was until he felt the wetness against his chest through the fabric of his shirt. He pulled Diane tighter to his chest and stroked over her back in soothing circles until she had calmed down. 

"You'll always be the Diane, I know. That strong, independent, intelligent, beautiful, funny, ass-kicking woman. And you're are the only one who can define you, Diane, no one else." he said and pressed a small kiss to her hairline.

"I can never thank you enough, Will," Diane whispered and shifted a little in his arms, needing the warmth his body gave her.

"You don't have to, please don't ever think you have to do anything in return for this. I belong right here beside you." and Will never meant anything more in his life. Because he loved Diane, not like a friend, but as a woman. Will always had a crush on her, from the moment on they met. He had fallen in love with that wonderful woman she was, but he had never thought he stood a chance with her. 

Then they became friends, even under Jonas Stern, who never made that easy, they managed to stay friends, there was always something that was between them. Even after the most heated arguments during which they had been at each other's throat, they had still managed to stay friends. 

Will loved Diane, but as he didn't want to endanger their friendship, he never acted upon his feelings, even though he always got jealous when she went out with other men. Will had never felt like this with anyone else, he had sex with so many women as a pathetic try to fill the void that his unrequited love left inside him. For a short while, he had tried to project his feelings for Diane on Alicia, but it had been a mistake, leaving both of them hurt. 

And now there was this man, this unknown man whom Will would make personally curse the day he had laid eyes on Diane and had planned his assault on her. There was nothing in the world that could stop him. Will would move heaven and hell to find whoever did this to Diane.

"Thank you, Will..." he gently squeezed her shoulder in response. For a while, they were quiet again. 

"Are you tired?" he asked quietly. 

"Yes," Diane admitted, but she was scared of what would happen when she closed her eyes. She wasn't ready to face it again, to be back with him.

"I'll stay with you this time, and whenever I think something is wrong, I'll wake you up, agreed?" she slowly nodded against his chest. "Good, do you want me to sing?" 

"Good lord, no," Diane answered, and unknowingly to him, Will had managed to put a small smile on her lips for a few seconds. 

* * *

Will stayed awake the rest of the night to make sure that Diane could sleep. He only had to prevent one nightmare from happening, and the rest of the night went over peacefully for Diane. 

He was about to look at what time it was when the door opened, and a nurse stepped inside. 

"Good morning, how are you?" Will sighed. 

"Tired, but fine. Should I wake her?" he asked, and the woman nodded. Sitting up, straighter Will gently shook Diane, "Diane? Diane wake up." it only took a few seconds until Diane startled awake. 

"Hey, it's alright, the nurse is here." Diane also sat up in bed, and Will got up, his back hurt a little, and his neck was stiff, but if Diane was able to have a few hours of sleep, it was worth it. 

"How are you feeling, Miss Lockhart?" the nurse asked, and Diane took a deep breath.

"Okay...I guess, still a little tired and...sore." Diane said, and the nurse checked her vitals before she handed her two plastic cups, one filled with water, and the other smaller one contained a few pills. 

"These are antibiotics against STDs and the second...emergency contraception pill," she said, and Diane looked at the pills in her hand. Will shared a look with the nurse when Diane did not take them.

"Diane?" Will asked carefully. 

"I never had to take any of these...not once. Now I have to take a Plan B pill because my rapist wouldn't use a condom and tried to impregnate me," she mumbled and then took the pills, the resignation in her voice made Will reach for her hand. 

"Everything looks okay, Dr. Schwartz will look at you in a few minutes, and he'll clear you to go." the young woman said and turned to go, but halfway to the door she paused and walked back once more.

"I-I don't want to overstep boundaries...I just… I'd like to help you," she said quite nervous before she pulled a piece of paper from her breast pocket and handed it, Diane. "He was my therapist...and he really helped me." she gave them a small smile and then turned to leave once more. 

"Wait!" Diane called, and the nurse turned around. "Thank you...for everything, but especially for holding my hand." the young woman nodded and then left the room. 

"When did she hold your hand?" 

"During the examination...that was nearly as bad as the rape itself... I still couldn't move or talk much, and they were...taking pictures and samples and everything. And suddenly she was there, holding my hand and talking to me...telling me what they were doing." 

Before Will could answer, there was a knock on the door, and a moment later, Kalinda peeked inside. 

"Hey, can I come in?" she asked, and Diane nodded.

"Of course you can," she answered, and Kalinda stepped inside the room, a travel bag over her shoulder, and walked up to Diane's bed.

"I won't ask you how you are doing, but it's good to see you, Diane. I brought you some clothes and some other things you might need. I hate to say it, but the police left your place in quite the state of chaos." Kalinda said and sat down beside Diane. 

"Thank you, Kalinda, for everything," Diane said, and the investigator gave her a small smile. "What- did they find anything?" she asked and squeezed Will's hand. 

"Yes, but whoever did this was good in hiding his traces. Like professionally good, there were other assaults, they think it might be the same one...but I don't think so. I know the other perp was overconscientious to leave no DNA behind, he even cleaned the bite wounds on the other victims. But the man who attacked you didn't, because the police won't find anything on him when they test it." Kalinda told them, and both Diane and Will were a little surprised by how much she knew. 

"How could you-" but Kalinda interrupted Diane.

"I worked through the night and pulled a few favors. I won't let him get away for what he did, Diane, none of us will. You're not alone; we stand behind you," Kalinda said thoughtfully, "And you don't need to thank me for anything, Diane." she added before Diane could open her mouth.

"Yes, I do, Kalinda, you don't know how much that means," she said, and Kalinda only nodded. 

"There's one more thing," their investigator said and looked a little uncomfortable for the first time. 

"The police let it slip," Will answered for her and Kalinda nodded. She leaned down and pulled a newspaper from the bag and showed them. 

' _Chicago Lawyer Sexually Assaulted!'_ read the headline. There were two pictures, one covered half the page and showed Diane's house, with the police banner and police cars, and the smaller one was shown in the corner of the big picture, showing a professional photo of Diane. 

"Wonderful, at least now nobody has to wonder what exactly happened," Diane answered and took a deep breath, "Is...is the press here?" she wanted to know, but Kalinda shook her head. 

"No, I checked, but I don't think it'll take long before some of them show up. They will check every hospital." before they could continue, the door opened, and Dr. Schwartz, together with two nurses, walked inside. When he spotted Will, he frowned. 

"I thought I made-" 

"I asked him to be here." Diane interrupted him, and for a second, she sounded like the old Diane.

"Alright, I still have to ask you two leave, you can wait in the hall." Will stood up and then leaned down to press a kiss on her forehead, and then he and Kalinda left the room.

They waited for a few minutes before Kalinda began to speak. 

"How is she really doing?" 

"It was a rough night, she'll only get through this with us by her side. She only wants to focus on the firm, can you believe that? She gets assaulted and wants to focus on the firm." he said and leaned against the wall. 

"That's how she is, and I understand her. She just needs time, and I think I would do the same. I really like her." Kalinda answered honestly. 

"So the grumpy cousin finally admits she likes her family, wonderful," Will couldn't help but tease, and Kalinda nudged him in the side. But she couldn't really disagree with him, she did like them, and she would do anything for them.

"Did you find anything on who could have done this to her?"

"No, like I said, he was very good, but I won't stop until I find out." 

"Diane said he left her alone after- after the first time. What did he do, did they find anything?"

"Not that I know, but I'll check that personally," Kalinda answered.

"She called me Kalinda..." Will said quietly, "She called me to get help...while that bastard did that to her. She could say anything, and I thought it was a butt call. She needed my help more than ever, and I hung up on her. I always call her back, always, but I didn't, and there was no reason not to...I just...didn't," 

"Is that why you tried to break your hand in punching a window?" he looked at her, confused, wondering how she could know, but Kalinda only shrugged her shoulders. 

"I overheard the nurses talking. Apparently, they thought it was bizarrely romantic, that the boyfriend of their patient sent his fist through a window after finding out what had happened to his girlfriend. They also said you screamed you would find the one who hurt her." 

"What the fuck? Yes, I punched through the window, and I screamed, but certainly not this,"

"Well, how can you blame them? You've been by her side the whole night, that certainly looks like there is more-" 

"Kalinda! Kalinda, she was raped I'm not-" but Kalinda raised her hands in surrender and interrupted him.

"I know Will, but I'm also with you for five years now...I see the way you look at her." Will stared at her in shock.

"Kalinda I-I never...how?" he asked, and Kalinda smiled. 

"I'm the best investigator you ever had, I wouldn't be if I didn't. But now I'm absolutely sure. And she needs you, Will, just continue with that." 

"I don't want to talk about this right now, Kalinda," Will answered honestly, and Kalinda nodded. 

The door to Diane's room opened, and the Doctor and the nurses walked out. When he spotted the two, he walked over to them. 

"Well, Miss Lockhart can be released as soon as she signed the papers. We took care of her injuries as best as we could, she has a prescription for some pain medication, and we recommend that she stays with someone for the next few days. If there are any complications, then please call." 

"Alright, thank you, Dr. Schwartz," Will said, and they walked away. They waited for another few minutes until Diane stepped out of her room, dressed in a pair of jeans and a cream-colored cashmere pullover. Will immediately stepped close and took the bag from her hands. 

"Don't even try to argue," Will said before Diane could open her mouth. She turned to Kalinda instead. 

"Congratulations, you found a pair of jeans in my closet," Kalinda smiled. 

"Thank you, I almost gave up, after half an hour," she answered, "I always wanted to see you in those," Kalinda added, and Diane couldn't help but smile a little. They dealt with the formalities and then proceeded to leave the hospital. But when they stood in front of the doors to the entrance, Diane paused. They all saw the reporters hanging around the other side of the street. 

"Fuck, those assholes." Will cursed and wanted to turn around, but Diane didn't move.

"Tell me I can do this," she asked quietly as she stared outside. Will and Kalinda shared a look behind her back, and then Will stepped beside her and took her hand. 

"You can do this, Diane," he said without a doubt in his voice. Kalinda also stood beside her and laid a hand on her shoulder.

"You can do this, and we'll help you." Diane swallowed and took a deep breath, then she stepped outside. She would get through this, and she could find the bastard who tried to ruin her life. 

* * *

Hello dear readers, 

I hope you liked the new chapter, we'll slowly pick up the pace. 

Please tell me what you think in a comment!

Thanks for all the kind responses I got from you on the last chapters!


	4. Chapter 4

“Miss Lockhart, what happened to you?” 

“Were you raped?” 

“Do you know the man who raped you?” 

“Can you give us any details?”

The reporters fired questions at them the moment they spotted her walking out of the hospital. Diane’s grip on Will’s hand tightened as they made their way through the crowd as the reporters asked her all those questions without any regard for her feelings. Did they ever ask themselves sincerely what it was like to be asked all those things in public? Did they really think she would simply answer: _‘Yes, a man forced his way inside my apartment, he paralyzed me with a new drug that left me defenseless and then brutally raped me twice. He also didn’t use a condom to make it more humiliating! For pictures, go see the doctors.’_

None of them answered or even looked at them. Will trusted the keys to his car to Kalinda before he opened the backdoor so Diane could get in, Kalinda also took Diane’s bag from him and threw it on the passenger seat so they could get away faster. Will looked at Diane as Kalinda drove away from the reporters and couldn’t help but worry at how pale she looked.

“See? You did it.” Diane tried a small smile, but it looked rather forced. 

“Yeah…but I don’t think they will leave me alone for a while,” she answered, and Will couldn’t argue with her. Before he could say anything else, though, his phone rang. It was their Trustee Hayden, he glanced at his watch and noticed that he was already late for their appointment. 

“Damn,” he mumbled and answered the call, “Hello Mr. Hayden...yes, I’m sorry that we’re not there, but there was an emergency...yes it is true, and I’m with Diane at the moment, we want to reschedule to-” before Will could continue Diane grabbed his arm and made him look at her. 

Will took the phone from his ear and covert the microphone. “What-?” 

“Don’t reschedule. We’ll be there in twenty minutes,” she said, and for a moment Will didn’t know what to say. 

“What? Diane, no, we can do this another time!” he argued, but Diane leaned forward to Kalinda.

“Would you take us to the firm?” she asked, and Kalinda nodded. Will sighed then lifted the phone back to his ear. 

“Hayden? We’ll be there in twenty minutes, could you wait for us, please?...Thank you.” with that he hung up and looked at Diane. 

“Are you really sure you want to do this? It can wait.” Will tried again.

“Will? I need to do this. Please, let me do this. Trust me.” he saw the plea in her eyes, that she needed to do this now, that there would be a time when she couldn’t. When the events would catch up with her and breach the protection wall, she was building around herself. A time when she would need him by her side more than ever, but until that time was there, Will had no other choice but to respect her wishes and be there for her. 

Once again he admired Diane for how incredibly strong she was. For a moment, Will wished that he had the guts to tell Diane how he felt and that he loved her more than anyone. Will wished he had told her years ago, maybe none of this would’ve happened, perhaps, they would be planning their weekend now, which friends they would meet or what they should cook. He’d be the usual klutz in the kitchen and be degraded to peel and clean the dishes, maybe then they would watch some movie or go out and have some awesome sex to end the day in one of the best ways.

He’d give almost anything to turn this fantasy into reality, but now they had to deal with how things were. 

“Of course, I trust you. Let’s go.” Will answered, and Diane gave his hand a thankful squeeze. Diane knew that if she could do any of this, no matter what, it was because Will was by her side and gave her the support she needed.

When they arrived at their firm, and the three got out of Will’s car and took an elevator up to their level, she felt how her heart began to beat faster once again. She was nervous, she couldn’t even remember if she had been this nervous before, it was one thing how thousands of unknown people reacted to the news of what had happened to her. But it was a whole different thing with the reaction of the people working at their firm, people she was responsible for, and let alone the ones who would be more than happy to see her gone.

When the elevator stopped on their level, Diane took one last deep breath and straightened her posture even though it was still a bit painful. The metal doors opened and revealed the well-known reception of Lockhart, Gardner, and Associates with the usual hectic atmosphere, which changed immediately once they noticed who walked in. 

Diane ignored them all and walked straight to her office where they would meet with Hayden, but when she opened the door to her office, she saw two men sitting by her desk, two men she had never seen alone together and the sight itself was confusing. Both Cary and Eli jumped up when she stepped inside, and involuntarily she flinched back. 

“Diane! Oh my-…so it’s true?” Cary asked as he took in the injuries and band aid’s on her face and then looked in her eyes. For a moment, Diane thought she could see something in his eyes that reminded her of a child silently begging that whatever fantasy had been destroyed or replaced by reality wasn’t simply gone like that.

“Yes,” she answered quietly and saw how Cary’s jaw clenched, and how Eli closed his eyes. 

“Everything?” Cary asked, and Diane didn’t have to ask what he meant, Will didn’t have to either and opened his mouth to interfere, but Diane was faster. 

“Yes, everything. Some man overpowered me when I came home, he paralyzed me and...then he raped me.” against her will Diane felt tears burning in her eyes, but she managed to keep them from falling. Cary now closed his eyes too and shook his head.

Suddenly out of nowhere, he whirled around and hit her desk with his fist, causing everyone in the room to stare at him. Not one of them had expected such a reaction from him. But before anyone could say anything, Cary turned around and looked at her with such grim determination in his eyes that Diane felt a shudder run down her spine. 

“We will find that fucking son of a bitch, and they can try their luck in locking up what I left of him. I still have quite a few guys at the Attorney’s office, and the Police left that owe me a big deal, it’s time for them to return the favor.” 

“Cary, no, you don’t have to do this-” Diane tried to argue, but Cary interrupted her. 

“But I want to, and I will do it, Diane, if you want it or not. I won’t let this piece of crap getaway for what he did,” he said, gently squeezing the hand which had laid on his shoulder in an attempt to stop him, and then he was gone. 

“I’m sorry this happened to you Diane, nobody deserves that, but especially not you. If there is anything I can do, please don’t hesitate to ask, okay?” Eli said, and as he looked at her, Diane noticed with growing relief that she saw no pity in his eyes. Anger, Disbelief, and Sadness, but neither he nor Cary had looked at her with pity in their eyes, which showed Diane that at least the two of them still valued her, Diane, and did not only see the pathetic mess she was right now. 

“Thank you, Eli. I really appreciate it,” Diane answered, and with a nod, Eli proceeded to leave, but when he opened the door, Diane thought of something he could do. 

“Wait, Eli!” she called, and he turned around, looking at her expectantly. 

“Yes?” 

“There is already something I’d like to ask of you...could you...maybe talk to some of your reporter contacts? I-I need them to- leave me alone for the moment...they can have a statement if they want if they just leave me alone. I can’t answer their question now...I just can’t,” Diane explained, and Eli nodded at her. 

“It won’t be easy, and I can’t promise anything for everyone, but I’ll do my best to keep most of them off your back, okay?” 

“That’s all I want, thank you,” she replied, and Eli sent her a small smile. 

“No need to thank me, Diane.” with that, Eli also vanished, but he left the door open because at that moment, Hayden walked towards her office. 

“Maybe getting raped will give us more time to save us.” She mumbled, and Will turned his head so fast that she heard his neck crack in protest. 

“Please don’t ever say that again, Diane, I would’ve burned this place to the ground if it could have prevented anything from happening to you,” he said dead serious, and Diane was a little taken aback. 

“You...don’t really mean that do you?” she asked, but Will still looked serious. 

“I never meant anything more serious in my life, Diane, really,” before she could answer Hayden came in and closed the door to her office. 

“Mr. Gardner, Miss. Lockhart. First of all, I want to say that I’m shocked about what happened to you, Miss. Lockhart and we could move this to another day if you don’t feel like dealing with this now.” he began, and while he spoke, Diane noticed that there was also no pity in his eyes, but something much worse. She saw doubt and something she could only describe as dark curiosity as his eyes wandered over her, and she shifted closer to Will as she tried to keep the rising nausea at bay. 

“I’m here now, so let’s do this,” Diane told him, trying to put on her old mask, the mask the old Diane had used daily to hide her emotions, and keep her opponents in and out of court out of her head.

Will had also noticed the look in Hayden’s eyes, a look he couldn’t quite describe but certainly didn’t like. As they walked to the table in Diane’s office, he put himself in between them and stood next to Diane’s chair, blocking Hayden’s way and forcing him to take a seat next to him and not Diane, who couldn’t help but be thankful for what Will was doing. 

The meeting went over quite unspectacular, they still needed another forty million, but at least the way things were going looked promising. If Will won the case against Canning, then they would make almost twenty million in billable hours a year. But what was almost as relieving as the fact that they might be able to save their firm and employees from bankruptcy, was Hayden leaving. Diane never really had anything against Hayden personally, but the way he looked at her and talked to her that day let her conclude that he thought they might be playing him and had staged the whole thing. 

“What the hell was that?” Will asked her once as he watched Hayden leave while Diane leaned against her desk. She wouldn’t admit, but she was already a little bit tired by this visit so far, even though she had hardly done anything.

“I don’t know...maybe he thinks we staged this,” Diane answered him rather emotionless, and Will shook his head in disbelief. 

“He better doesn’t think that way or he and I will have a problem!” her partner growled as he threw a last dark look at Hayden’s back before it disappeared around the end of the hallway. 

“Alright, I have to work on my paperwork now, and I believe you have to do the same,” Diane said with a glance at Will, who looked somewhat troubled, knowing what was going through his mind Diane laid her hand on his arm. 

“Will you don’t have to stand next to me all the time, really, you can do your job I’m going to be fine. You can’t afford to delay your own paperwork any longer.” Will knew she was right, and it would be stupid to stand next to her desk while she did her paperwork, but even though he knew this, Will didn’t feel comfortable with the thought of leaving Diane alone. But he had no other choice, and he was right across the hall. 

“You are right, I’ll be in my office. If you need anything, you know where to find me,” he said and pressed a small kiss to the side of her head, but before he could walk away, Diane pulled him back and hugged him. 

“Thank you.” Will smiled and hugged her back. 

“We promised we’d always have each others back,” he answered.

“And nothing will ever change that,” Diane replied, and Will nodded. 

“Right, see you later.” 

Diane had only worked through her paperwork for a few hours, not even till lunch when her phone rang. 

“Diane Lockhart?” 

“Hello, Miss Lockhart. This is Detective Sheridan, I heard you were released from the hospital this morning, I hope you are feeling better.” 

“Define feeling better,” Diane said seriously but then reminded herself that the woman was only doing her job. “Did you find anything?” she asked back. 

“We’re still investigating, what we do know is that none of your neighbors saw anything unusual. But I’m calling because we still need an official statement for the report, would you mind coming to the station?” 

The almost good mood Diane had been in before the call because while doing her work, she was able to pretend that everything was back to normal, vanished in an instant. 

“I-” she was almost tempted to say no, she didn’t want to tell it again, to live through it again. “Yes, I’ll be on my way.” 

“Thank you, Station 19. Tell the Officer at the reception you have to see me.” with that they hung up and Diane took a deep breath, she looked up and saw that an important client was in a meeting with Will. She couldn’t ask him to come with her, he had already done so much, which was important too if they lost their focus than Lockhart, Gardner, and Associates couldn’t be saved.

At that moment, someone knocked at her door, and as Diane turned her head, she saw Alicia standing there. With a wave, the younger woman stepped inside and gave a small unsure smile. 

“You’re already back?” Alicia asked carefully, and she nodded. 

“Yes...I need to focus on the firm, I just- I need time to sort out this mess my life became.” 

“Yeah, I understand. You won’t believe what the others say about you, especially the younger women.” Diane frowned at her, not knowing if she really wanted to know what they thought of her. Sensing what Diane was thinking, Alicia quickly answered. 

“No, nothing like that, they admire you for your strength. You went through a nightmare, and a day later, you’re back at work. They believe you’re Wonder Woman, that nothing can bring you down.” she said, and Diane looked at her hands and shook her head in disbelief. 

“I don’t know if I’m strong or just too weak to deal with it,” she whispered, and Alicia couldn’t believe that Diane thought she was weak for not being over what happened to her after a day. 

“Diane, I’m way out of bounds here, but you are way stronger than you think you are. You survived something horrible, and you still think about those around you. It doesn’t mean you are weak, everybody deals with things differently, and this is your way, this is your fight, and while you’re not alone, you can choose the way of fighting. The rest of us, well, we’ll just follow your lead.” 

“Alicia...would go to the police station with me? I have to give my official statement, and I can’t do it by myself.” Diane said out loud before she could properly think about what she was saying. But before Diane could take it back, Alicia nodded. 

“Of course, I’ll just get my stuff and meet you in a couple of minutes.” with that, she was out of the door, and Diane was alone again. She thought about telling Will, but he was still in the meeting. With a sigh, she stood up, ignoring the pain in her body, and walked to her assistant. 

“If Will asks, then tell him I’m at the Police Station, okay? I’m in a meeting for everyone else, alright?” she says, and her assistant nodded quickly. 

“Yes, of course, Miss Lockhart.” the young woman answered, but before she could say anything else, Diane walked back inside her office and got her things before walking out of the side entrance of her office. As she made her way through the hallways, she could tell people were staring at her, but Diane ignored them and walked to Alicia’s office, who was just about to walk back to her. 

The two made their way downstairs to the parking area in silence, neither of them knew how to break the silence while they both were so deep in their thoughts. A few minutes into the drive when Alicia noticed Diane shifting uncomfortably in her seat, Alicia spoke up. 

“Something wrong?” she asked and threw a worried glance at her boss.

“No, not really, just the pain meds wearing off,” Diane confessed and looked through her bag for the little bottle of pills she had been prescribed. 

“I have some water in my handbag, you can take it, I didn’t drink from it,” Alicia said, and Diane gave a small smile. 

“Even if you had I wouldn’t care, I-” Diane didn’t finish the sentence as she took one pill and washed it down with some water. She wanted to say that she didn’t mind sharing some water as long as Alicia didn’t care because Diane could still taste him in her mouth and had the ridiculous thought she left him behind on everything her lips touched.

“How’s the Orban case going?” Diane asked in the desperate attempt to change the subject because she was feeling nauseous again. For the rest of the ride to two talked about their work and how their cases were going, as much as she didn’t like to admit it, Diane and Alicia hadn’t talked like this in a long time, if ever. 

The conversation which had been going on quite pleasantly found a sudden end when Diane felt the words dying in her throat when Alicia drove on the parking space of Station 19. 

“Do you need a moment?” Alicia asked, but Diane just shook her head. “Alright-” but Diane unbuckled herself and opened the passenger door. 

“Let’s go.” 

* * *

Diane signed the statement she had just finished writing, after the questioning if she already remembered more details, and had a hard time to believe she had managed to write one legible word with how much her hand was shaking. She swallowed the lump in her throat and laid the pen down. 

“Can I go now?” she asked quietly, but the apologetic look on the face of the Detective told her that they weren’t done here yet. 

“Miss. Lockhart, you have to reread it to check for...slips of the pen. And I would like to ask for your permission to record it.” 

“Okay, you may record it,” Diane answered and then turned to look at Alicia. “You don’t have to stay...if you don’t want to.” 

“If you want me...allow me to be here, then I’ll stay Diane,” Alicia told her quietly, and Diane nodded. 

“Alright, we can start.” Detective Sheridan began the recording, beginning with her official statement before she nodded towards Diane, who read her personal data before her actual statement. 

“When I came home around half past eleven on the eighth of August 2011, an unknown man forced his way inside my apartment as I unlocked my door. He grabbed me and pushed me inside my apartment, I tried to fight him off, but he injected me with some drug that paralyzed me. 

In a short amount of time, I couldn’t move anymore. He dragged me inside my home office and pushed me on my desk...my phone slid from my pocket, and I saw my last chance, I tried to call my friend Will Gardner, but the man noticed and prevented me from saying anything in forcing his glove in my mouth and covering it with his hand. 

Mr. Gardner thought it was an unintentional call. The man ripped off my blouse, he ignored my plea to stop and groped my breasts before he kissed me. He taunted me and told me he was surprised I already begged him to stop and that he expected more of me. I proceeded to take my coat off and cut away my bra.

At this point, I...I couldn’t move or talk anymore. I told me to say something if I wanted him to stop or say nothing if I wanted him to continue. He pulled my slip and pantyhose down, and my skirt up…he said he’s always wanted to do this... He dreamed of this since he first saw me.” 

Diane did her best to read what she had written, but as she had feared, she relived everything as she spoke. She tried to overact her trembling voice and concentrated on the paper in front of her, not really reading because she knew exactly what she had written, and full well knowing that she couldn’t start again once she stopped. Diane didn’t even notice the tears running down her cheeks or how her nails were digging into the flesh of her palms from how hard she had clenched them.

But Alicia noticed all of it, and her heart broke once again at the sight. At the same time, she couldn’t help but admire Diane for her strength, especially for what she had to do now. Wanting to do anything, just anything, Alicia held out her hand for Diane to take and couldn’t help but be a little surprised that the other woman accepted the offered support. 

“I was lying on my desk, unable to move or talk, and he...he raped me. He...pushed his fingers inside me. After a few moments, he...removed them, and then he penetrated me with his penis. He claimed that I liked it...that I loved it and how- good it felt. When he got close to his climax, he said I wasn’t lucky to get pregnant before in my life, but that it might happen now, and then he came inside of me. He bit me during it.” Diane had to pause to regain her posture and fight off the feelings of shame and disgust at herself. 

“He left the room, and I have no idea what he did, I also have no idea who long he was gone. When he returned, he raped me once more, I managed to leave my body behind. I just let it happen. But when he noticed he began to hit me...he...made me have an orgasm and laughed as it happened, he continued to rape me until he came again. When he was finished, he threw me on the floor and told me this was where whores like me belonged, that I would never forget what happened and that he was a part of my life now. He injected me some other substance, and I lost consciousness shortly after, only regaining it when my colleagues Alicia Florrick and Kalinda Sharma came by my apartment in the morning and called the Police and ambulance.” 

“Alright, thank you, Miss Lockhart, you may go. But if there is anything you might remember in the future, please tell us. We will also notify you of any leads we might find,” the Detective said, and both Diane and Alicia stood. 

“Thank you, goodbye,” Diane said quietly before she and Alicia made their way out of the small conference room, which both women knew, also had a one-way mirror so any other Detectives could watch what happened in the room. 

“I don’t want to talk about any of it, okay?” Diane asked quietly as they took an elevator downstairs again, and Alicia nodded. 

“Of course, I-” but Alicia stopped herself, now was not the time. The two of them dove back to the firm, and when they stood in the elevator, taking them to their firm Diane spoke again for the first time. 

“Thank you, Alicia, for doing this, I-” 

“You don’t need to explain yourself, Diane, it’s alright, really,” Alicia answered and gave her a small smile, which to her surprise Diane returned a bit. 

When the elevator doors opened on their level, Alicia and Diane were almost immediately face to face with Will, who pulled Diane in his arms. Alicia couldn’t help but notice that, while Diane had cautiously avoided men on the streets and the police station, she didn’t even flinch or whatsoever when Will embraced her.

“Why didn’t you tell me about the Police? Did they find anything on that bastard?” Will asked Diane after he released her. 

“You had a client meeting, and I just had to give my official statement, and I’d rather not talk about it if it’s alright with you?” 

“Sure.” 

“Alright, I have to go now and prepare for the Orban case, thank you for the help in that by the way,” Alicia said, and Diane was even more grateful for the way Alicia treated her. 

“No problem,” Diane answered and then watched as Alicia disappeared around the corner of the hallway. Making their way to their offices, Diane suddenly remembered that she had no place to stay, she sure as hell wouldn’t go back to her apartment. 

“Will, I know I’m asking a lot of you...but could I- perhaps stay at your place for a night or two?” 

“You actually thought I’d let you stay anywhere else? I already called Simone to buy actual food and set up the spare bedroom.” Will answered simply, and Diane smiled a little, though she hadn't met Simone, Will's housekeeper, that often, she liked the woman very much. She was a little eccentric, but that was just what Will needed and he even considered her as a friend. 

“She was delighted, I imagine, your fridge hasn’t seen actual food in like...ever.” 

“Yeah, she asked me twice if I got the right number and if I really am Will Gardner.” 

Before Diane could answer him, she stopped in her tracks and stared towards her office, for the second time today, she came here to find a more than strange sight before her. 

“Is that Canning?” Diane asked, not really trusting her eyesight. 

“Yes, what the hell is he doing here? I didn’t even know he was here, nobody said anything.” Will told Diane quietly as they approached her office. Upon opening the door, Louis Canning turned around. 

“Your assistant was so kind as to let me wait in here, I’m sure you are surprised what I’m doing here.” 

“You can fucking bet we are,” Will said darkly, he hated Canning with passion since he almost ruined them. 

“Give us one reason why we should listen to anything you tell us?” 

“Because while I might be an asshole...I’m no monster.” 

“What?” Diane asked, not understanding what Canning was implying, throwing a glance at Will told her that he understood as much as she did. 

“I know who attacked you, Diane.” whatever they had expected, this wasn’t it. Diane thought for sure she had misheard him, who the hell could Canning know who raped her? All color drained from her face, and she could feel her heart begin to thump in her chest again. 

“What?...How?” her voice was barely above a whisper, but both men had heard what she had said because of the heavy silence between them. Canning looked Diane in the eyes, and for the first time she had met him, she saw something like...regret? 

“Because I hired him.” 

* * *

Hello dear readers! 

I’m so sorry it took me so long to update again! But life was crazy the last few weeks, and there was so much going on. I had the final exams of my further training, which I passed (Yay :D !) and changed my workplace. So now that’s done, I have more time to write again! 

As a small apology, you get a long chapter with a nice cliffhanger. I hope you liked the chapter! Leave a comment and tell me what you think. :)

A big thank you for every comment, and Kudo, you already left! You don’t know how happy they make me! Thank you, have a wonderful day!

Until next time!


	5. Chapter 5

Diane was sure she had heard him wrong, she couldn't believe it, it couldn't be. Had Canning just said he had hired the man who had raped her? It couldn't be, no, who did something like that? She had always thought Canning was a giant asshole, a person who threw all morals overboard when he was paid the right price, and she loathed him, but sending a man to rape her? Who did something like that? He almost ruined their firm, and now he also tried to destroy her personally? Why? What had she ever done to him?

"What?" she asked her voice barely more than a whisper, Diane's heart was racing in her chest, and her breathing rate went up. "You...hired him?" 

Canning opened his mouth, but before he could even say one word, Will jumped forward and punched him in the face. Canning stumbled backward, but Will had already grabbed him by his collar, whirled him around, and pushed him up against the wall next to the side entrance of Diane's office, so his feet were barely touching the ground. 

"You hired him!? You motherfucking son of a bitch hired him to rape Diane? I swear to god you're going to pay for this! I'll beat that ugly smirk off your face until you can't remember your own name!" Will screamed at him, and his voice shook with fury, and he could barely hold himself back from beating Canning into a pulp. 

"Wait! No! That's not what I did!" Canning shouted back, moving his jaw a bit because of the punch. 

"Will! Will don't, he'll only cause you trouble!" Diane said and held him back from hitting Canning again. She didn't want that man to be able to hurt Will just because of her. Diane did her best to pull Will off him, and reluctantly he finally let go of Canning. 

"Diane, please-" Canning reached out and put his hand on her shoulder, and Diane flinched back. 

"Don't! Don't you dare to touch me! Do you know what you have done? What he did to me? He raped me!" she said, and Will gently laid his arm around her and made her take a few steps back to put more distance between them and Canning, whom he still glared at. 

"I didn't even get a chance to defend myself! I-I had to lay there, unable to move one muscle or say one word, and had to simply endure what he did to me! You- do you know what he did to me? Did you share ideas of what he could do? Whose idea was it to paralyze me? Did you tell him to rape me on my desk? Because you thought it was a nice way to put me in my place? Because I'd remember it every fucking day when I go to work?" 

"Was it his idea to do it without a condom? Or yours? Thought it'd be hilarious if I got pregnant by my rapist, huh? Did you tell him about the other cases, or was it his idea? Just because he wanted to make sure that I'd always be reminded of it whenever I look in the mirror!?" Diane grabbed the collar of her sweater and pulled it down, at the same time ripping the band-aid off covering the bite mark, showing it to Canning. 

It was also the first time Will saw it, and he felt sick, not because the wound itself was that bad, or bloody, but because it showed him another aspect of what pain Diane had to go through. He could make out every tooth, and it told him of the strength he had bitten her with. Will was by no means a medical expert, but he knew that it would leave a scar and that Diane would have to live with that for the rest of her life. 

He wished for nothing more than to get rid of it for her or tell her that it didn't matter to him. That she was still the most beautiful person he knew, that this scar was only the visible evidence of how incredibly strong she was and that he loved her nonetheless, and still more than his own life. 

On the other hand, Canning stared at the wound in shock, real shock, and Will thought that it was probably the first time that he saw Canning show real emotions. Canning went pale and shook his head. 

"Oh my god...please let me explain, I didn't hire him to rape you, I didn't even hire him to hurt you in any way," He said, "Please, just give me one chance to explain myself," Canning said and Will looked down at Diane whom he now almost held in his arms again. Diane fixed the band-aid, ignoring the pain, and her sweater before she looked at Canning. 

"You have one chance. But I warn you if I ever find out you lied to me, I will move heaven and hell to destroy you, and I don't have much left to lose, so you better take this seriously. Who is he?" Diane asked. 

"Thank you. I hired him to steal your keys, or better said to get a mold of your keys so we could make a copy of them. Then his job was to break in here and get the Files of our case against each other from Will's office so I could win. I hired him to break into your house and do this without hurting you or even being seen by you. If I had only had the slightest indication that he would do anything to you, I wouldn't have done it. I thought he was a professional, I knew of him through an old client of mine and thought he could be trusted to do just that and nothing more. I swear I didn't know he planned any of this. When I saw the news I didn't even think it was him, I thought it was just- well, that was until I found the files in my office and I knew that it must have been him who attacked you." Canning explained, unable to even look at Diane.

"You hired him just to get my files on the case?" Will asked in disbelief, he couldn't wrap his head around it. 

"I knew you'd win if I couldn't find a way to look at what you got and what your strategies were. I knew that you were the only ones who had keys to each other's file cabinets, I overheard one of the assistants talking months ago and remembered in case I needed it in the future. That was all I wanted. I never wanted anyone to get hurt, especially you, Diane." 

"You hired a random sociopath to steal some files. I was raped and had to live through a nightmare because you were such a pride fixed wimp you couldn't even lose one case?" Diane said, and for a moment, she felt like laughing out loud at the situation, if not for the fact that she looked at the man who was the reason for what had happened to her. 

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, Diane, really. I never wanted this to happen."

"Great, that makes three of us," she said and sunk down on the chair that had previously been occupied by Canning. 

"I never thought much of you Canning, I always thought you were an asshole that also tried to manipulate people with his health. But even I never thought you could sink so low. Diane had nothing to do with this, and you decided, willingly decided to make her a part of this, and it backfired. I hope you know that it's your fault alone what happened to Diane." Will growled and stared at Canning with hatred in his eyes. 

"Tell me his name...I want to know his name." Diane interfered before Canning could answer Will. 

"His name is Andrew Giddeon," Canning replied, and Diane didn't know what she had expected to feel when she finally knew the name of the man who had almost broken her. But it was just a name, there was no feeling of relief, anger, or fear, no tremendous emotional reaction, it was only a name. But it was a name that Diane would never forget, which she would always associate with the worst day of her life.

"Andrew Giddeon," Diane repeated almost inaudible and then took a deep breath. "I'm willing to not press charges, if, and only if, you tell the Police everything about Andrew Giddeon so they can arrest him. And you will leave us alone, I don't care if you have to move to Alaska to ensure that, you can take out any other firm for all I care, but you will stop trying to destroy our firm." Diane told him, and both men were staring at her in shock. 

"I- I don't expect you to do that. Diane, I came here today knowing full well that it would end my career, and that's a price I'm willing to pay." 

"Good to know, I never said I would stop the prosecutor from pressing charges, I said I won't. And do not mistake this for forgiveness, I won't forgive you...I don't know if I can ever forgive you, because of you, my life is a pile of fragments I don't know if I can ever put back together. I just don't want to see your face ever again once this is done." Diane explained, and Canning nodded. 

"Alright, but there might be a problem. Because even if I tell the Police his name, they won't find him that easily," the smaller man said as he walked over to the sofa in her office, "May I?" Diane nodded while Will was growing impatient. 

"Just sit the fuck down and tell us why they won't find that bastard!" he barked, and Diane, who had turned the chair to face Canning, took his hand in hers. 

"Because he is no normal criminal. Not even I know all about him, all I know is he is an Ex-Navy Seal, one of a kind that is considered specially gifted even under them. He is highly intelligent; even under Seals he was rumored to be in one of their special groups. So special that the Government hid his records and everything, they won't find anything on him because basically, he doesn't exist." Canning told them, and all color drained from Diane's face, and her grasp on Will's hand tightened.

"Oh my god..." 

"You sent a killer machine to simply steal some keys? Are you a fucking idiot!?" Will asked. 

"I didn't know he would do this! We only talked once two months ago, I didn't know he would start thinking like this about Diane or anyone for that matter! If I had known, I would have stopped him, but I can't turn time back, and I have to live with that!" 

"Oh I'm sorry that you have to live with the burden of sending a rapist after me, I can't even imagine what this must be like," Diane said, and for the first time since Canning had revealed what he had done to them, Diane had to fight some tears. 

"Get out," she whisper-yelled at him, and Will immediately went into action and pulled Canning up from the sofa and pushed him out the room, ignoring his apologies. 

"We'll never find him," Diane said quietly as she tried desperately not to cry again. "He'll get away with it." 

"No, Diane, no he won't. I promised you I'd get him and I will, even if it's the last thing I do. We will get him. You and I will get him, and he will pay for what he did to you." Will said, kneeling next to her, taking her hands into his own. 

"He is a- was a Navy Seal, he doesn't exist! How do we prove it was him, even if we should magically manage to arrest him?" 

"Excuse me? Haven't you met the two best lawyers on the planet yet? If they catch him, we will put him behind bars for the rest of his miserable life." Will said and brought her hand to his lips so he could press a gentle kiss on it. 

"I'm scared Will...what if...what if he comes back?...He was trained to fight and survive in a war zone, it's no problem for him to get to me." 

"You are wrong there, Diane, if he wants to get to you then only over my dead body." Will said, stood, and pulled her into another embrace, "I won't let him get near you again," he said quietly. And almost against her will, Diane was strangely impressed or somewhat amazed that without hesitating Will said he would be willing to put himself in between her and a Navy Seal to protect her. 

Then she noticed the red stain on Will's still bandaged hand, "Will! You're bleeding!" Diane said startled, and Will followed her gaze to find that she was right. He had probably torn some of his stitches when he had punched Canning. Before he could say anything, Diane stood and walked over to one of her cabinets and pulled a first aid kit form it. 

"What? Why do you have a first aid kit here?" 

"Because I always knew I'd have to patch you up one day," Diane answered with a smile and proceeded to take his stained bandages off. His hand was still swollen, and two of the stitches had indeed opened and were bleeding, Diane carefully cleaned his hand and then took a clean bandage to wrap it around his hand again. 

"How did this happen again?" she asked quietly as she bandaged him up. 

"I...uh...punched a window, it seems they don't use very stable windows in hospitals anymore." 

"Will...none of it was your fault. None. Look at me," Diane said, and Will looked at her, into her bright blue eyes. "Please don't do something like that again, you already helped me so much, I- without you I couldn't do this Will." 

"I just...I don't know...I'm so angry at that bastard, and at myself, I keep thinking that if only I had insisted on driving you home, or realized that call was a call for help- I just wish I could have done things differently. That I could have saved you." 

"But you can't turn back time, please, he's the only one responsible for what happened to me. And you're at least of all, okay? Do you really think I blame you?" 

"I don't know, I-...maybe." 

"I don't, and I never will," Diane said sincerely as she fixed the bandage and looked at Will. Strangely it did ease some of the guilt he was feeling, and Will felt a strong urge to simply kiss her, tell her he loved her and that he would do anything to protect her. But knowing this certainly wasn't the time, if it would ever come, he hugged her again.

"That helps a lot, thank you," he told her honestly.

"What would I do without you, Will?" Diane mumbled and trying to lift the mood again, Will smiled. 

"First of all, you'd be vainly searching for such a handsome business partner," Will remarked dryly, and despite the situation, Diane had to smile too. Turning his head Will was just in time to see his next client. 

"Damn, there is my next client," he grumbled out, honestly disappointed that he had to let go of her now. Will loved holding her in his arms, no matter if it was in a hug when they won a case or made up after a fight, or on the rare occasion when they danced in one of their offices when nobody else was around. 

He loved the way she smelled, like a summer breeze, warm, flowery, but still fresh and invigorating, and on top of that were her delicate perfumes, she was always surrounded by a well-dosed waft, never too prominent, of some expensive smell. It might sound weird, and he would never tell anybody, but when he met women, he unconsciously searched for one who smelled somewhat familiar to Diane, none of them got close to her, but he still tried. 

"Well then...you better go and make us some money," Diane said, and Will grinned as he let go of her before slightly bowing. 

"I am at your command!" he said, exaggerating, and she playfully swatted his shoulder, before putting the first aid kit back together while Will left her office. 

* * *

The rest of the day went by unspectacular. Like any other workday, Diane was simply trying to work off the paperwork that had piled on her desk. The only thing that was actually different was that Diane, despite being exhausted, continued to work. She didn't want to stop because she was in control here at work. Here behind her desk, she was in her element, and she knew what she had to do to save their firm.

But when she stopped, Diane feared she would go back into this hated state of control loss. Back to her shattered life, she had no idea how to put back together. She didn't want to deal with this, she couldn't, she wanted to focus on the only thing she thought was left in her control, which was her work. 

"Diane?" Will's voice pulled her out of her thoughts over a transcript, and she looked up to see him standing in the door to her office with his coat and briefcase, ready to go home. 

"Yes?" she asked back, her eyes were burning, and she blinked them a couple of times to get a clear view again. 

"I asked you if you are ready to go home?" Will repeated, and worry flickered across his face. Diane looked exhausted, and the bruises and band-aids didn't help at all, when he had first spoken to her, she hadn't even reacted, which encouraged Will that it had been a good idea to leave early, at least for their standards.

"Oh! What? But it's only," Diane looked at her watch, "shortly after seven." she added surprised. 

"Yes, I know, but we are still going home now. You were released from the hospital just this morning, and you look exhausted. You need time to recover from what that bastard injected you, that was some pretty heavy stuff. Give yourself some time." Will said, and his voice left no room for arguments. And usually, Diane would have argued with him, but she knew he was right, and she _was_ exhausted.

"Alright, alright," she mumbled and gathered her belongings before walking up to him. Together they went down to his car, and Will drove them to his apartment while they talked about his client meeting like nothing had ever happened, and Diane couldn't feel better. Talking to Will had always been easy, no matter what, they could still talk, and Diane only realized now what a great gift this was. 

When they finally arrived at his place, Diane already had to force her eyes to stay open and fight off her tiredness. Luckily his apartment building had an elevator that took them up to his loft-style apartment, to which she always referred to as his 'bachelor cave' since the first time she had been here. Upon walking further into the apartment, both were surprised to find a note leaning against a vase of white lilies, Diane's absolute favorite.

Will took the note and read it out loud: _"You told me once that Diane likes lilies, I watched the news after you called, and thought she might like something nice in this soulless bachelor cave of yours. I also made some ratatouille for you, it's in the oven, I already set the temperature, so even you can't ruin it, just set the time for 15 minutes. I'll see you next week and give Diane a hug. Love, Simone."_

Once again, Will wondered what he had done to deserve Simone, and he, not for the first time, thanked the gods that Simone had shown up when he had looked for a housekeeper. At first, he had thought she was raising money, dressed in what he was later told was fashion, but looked like rags to him, she then had pulled out a crumpled-up print of his online ad and told him she was his new housekeeper. 

Over the years, a strange friendship and formed between them and Will would rather sell his beloved apartment then letting her go. Simone was also one of the very few people; in fact, only her, his sister Audrey and his best friend Henry, who actually knew that he was in love with Diane. She also knew too much about him for Will to let her go, and Simone regularly reminded him of that.

"She really is a godsend," Diane said, looking at the lilies with a smile, thinking about the eccentric woman and Will sighed. 

"If you only knew," he muttered under his breath as he walked to the oven to finish their Dinner. 

"Would you mind me taking a shower?" Diane asked. 

"Of course not, go ahead, if you need some body-wash or shampoo, there are a couple of one in the counter under the sink," Will said, but Diane shook her head with a smile.

"Thank you, but I don't need your bimbo cleaning utensils. Kalinda really thinks of everything, she packed some of mine," Diane said and grabbed her bag and walked towards his bathroom. 

When she walked inside the bathroom, Diane locked the door, put her bag on the floor, and searched for everything she needed. And as she did so, a sudden thought invaded her mind, why had Will told Simone she liked lilies? And when had he told her? How come Simone had remembered? Diane couldn't help but ask herself. But honestly, she thought it was a lovely gesture, and it showed her once again what a wonderful friendship they had. 

Shaking her head, Diane placed her things in the shower and then wanted to undress, but just at that moment, she caught her reflection in the large mirror and stopped in her tracks. In an instant, Diane's heart was thumping in her chest, and blood was rushing in her ears as she stared at herself, images of rape flashed through her mind and when she squeezed her eyes shut she thought she could feel his hands on her. 

Whirling around and opening her eyes in a panic, she only saw the empty room behind her. She was alone, nobody was here. Shuddering and trying once again to get her breathing and heart rate under control again, Diane went to the closet and grabbed a large towel, which she hung over the mirror. Only when she couldn't see her reflection any longer, Diane was able to undress and take a shower. 

Despite wanting nothing more than a shower to finally feel clean again, once she stood under the water of Will's fancy rain shower head, it didn't feel like getting clean. It didn't even feel like her body, Diane had been proud to say she loved her body, from her still firm breasts, over the small rhombus-shaped birthmark on her right hip to the well-trimmed pubes and the scar on her knee she got when she smashed her kneecap nearly twenty years ago. But now it felt strange to her like this wasn't her body anymore.

Nearly as bad was that, no matter how long Diane scrubbed her skin, or how hot she turned the shower, she didn't feel clean. She could still feel his hands on her; it was like his touch had burned itself into her skin so she couldn't get rid of it no matter what she did. And in her desperation and frustration, tears mingled with the water running down her face, as she pressed a hand to her mouth so no sound would escape. 

"Diane? Dinner is ready, are you okay?" Will's voice was muffled due to the closed door and the running shower, but Diane still heard him. But unknown to her, almost half an hour had passed, which had Will worry about her. She ran her hands over her face and brushed her hair back, trying to compose herself.

"Yes! I'm fine, I'll be right there," she called back and then turned the shower off. She wrapped a towel around herself and then took a smaller one to dry her hair a little as she stepped outside the shower. She opened one of the windows to let the steam out and took off the towel she had used to cover the mirror once she was dressed in a pair of pajamas, a white long sleeve, and some light cotton flannel pants. Diane actually wondered if Kalinda knew, that this so 'not Diane' piece, as Will had once called it, was one of her favorite. 

Once she stepped outside the bathroom and walked back into his living room, she saw Will at the dinner table and joined him. As Diane forced herself to eat something, she suddenly caught Will smiling at her. 

"Why are you smiling?" 

"Huh?" Will asked as he was pulled out of his thoughts. 

"You're smiling, I asked you why," Diane said with a small smile of her own. 

"I just remembered the first time I saw you in this pajama. And how surprised I was to see you wearing something so- classic. I thought you'd only own silk ones." Will explained, and also Diane had to smile at the memory. Only a year into their partnership, he had shown up at her door at one in the morning, frustrated that he had lost a class action against some asshole firm. It had been one of the moments that had forged their beautiful friendship. 

"Yeah, you called it 'not Diane like'," she said, and he nodded. 

The two of them finished their Dinner, and when they put their things away, Will turned to Diane. "Do you want to go to bed?"

Diane was exhausted and wanted to sleep, but at the same time, she didn't want to be alone right now. And this feeling was more substantial than the need for sleep.

"I don't know, it's still pretty early, maybe there's a good movie we could watch?" she asked, and Will nodded. 

"Fine by me." only a couple of minutes later, they sat on his couch and watched some old Western, Will's arm had almost automatically laid over her shoulders. Diane found herself leaning more against him with each passing minute. Her eyelids also started drooping as her tiredness finally caught up with Diane. 

"You know you can stay as long as you need, right?" Will said calmly, his hand had begun to stroke over her arm on its own as well. 

"Yes, I know," mumbled Diane fighting a yawn and closing her eyes, finally losing the fight she had fought the whole day. There was a long silence in which Will watched the movie, not knowing Diane had already fallen asleep against his shoulder.

"Diane?" he looked down when there was no response and smiled when he realized she had fallen asleep. He turned the TV off and sat there for a moment, his mind once again torturing him with the possibility that this could be a regular night for them. With a sigh, Will pushed those thoughts aside and carefully lifted Diane into his arms, a little surprised how light she actually was. 

Unconsciously Diane shifted closer to him as Will carried her to the guest bedroom, and gently laid her down on the bed. He covered with a blanket and then leaned down to press a light kiss against her forehead. 

"I love you, Diane, and nothing will ever change that." with that, Will left the room and returned to his own empty and cold bed.

On a dark rooftop in the distance, a man smashed his binoculars in rage.

* * *

Hello my dear readers! 

I'm back with a new chapter, and I hope you like the way this story unfolds! I try to keep the chapters on a medium length, and they just keep getting longer! Hope you don't mind! :)

A few notifications as I forgot to mention this earlier. 

They are all in their mid-forties here, with Diane only a year or so older.

I also added Simone Will's housekeeper, who is basically Marissa but older and looks like Helena Bonham-Carter, just google her name and outfits and whatever you think looks the weirdest his how Simone looks. :D

Also, Henry Baxter, Will's Judge buddy, never put these kids into prison to make money. He is cool in this story, I mean, Will has to have some buddy too!

Please leave a comment and tell me what you think! 

Thank you again for all the amazing responses I got for the last chapter!

Until next time!


	6. Chapter 6

Canning had been right; even though he had told the police everything he knew about Andrew Giddeon, the police hadn't been able to find him, or anyone else who might know something about him, in the last months. Indeed it was like he was a ghost, but Diane had been prepared for that, which, she didn't like to admit, was more challenging than she thought. 

Whenever Diane stepped outside, she checked the faces of the men, because even though she had never really seen Gideon's face, they had shown her a photo of him at his time with the Seals, which already was a few years ago but still better than nothing. When she had imagined his face, and she had, because she had to know what despicable being would do something like that, Diane had certainly not imagined this. 

Andrew Giddeon was a good looking man who smiled brightly into the camera. He had short, dark brown hair and sharp features, a light stubble covered his jaw, his nose was a little crooked, it looked like it had been broken a few times. His eyes were of a deep brown color, almost black, and a shiver down her spine even when it was only a picture Diane looked at. 

Even though her rapist was still somewhere out there, Diane did her best to get her life back; she had to get her life back, or else he would have won, and that was something Diane couldn't allow. She would not back down because of what happened, she wanted to feel like herself again, and she had to move forward for that. A week after Diane was released from the hospital, she had moved back into her apartment, even though she still hadn't taken one step insider her office. The door was firmly locked, and Will had moved every important thing from it to her makeshift office in the guest bedroom. 

Diane had also gone to the therapist that the nurse had told her about. Dr. Lindstrom really did help her a great deal. He got her to admit that though she had been a victim of rape, that she had survived the encounter, and made her see that she was a survivor now, he showed her that she wasn't pathetic for how she felt. That what she was feeling was normal and that feeling alright one day, and not okay on the other, was also fine; there was no mandatory timeline in which she had to feel a certain way or be over what had happened. 

In the last four months, Diane finally felt like she was slowly getting her life back. Even their firm was doing better; both Diane and Canning had stayed true to their word, she hadn't pressed charges against him, and Canning, though facing charges by the state attorney's office, had given his cases away and would leave Chicago. But even if Canning hadn't left his business in Chicago, their firm was doing better because many other firms, especially ones led by women, were impressed with how Diane had dealt with the situation. 

This had lead to more cases and even more wins. Diane and Will, regarding their firm, were finally able to breathe again. In the next few days, they would be able to finally get rid of Hayden. It seemed like everything was slowly going back to normal.

When Diane woke up this Friday morning, she would've loved to stay in bed. Today was just one of those days, and even though she had slept almost six hours, which was long for her now, she was just not feeling good today. She stretched a bit and then got up, it was half-past six, and the sun was just beginning to rise over the city, and the faint sunbeams danced through the first snowflakes falling from the sky. Diane loved the snow, mostly when she could stay in and just enjoy the scenery, though today was not one of those days. 

Smiling a little, she went to take a shower. Once she had put on her outfit of the day, black high cut slacks and a cream-colored turtleneck, and to complement the outfit, she chose the modest yet beautiful necklace that was a birthday present from Will. It was a golden necklace with some Topaz drops, and three topaz stones on either side of the drops ebbed in the chain. 

When Diane was dressed, she went downstairs to get a cup of coffee, but she only made it halfway to the kitchen when somebody rang the doorbell. Frowning, Diane glanced at her watch. It was shortly after seven, who could that be? She went to get the door and had to smile when she saw who it was. 

"Good morning, Diane," Will said once the door opened. Even in his coat, he looked uncomfortable because he, unlike her, hated the snow. Diane always teased him for that, but she decided to wait until he was inside when she saw the bag from her favorite bakery. But to her own surprise, she noticed something else when she looked at her partner, he looked very handsome with fresh snowflakes in his hair. 

"Good morning, what are you doing here, Will?" she asked, shaking off the thought of his good looks as she stepped aside to let him in. 

"Do I need a specific reason to surprise you with fresh baked goods?" he answered as he got out of his coat and shook his head to get rid of the hated snow in his hair. 

"Normally, no, but at this hour, it's even unusual for you," Diane said with a smile and took the paper bag from him before the two made their way to her kitchen. "So? Why did you come over?" 

"I have no reason, I just- I thought you'd like to have breakfast together," Will said, and though he tried to play it off, Diane thought she heard a bit of a mix of worry and embarrassment in his voice. Even though they had breakfast together a million times, suddenly there was something there that hadn't been there before. Diane felt another smile coming to her lips almost automatically, and then an all too familiar warmth spread through her body. One she had felt rather often around Will lately.

Damn it, she was officially mental. Was she really starting to feel something for Will? In the last months, they had grown even closer, spent almost every day together, he was there for her day and night, and she wouldn't have made it this far without him by her side. 

In the last two weeks or so, she had noticed a change. Whenever Will was not around, she started to miss him. She missed him by her side, the conversations with him because he was the only one she could really talk to. Whenever he was with her, Diane felt happier than she had in months, almost like herself again, Will understood her like no one else, and she felt safe with him.

She quickly shook off these thoughts; it was impossible and insane. She had to bury those thoughts and feelings, Will was her best friend; he would never feel the same way for her. And who would want her now? Almost all her physical wounds had healed, except for one, and subconsciously her hand laid on the bite-wound. She could almost feel the scars through the fabric of her pullover. 

But it was a different story with the wounds one couldn't see. It had taken Diane this long to be able to look at her reflection in the mirror; she had developed a sleeping disorder; she was uncomfortable in the presence of men she didn't know and almost developed an OCD when it came to locking the door. Yes, who wouldn't love to be with her? 

"Di?" Will's voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and Diane shook her head to get rid of these thoughts. He had made some coffee for them and held out a mug to her. 

"Sorry I- was thinking about the Nolan case." She said as they sat down at her kitchen isle; one look at him told Diane that Will knew she hadn't thought about their work, but he also knew that she didn't want to talk about it now, so he let her be. Well almost. 

"How long did you sleep tonight?" Will asked, and Diane sighed and ran her right hand through her hair. 

"Almost six hours," she mumbled and took a sip of her coffee. 

"Really?" 

"Well, yeah, in total," Diane said quietly as she bit into the croissant, Will shook his head, but he knew better than to tell her it wasn't a good amount of sleep. Diane knew that herself. 

"So what are your plans for Christmas this year?" he asked, and Diane blinked at him. 

"My plans?" she had honestly not thought about it at all, even though it was only two weeks away. There had been so much going on that she forgot. "Well, I have no idea," she answered, and Will nodded. 

"Why are you asking?" 

"Well, I wanted to ask if you'd like to spend it together? Sarah is celebrating with her in-laws in Alaska, and Audrey is in Europe on a self-discovery trip. So I thought it would be nice to spend it together and not alone." he asked, and back was that warm feeling. 

"Of course, but only if you promise me you won't cook anything!" Diane told him, and both thought of the incident two years ago when Will had managed to give half the senior partners food poisoning with his cookies. 

"I apologized at least a thousand times, and I kept my promise to never even attempt to bake again." Will defended himself, and Diane laughed. Out of nowhere, he changed the subject.

"Have they- have they called you about him lately?" Diane didn't have to ask who he meant, and her laughter died down immediately. The former relaxing and pleasant atmosphere turned almost uncomfortably serious.

She shook her head and sighed, "No, I haven't heard from anyone in weeks. I doubt that I am their top priority. They found no leads and know they won't find anything else. They know they won't find him unless he makes a big mistake." Diane answered and noticed Will's clench his fists, her eyes drawn to the faint scars she could see from the hospital's window incident.

"That's no excuse to practically stop searching all together!" he grumbled out, and Diane placed her hand on his. 

"They haven't stopped, but what do you want them to do with what little they have? And even if there was more on him, he knows how to avoid the law." with that, Diane glanced at her watch and stood. She didn't want to talk about it now because deep inside, she wanted them to catch him, but Diane was a rational person, she knew there was a big chance that would never happen, and if that was the case, she didn't want to get her hopes up.

"We have to go," she added and stood up. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to upset you, Di," Will said as he got up himself, but Diane flashed him a forced smile. 

"You didn't, Will. Just give me a second to get ready. I'll hurry," she said, hoping he didn't notice the fake smile and disappeared up the stairs. 

Will could have hit himself with how stupid he'd been. Why did he always have to ruin things? Couldn't he once shut up at the right moment? 

* * *

The ride to work in his car was full of conversation, albeit they both avoided tricky subjects and mostly talked about work related stuff to keep the mood light. Once at the office, both were awaited by the usual paperwork. However, Will was expected at court for a motion hearing, and ahead of Diane lay half a day of the beloved part of her job before she had her appointment with Dr. Lindstrom in the afternoon. 

When her phone rang, Diane was so busy with her work she didn't even look up to see who was calling but kept her eyes on the document in front of her. 

"Diane Lockhart?" 

"Diane? This is Detective Sheridan," when she heard the voice of the female Detective, Diane sat up straighter and took her glasses off. 

"Hello Detective, what can I do for you?" Diane asked, not able to keep the surprise out of her voice; her talk with Will hadn't exactly increased her hope of them finding a lead on her rapist.

"At the moment, you can just listen, I don't have much time. My Captain just came from a meeting with the Commissioner and a high ranked FBI Agent. He then told us to hold your case on ice, we have an official order to stop investigating, and almost everything we already had was confiscated by two men that also looked every FBI like. It turns out that after Giddeon left the Seals, he was recruited by the CIA, though I don't know if he is still with them or also left. My guess is that they want to cover up the fact that one of the deadliest men in this country is a psychotic rapist." 

"Oh my god, I can't believe it, a-are, you sure?" Diane managed to say, her mind not fully processing yet what the Detective had told her.

"Well, not one hundred percent, but I'll find out more. The thing is, I think they'll try to make your case disappear. But I won't stop looking for him. I promised you I'd find him and I'll keep my word, the only problem is that now I can't do that officially. Luckily I made a copy of everything we had, and just to be on the save side, I will give you a copy of everything just in case. On the card I gave you is also my personal phone number; we'll stay in touch over that, okay?" then the Detective stopped, and Diane heard other voices in the background. 

"I have to go. I'll call again when I find something new." 

"Thank you, Detective, for not giving up," Diane said quickly; she really wanted the woman to know that she was thankful for what she was doing, especially now as she was probably risking her own career. 

"Don't mention it, it's my job, Goodbye." with the Detective hung up, and Diane stared at her phone for a while. 

This was a nightmare. Of course, it wasn't enough that her rapist was an Ex-Seal. No, he also had to be involved with the CIA, apparently it hadn't been hard enough to find him before. It wasn't like she needed closure or something. 

Diane ran her hand through her hair, and lazily threw her glasses on her desk. 

"Bad news?" a voice suddenly asked from her side entrance, and Diane looked up to see Kalinda standing in her doorway. 

"Apparently, Giddeon isn't only an Ex Seal. He is also a CIA Agent, isn't that great? And unofficially, my case was closed. The only one working on it is one Detective," she said and swallowed down a lump in her throat. 

"What?! They won't continue to investigate?" Kalinda asked outrageous as she stepped further inside the office and closed the door behind her. The blonde shook her head. 

"Yeah...officially, they'll probably tell me they have no leads and didn't find anything new, but in reality, nobody is searching for him anymore." 

"Those fucking assholes," the Investigator cursed as she sunk down in one of the chairs in front of her boss's desk. She then couldn't help but study Diane closely. She hadn't seen her this way since the day Canning told her the name of her rapist and that he had hired him. 

"When does this finally stop? I just- I want this to end. Why is there always coming more that makes everything more complicated? I'm tired, Kalinda, I'm tired of checking the face of every man on the street. I want to sleep through the night again without waking up in fear he's back in my house. I don't want to check every lock in the house anymore, I want to look at the mirror for more than a minute, I want to feel like myself again...I want my life back...but I never fully will if he is out there." Diane confessed. 

"Diane, they might have stopped looking for him, but we certainly won't! We won't give up that easily."

"Maybe, but we haven't found out more than them." even though Kalinda didn't like to admit it, but Diane was right. They hadn't been able to find out more than the police, and that was something she took personally. 

"At least we won't give up." The Investigator said, then she watched Diane closely as she thought about her next words. "Have you seen Will's latest...companion yesterday?" Kalinda said, Diane froze upon her words, and it felt like she had swallowed a weight. Usually, they'd joke about it, rate them, but now Diane felt like throwing something through her office.

"What? No sarcastic joke?" Kalinda asked when she saw Diane's reaction. 

"I sadly didn't see her. It's more fun if I saw them," she answered, trying to sound normal, but when she faced Kalinda and saw the growing smirk, she knew she was in trouble. Apart from growing even closer to Will, she had also grown close to Kalinda. They realized that even though they were different, they also had a lot in common and became friends. 

"Or it might be because you came to like Will?" she could feel who her features slipped, and her heart began to race in her chest, was she this obvious? Did others know as well? What were they thinking of her? What if they believed the lingering rumor the whole thing had been staged?

"What do you mean? No- I just-" Diane stammered, but Kalinda quickly spoke. 

"Diane, calm down, I'm your Investigator. I notice things, and I kinda bluffed but judging your reaction I was right," she said, and she smiled, which changed once she saw the look on Diane's face. 

"God, that's pathetic. What do you think people would say if they knew? Not to mention Will, I'd have to leave this firm. I couldn't look at him," Diane said, but Kalinda shook her head.

"Diane, don't, why would you care what other people think? Do you think because of what happened that you don't deserve happiness and have to be alone for the rest of your life?"

"Yes, who wouldn't want to be with me? I mean, I can look in the mirror again, what an accomplishment," Diane scoffed. 

"Will would," Kalinda said seriously.

"Kalinda, I always liked you and in the last months even more so, and I consider you a good friend. You have done so much for me, and I could never be more thankful. So please don't play with my feelings." Diane said and stood up. She grabbed her coat and her briefcase and was on her way out. 

"Diane, Diane, wait, I didn't mean it that way!" Kalinda said, but Diane was already out the door and on the way to the elevators. Well, that backfired a big way, Kalinda thought. She expected a reaction from Diane, but not quite this way. She thought it might be too early, but since she noticed that Diane might feel something for Will, based on her behavior around him, she made it her personal goal to make these two realize they belonged together. 

Sighing, Kalinda got up and left Diane's office. 

* * *

  
Diane knew she was too early when she rang the bell, but only by fifteen minutes or so; she hoped that Dr. Lindstrom would let her in any way. When he opened the door, she saw his surprise. 

"Diane, I didn't expect you until two," he said but stepped aside to let her into his practice. 

"I know, I'm sorry, but I- didn't know what else to do. I hope that's okay." Diane said as they stepped inside the therapy room. 

"No, everything's alright, please take a seat." Dr. Lindstrom said with his calming smile, and they both sat down in the comfortable armchairs in front of his desk. "How are you doing, Diane? You seem a little shaken." she took a deep breath and told him about the call she received from Detective Sheridan and how she felt about the high chance that the man who had raped her would never be caught. 

"I'm a realist, I knew this was a chance, a big one even...why- why does it still hurt? Why do I feel like I've been run over by a bus?" she asked and looked at him. 

"Diane, you might be a realist, but that doesn't mean you don't want or don't deserve justice. You're a lawyer; you know what could have happened, what could be done, and even though you knew there was a chance he wouldn't be found, you prepared to fight and get justice. That's normal and okay. You have every right to be angry and hurt that the people who should do everything to find the man who raped you won't do so." 

"I just don't want to accept this so easily...but do I have to?" 

"I hope you understand that it's not easy for me to say this, it could be a possibility you have to accept it, but at this point and knowing you still have your own little group, I say, no, you don't have to accept it." Dr. Lindstrom said with a small encouraging smile. 

Then they talked about her general process and how she was sleeping and everything else. But the whole time, her growing feelings for her best friend lingered in the back of her mind, so much that Dr. Lindstrom seemed to notice something was going on in her head. When the regular part of her therapy was over, and only a few minutes left, he decided to speak up. 

"Is there anything else you'd like to share, Diane?" he asked, and for a moment, Diane was tempted to say no and just leave. She was still uncomfortable voicing her thoughts and feelings. 

"I...I feel a little…I mean, I just want to know-" she took a deep breath, "What if I feel-…attracted to a man?" Diane asked quietly and was almost unable to look her therapist in the eyes, thinking he would not understand her, tell her she was crazy, that if she even thought about something like this, then maybe the rape couldn't have been that bad.

"Well, I hope you don't feel pressured into these feelings, Diane. You have enough time; you can do things at your own pace. But I think it's a good sign." he answered.

"I'm not crazy for feeling like this?" Diane asked. 

"God no, Diane. Like I said, you set the pace. If you feel this way, then there is nothing wrong with it. Everyone who went through the same you did feels differently; they handle things differently. Like with everything else, there is no mandatory timeline Diane. Everything is okay as long as you set the pace. If you feel like you should do something because others might think it the right way to deal with the situation, please take a step back and think about it: Am I doing this because I want to? Or because I think others expect it of me?" 

"Well, it's not like I don't know him or want to sleep with him or anything I just...I feel so comfortable in his presence, more than ever. When I'm with him...I feel like myself again...for a while, there is this blissful time of not thinking about it, I feel good. But I also fear that if I tell... I'll destroy everything, our friendship, our partnership-" too late, Diane realized she might have said too much. 

"I hope I don't overstep boundaries if I tell you I already thought the man might be Will. Even when I only saw you a few times together, I could see you are close and saw how comfortable you are in his presence. There is nothing wrong with the way you feel. 

"No, I don't think so; I mean, who falls in love with their best friend and business partner after getting raped?" 

"You'd be surprised. It's more likely to feel more for people you already knew than for people you just get to know. You know, Will, you trust him." 

"And I should simply tell him I like him?" 

"You can do everything as long as you feel comfortable. You don't have to reveal your feelings right now. It's entirely your decision Diane," Dr. Lindstrom told her and then glanced at his watch. 

"Our time is up, I'll see you next week. But if there is anything else you can always call. Have a nice weekend." he said, and Diane nodded before she got up. 

"Thank you, Dr. Lindstrom." with that, she walked out of his practice and took a deep breath once she stood outside. She needed a drink, a strong one. Well it might be a little early for a strong drink, but a glass of wine couldn't hurt. She knew there was a nice bar not far from here and decided to take a walk. Should she really tell Will? No, it was ridiculous and would never work. She just had to get over it. 

When Diane reached the bar, her feet were freezing, and she was glad to be out of the snow. It seemed she wasn't the only one who had the idea to get a small drink, the bar was full of people, and it took her a while to get through to the bar, and she barely managed to get on a barstool. 

"One glass of your Cabernet Sauvignon, please," she said once the young bartender came over to her corner. Only a few moments later, she got her wine and took a sip, savoring the taste in her mouth for a couple of seconds before she swallowed the full bodied liquid down. For the first time today, Diane could just let go and breathe through, so much had happened today. 

"Excuse me, Ma'am?" Diane was pulled out of her thoughts when the bartender tried to get her attention. She couldn't even tell how long she sat there, her glass was almost empty. 

"Yes?" she asked, and the young man gave her a small smile as he slid another glass of wine towards her, this time white.

"This glass is from the gentleman-" he turned towards the other end of the bar, but he paused when there was nobody, at least no man by himself. "Huh, well, this is for you," he said and left. Diane stared at the glass and took another look around the bar but saw nobody familiar or anybody who paid her any attention. Something in the back of her mind was alerted, and the small hairs in her neck stood as she felt her heart beating faster in her chest. 

Then her phone began to ring, and when Diane looked at the display, she saw it was an unknown number. Debating for a moment whether or not to answer, Diane decided to take the call.

"Diane Lockhart?" she said, and for a moment, there was nothing. Her heart was racing now and she could feel her palms getting sweaty. 

"I miss you so much, Darling. So, so, much...and you smell perfect today, Guerlain, it's your favorite, isn't it?" 

Diane knew this voice. She knew it because she would never forget it. It belonged to Andrew Giddeon. She couldn't speak, she couldn't think as fear overwhelmed her, blood rushed in her ears as she stumbled from the barstool and turned around her eyes scanned the room again and again, but she couldn't see him. 

"You won't see me, but I see you." 

Her breathing rate went up, she could feel the panic, she had to get out of here, but somewhere out there was Giddeon. Diane stumbled towards the restrooms' direction and could only hear his last words before she hung up. 

"Wait right there for me, Darling." she entered the woman's restroom and quickly hid in a cabin, which she locked and dialed Will's number. 

"Hi, Diane,"

"Will...Will he's here…Giddeon is here," she said, her voice trembling and full of panic. Will understood in an instant and jumped up. 

"Where are you? Tell me where you are, Diane?"

"The Smith's Bar, 34 Warren's Street near Dr. Lindstrom… I'm hiding in the restroom, Will, please hurry."

"I'll call the police, and I'm on my way, Diane, okay? Stay where you are-" 

"Will I-" but Diane stopped talking and held her breath when she heard how the door to the restroom opened and closed. Then she heard it, slow steps coming closer, and then the person started whistling, but not any song, it was the jingle he had hummed as he had raped her.

She hung up and pressed her hands to her mouth to stop any sound from escaping as her tormentor slowly walked towards her hiding place.

* * *

Hello dear readers!   
I'm so sorry for the long wait, but it turns out my new job is worse than my old one, and everything was a bit chaotic.   
So now there is also a little spark of love in Diane for Will, but we're still not quite there yet. Also, our bad guy is always right around the corner and ready to ruin everything. But will he succeed?  
Well, I still hope you like the new chapter and would be so kind as to leave me a comment. I'd also like to thank you for the wonderful comments I received for the last chapter, you guys are simply amazing, and I couldn't be happier that you like my story! Thank you very much and until next time!


	7. Chapter 7

Diane held her breath as she saw the feet stop in front of her cubicle, her heart was almost jumping out of her chest, and she was sure he could hear it beating against her ribcage. 

“I just couldn’t help myself when I saw you, Diane. I had to be close to you again, you look so beautiful. I never wanted someone like I want you, I thought it would go away once I had you, but it just grew stronger. You’re mine Diane, I love you. Every time I watch you, these feelings grow...do you still think of me? When you looked out the window today, were you thinking of me? Answer me, Diane.” but she made no sound. Instead, she pressed herself as close to the wall as she could, her eyes fixed on the pair of boots, looking out for any movement, but Giddeon just stood there. 

“Will can’t protect you, Diane, nobody can, you belong to me, and I will have you-” at that moment, the door to the woman’s restroom opened. 

“What the-? Hey Mister, that’s the wrong room!” the voice sounded like it belonged to a young woman, and Diane wanted to scream, tell her to get help or anything, but the fear and panic had paralyzed her. She couldn’t move one millimeter, couldn’t talk.

“What is going on here?” the woman asked, and Diane heard the suspicion in her voice like she knew something about Giddeon wasn’t right. And he noticed too. 

In the next moment, his boots disappeared, “I will-” but the woman had no time to say anything else. Diane heard a strangled cry followed by a loud thud and the sound of a falling body. Nausea washed over her, and Diane thought he would break down the door and take her, but he didn’t. 

Diane still couldn’t move, her knees gave in, and with tears streaming down her face, she slid to the ground. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t think, she couldn’t talk, the panic had laid over her body like a blanket, it didn’t feel like her body as she squatted in the corner. What had he done to that woman? Was she still alive? What if he had murdered her? What if she was to blame for another woman’s death?

She had no idea how long she was sitting there, but suddenly she heard loud noises, and the door to the restroom flew open. 

“Joe, Call a bus! Ma’am? Ma’am, can you hear me? Hello? She’s bleeding from a head wound- hey, can you hear me? You were attacked, an ambulance is on its way, don’t worry, stay still.” a man said who was probably a police officer, as Diane could make out the cracks and fuzzy radio messages coming from their radios as one stayed with the woman. At the same time, the other one called an ambulance and kept the people in the bar from forming a crowd.

Diane was still unable to make a sound; her whole body was shaking as her thoughts centered around what Giddeon had told her. He got so close to her that he had smelled her perfume in a crowded bar and she hadn’t noticed him, had no idea that he was next to her, the man who had almost ruined her life and apparently developed an obsession with her. 

Giddeon had seen her this morning, how long had he watched her? For four months, she tried to convince herself that her rapist was gone, but Giddeon had stayed close to her, had watched her. What else had he done? What if she had unknowingly interacted with him? It would have been easy for him to disguise himself to fool her.

“No, you don’t understand me! I have to see her; she’s my boss!” the voice of Kalinda pulled Diane out of her thoughts. “Wait...that’s not my boss, that’s not the woman that was in danger. Is anyone else in here?”

“No- we thought this was the woman the call was about. We haven’t searched the room.” 

“You didn’t?” Diane heard that Kalinda was angry but holding back, “Diane?” she called out, and finally when Diane opened her mouth, a quiet word escaped her.

“Here,” she said, doubting that Kalinda had heard her, but then her high-heeled boots appeared in front of the cubicle door. 

“I will open the door, okay?”

“Yes,” Diane answered, and a short moment later, the door was opened and Kalinda, having prepared for the worst, released a quick breath when she saw Diane crouching in the corner of the cubicle, visibly shaken but apparently unharmed.

“Are you okay, Diane?” she asked and knelt down in front of her. 

“I don’t know…” she whispered, and in the next moment, Kalinda wrapped her arms around her, and Diane broke down in sobs. 

“It’s okay he’s gone, Diane. You’re safe now.” Kalinda murmured and held Diane until she had calmed down again. “Come on, let’s get you out of here.” she then helped Diane stand up and walked her out of the cubicle. Diane hadn’t even heard how the paramedics had arrived and were now loading the young woman on a gurney. 

“What happened to her? How is she doing?” Diane asked, wiping tears off her face. One of the paramedics looked at her and seemed to think about whether or not to tell her. “Please, she saved my life.” 

“She has a mild concussion, she’s going to be okay, but we’ll take her with us just to be sure.” the paramedic answered before they took the woman to the hospital. Taking a deep, shaky breath, Diane leaned against the counter. 

“What happened, Diane?” Kalinda asked, and the police officer who had arrived first walked over to them. 

“I’d also like to know this,” he said calmly, and though he kept his distance and was no threat to her, Diane shifted away from him. 

“Giddeon followed me here-”

“You know the man?” the officer interrupted her, and Diane swallowed. 

“Yes, he- raped me four months ago,” she told him before she continued. “He…bought me a drink but disappeared before the bartender could bring it to me. I- had a strange feeling and then he called me, he told me he was watching me and that he had been close to me...I panicked and hid in here, but he followed me. Giddeon talked to me...he said I belong to him and that he loved me and watched me. I thought he would break the door down when that woman came in...at first she just told him he was in the wrong room, but then she noticed something was not alright.” Diane told them and wrapped her arms around herself in an attempt to calm herself down. 

“I wanted to warn her...but I couldn’t. I was paralyzed with fear. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t talk. Then I heard how Giddeon hit her, I think...I wanted to help, but I was so scared he was still there,” Diane continued. 

“But why didn’t you say something when my colleague and I arrived?” the officer asked.

“You don’t know what he has done to me, what he is capable of...I was scared out of my mind.”

“Can you give us a description of him?” 

“I have a picture of him on my phone,” Kalinda interfered and pulled her phone from her pocket. 

“Could I borrow it for a second to show the picture to the bartender?” the young man asked, and Kalinda nodded before she handed him the phone. With a short nod to them, the officer walked away and left the two of them alone.

“How did you know what happened?” Diane asked and looked at Kalinda. 

“Will called; he was in total panic but knew I was out investigating close by. So I immediately packed my things and came here, you really scared us...I thought he might have taken you or worse.” Kalinda confessed.

“I was sure he would take me...he watched me Kalinda...he knew what I was doing today, he knew I looked out the window after I woke up today and asked me if I was thinking about him...he said he will get me.” 

“Diane, we won’t let that happen!” but Diane shook her head. 

“And what do you want to do?” she asked, but before Kalinda could answer, they heard a familiar voice. 

“Let me through! I have to see her!” in the next moment, Will appeared in the doorway, an angry looking police man behind him. But the second Will saw Diane, he hurried towards her and wrapped his arms around Diane in a tight but protective hug. 

“Thank god you’re okay,” Will murmured into her hair while Diane buried her face in his chest, and Kalinda told the officer it was okay and that Will was a good friend.

“He follows me, Will...he watches me.” Will pulled her even closer against him. He wanted to tell her everything would be alright, that Giddeon wouldn’t get to her, that he was gone even. But this incident told them that it would be a lie, that Giddeon could get to Diane, that he was still around and waiting for his chance. 

“I know...but we will find a way to catch him, Diane. Come on, let’s get you home.”

“I don’t want to be alone,” she said, and Will pressed a kiss to her hairline. 

“I wouldn’t leave you alone for anything in the world.” once the police told her she was free to go, Will drove her home and made her a cup of tea as Diane put on some comfortable clothes. When she returned downstairs, Will waited on her couch with the tea, and she gave him a small, thankful smile as she sat down next to him. 

“The police called me today,” Diane said after a couple of moments of silence, remembering that Will didn’t know. 

“What? And what did they say? That they found something?” she heard the anger in his voice. She knew that after today he wanted them to find Giddeon, and for a moment, she didn’t know if she should tell Will; he would be furious. 

“Well, actually, it was only Detective Sheridan. She told me that the FBI showed up and confessed the files and everything else they found out. Officially they will tell me they found nothing, but unofficially they won’t be investigating anymore.” 

“What? You can’t be serious?” Will asked, shocked. Diane saw that, much like herself, he didn’t want to believe it was true. “But what about the FBI? They have to continue searching for him!” 

“I don’t know, but I don’t think so,” Diane said, and Will shook his head, trying to suppress the anger he was feeling right now. It was pointless at the moment and wouldn’t help anybody. So instead, he just scooted closer and laid his arm around Diane, who laid her head on his shoulder. 

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore,” Diane whispered, and Will nodded slowly. 

“Okay, then we will just sit here, drink tea and watch stupid TV-shows for background noise,” he suggested. 

“Sounds wonderful,” Diane mumbled, and Will reached for the remote to turn on the TV. When the last program Diane had watched turned out to be the Discovery Channel, he raised his eyebrows at her.

“Really?” 

“What? Sometimes there are good documentaries on. You know some people like to educate themselves and not only watch sports.” 

“Did you just call me uneducated?” 

“Yes, I did,” she answered with a small smile, and Will poked her in her side, causing her, despite everything, to flinch and giggle a bit as she was ticklish. It was amazing how Will could turn a horrible day into a better one. She was able to calm down in his arms, despite what happened and what Giddeon had told her, she felt safe in his arms. Diane knew Will would do everything in his power to protect her, and she needed him by her side. 

Diane wished she was brave enough to tell him how she felt, that lately there was more than friendship, but she was too scared of his reaction. Because when he wasn’t by her side, there would be an emptiness in her life Diane couldn’t compensate, then a part of her would be missing, a part she came to love so much. 

Suddenly Will laid down on his back and pulled Diane with him, so she laid half on top of him; a little surprised by this, she looked at him. “This is more comfortable, and as I had to sit through a whole meeting with Howard, I can’t guarantee to stay awake during a documentary about Papua New Guinea,” he explained nonchalantly. After a moment, Diane willed her thoughts to stop racing in her head and just laid down, snuggling into his side and embracing the comforting warmth of his body. 

After a while, Will’s hand began to gently stroke her back as he watched the documentary, not realizing that his actions caused her heart to beat faster again, this time not out of fear. It had been a long time since Diane had been together with a man like this. For a moment, she wished this would be normal. Diane wished there was no Giddeon, no lingering shadow in her life, that this was just an ordinary Friday evening, Will and her and nobody else. 

But this would probably never be the case, so she just enjoyed the moment while it lasted.

* * *

When Will woke up with a snore, he was confused for a moment where he was. He blinked a couple of times and then noticed he was holding someone in his arms. Looking down, he saw it was Diane, who was still sound asleep.

A smile laid on Will’s lips, and his heart fluttered in his chest when he looked at her peaceful, sleeping face. She was beautiful, simple as that. His thoughts traveled back to the call of Diane a few hours earlier and the fear and panic he had felt when Will heard Diane’s own panic-filled voice, telling him Giddeon was there. 

Will had thought he would lose her. He had been sure Giddeon would hurt her, that he would abduct her or worse, kill her. The forty minutes it had taken him to get there had been the longest of his life. He couldn’t have handled losing Diane; she was the most important person in his life, even if she didn’t know it.

Will stroked a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear, and his fingers lingered on her cheek for a few more moments. He had to tell Diane how he felt, even if she thought he was crazy and had no feelings for him. Will was tired of living a lie. He loved her, he could be there for her, he could protect her, he would give his life for Diane, he could help her get over what Giddeon had done to her. 

But Will was pulled out of his thoughts when someone rang the doorbell. Frowning, Will glanced at his watch and saw it was shortly after eight pm. Who could that be? With a sigh, he gently shook Diane. 

“Diane, Diane, wake up.” it only took a few seconds before Diane woke up and looked around, seeing Will she sat up and rubbed her hands over her face for a moment.

“What’s going on? What time is it?” she asked sleepily as Will sat up as well. 

“It’s shortly after eight, and there’s someone at the door,” he answered and saw how she tensed. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll get it,” he said and stood up before Diane could even protest. Upon opening the door, Will saw a man and woman standing in front of him. Both were tall and wore dark suits. They practically screamed FBI. 

“Hello, what can I do for you?” Will asked, and his hunch turned out to be true when the two showed him FBI badges. 

“Good evening Sir, I’m Agent Blake, and this is my colleague Agent Miller. We’re sorry to bother you this late, but we would like to talk to Diane Lockhart. Is she home?” 

“I’m Will Gardner, Diane’s business partner and best friend. You can come in,” Will said and stepped aside to let them in. 

“Will?” Diane appeared in the doorway to her living room and looked warily at the two strangers. 

“It’s okay, Diane, these are FBI Agents.” she relaxed a little and walked closer. 

“We’re sorry to bother you this late, but we only got word of the second incident an hour ago. We took over your case from the local police, and we’d like to work together to find Andrew Giddeon. Therefore we’d like to ask you some questions.” the female Agent said, and Diane nodded slowly. 

“Alright, come in,” Diane said and gestured for them to follow her to the living room. Will saw she had removed their tea and turned off the TV which had been running before. 

The four of them sat down, with Diane and Will sitting on the couch. The two Agents shared a glance and then looked at Diane. 

“We’d like to talk alone-”

“No,” Diane interrupted them, “he stays, I’ll tell you everything you want to know, but only if Will stays,” Diane clarified and left no room for arguments. 

“Alright, we read the report of the first attack by Giddeon. Is there anything else you might remember?” Agent Miller asked, but Diane shook her head. 

“No, I already told the police everything and can’t remember anything else. I tried, even though it was hard, but there is nothing,” Diane said, and Miller nodded, thinking about what Detective Sheridan had told her Diane continued. “You’re really investigating against him? You’ll try to find him?” both Agents frowned. 

“Yes, why would you think otherwise?” Blake asked. 

“One of the Detectives called and told me you took over the case and that officially they would try to find him, but unofficially they wouldn’t investigate,” Diane said, studying the two Agents closely. 

“That’s true; they won’t investigate officially, we will. Ms. Lockhart, we don’t know if the Detective already told you, but Andrew Giddeon is a dangerous man. He is no ordinary criminal, you know he was a Seal, but he was also an Agent within the CIA until recently. That was until we discovered he was responsible for multiple war crimes. We have more resources and higher chances to catch him than the Chicago PD.” Diane had grabbed Will’s hand when they had told them about the war crimes, and Will felt a cold shudder run down his back.

“What did he do?” Diane asked, and the Agents didn’t have to ask what she meant. 

“Ms. Lockhart, I don’t-” 

“You read my file, didn’t you? You know what he did to me. I think I can handle it.” Diane stated. 

“He brutally raped and killed multiple women in countries he was stationed in. It seemed he got word of an investigation regarding the murdered women and left the CIA to go into hiding. As far as we know, you are the only woman who survived one of his attacks.” Agent Miller said, and Diane closed her eyes, and Will felt how she began to shake, so he laid his arm back around her, and subconsciously she leaned into his body, which gave her the support she needed.

“We know it’s not easy to talk about it, but we have to know everything to catch him because we want to catch him, Ms. Lockhart, we won’t stop until we have locked him up. But we need your help. Can you tell us what happened today?” 

So Diane told them everything that happened today. She repeated everything Giddeon had said word for word, and Will, also hearing it for the first time, felt sick. They knew Giddeon was a dangerous asshole, but not until this moment how dangerous and sick he really was. 

“And then he left?” Blake asked, having taken notes of everything Diane said. Diane nodded. 

“Yes, I thought he would take me...but he left. Maybe he knew he couldn’t get me out of there without being seen or drawing too much attention to himself. The bar was full of people.” 

“Okay, thank you, Ms. Lockhart, that’s everything, for now, if you happen to remember anything else, don’t hesitate to call. We will also keep you updated on everything we find,” Miller began as the two Agents stood, as did Diane and Will, “I also think it might be better if you weren’t alone tonight.” 

“She won’t be. I will stay.” Will said. No force on this earth would make him leave Diane alone tonight. 

“Alright, but we will also station two Agents in front of your house for your personal safety until Giddeon is no threat to you anymore.” before today, Diane would have protested. After this day she was actually alright with the idea that there were people near her who might be able to stop Giddeon should he come after her again. 

“Okay, thank you,” Diane answered, and the four of them walked towards her front door. 

“Have a good night, Ms. Lockhart, Mr. Gardner,” Blake said, and when Miller reached for the door, handle Diane’s phone rang on the small counter in the hallway. Flinching, Diane looked at the caller ID. It was Detective Sheridan. 

“Wait, that’s the Detective who worked on my case,” she said, and the Agents stopped in an instant. 

“Detective Sheridan?” Diane answered the call and heard the excited and nervous sounding voice of the woman. 

“Diane? I’m sorry about what happened today and that I couldn’t be there, but I found something! I can’t tell you on the phone, meet me at the Grand Hotel on 193 Street, room 429, if I’m right then, Giddeon had help from a partner.” without giving Diane a chance to say anything else, the Detective had hung up and left Diane a little speechless as she laid the phone on the counter. 

“What did she say?” 

“She said she found out something about Giddeon, that he had helped from a partner and that I should meet her at the Grand Hotel on 193 Street in room 429,” she told them, and the Agents looked at each other silently agreeing on something. 

“Alright, we will take you there. We have to work together on this, or we won’t be able to catch him.” Miller said. 

Will and Diane hurried to put on some shoes and coats to leave for the Hotel as fast as possible. 

“Are you okay?” Will asked as they sat in the back of the car of the two Agents.

“Yeah...I think so. I just- there so much happening. I have to think about what she said, what if she is right? What if he has a partner? Who is he? Do I know him?” 

“I won’t say it is no possibility, but we investigate against him for a while now. There was never an indicator that he had a partner. That was the only thing he always had problems with, teamwork, he could force himself to do it and work well together, but it wasn’t something that came naturally for him. He worked best when he was alone.” Miller said as he pushed the speed limits as far as he could. 

“It was worse enough thinking only Giddeon was after me, and now there is the possibility of two? I- just want this to be finally over.” Diane confessed, and Will took her hand his, and Diane gave it a squeeze. 

When they finally arrived at the Hotel, it didn’t take them long to get to the room Detective Sheridan had told them to meet her in. 

“Detective Sheridan, it’s me, Diane,” Diane called out after she knocked on the door. They waited a few seconds, but there was no reaction, she knocked again, but nobody answered. 

“Step aside,” said Agent Miller quietly, and Diane made room and shared a worried look with Will as the Agent prepared to kick the door down. Without further ado, he did as Diane suspected and kicked the door to the room down. Both Agents hurried inside but stopped after taking only a couple of steps inside the room.

“Fuck.” one of them said, but Diane couldn’t remember whom. She had went inside after them even though Will had tried to hold her back, but it was too late. 

Diane screamed in horror at the sight before her, Will pulled her into his arms and turned away, but they couldn’t unsee it.

The whole bed was red with blood, next to the bed laid Detective Sheridan. She faced the door, her eyes empty but widened in horror, while the force of the bullet, which had entered her head between her eyes, had only left a bloody mess of the back of her head. 

* * *

Hello, my wonderful readers!  
The muse was kicking, and I hope you like the new chapter! Things are going to get wild here, but I hope you will stick around!  
And just for the record, your comments on the last chapter nearly made me cry in happiness! I loved each and every one of them, and you don’t know how much they mean to me, especially since the last few weeks have been so difficult. I’m so thankful you guys are the best!

Please tell me what you think of the new chapter! I love you all!


	8. Chapter 8

"Diane? Come on...there is nothing we can do anymore." Will's calm voice said, his arm laid protectively around her shoulder, and he held her hand with the other. Diane and Will still sat on the floor leaning against the opposite wall, facing the hotel room, which was currently swarmed by CSI, ME, Police, and FBI. 

But Diane didn't react to his words. She was still staring at the dead body of Carol Sheridan under the white cloth. After overcoming the first shock, she had slid down the wall and hadn't moved since. Because they had been with the FBI, there was no real need for a statement, and Diane also hadn't said one word. 

Will, having a hard time himself to do or say anything, had simply sat down next to her and wait until Diane was ready. He didn't even know what he was waiting for, crying? Was he waiting for a breakdown? The realization in which danger she was, because Giddeon had been able to kill a Detective seemingly with ease? Will didn't know. What he knew was that he didn't like the silence. 

Seeing no reaction yet again, Will got up with a sigh, "I'll be right back, okay?" he said but was still met with silence. He walked up to the FBI Agents Blake and Miller. 

"Did you find anything?" Will asked, and the Agents looked at him. 

"Yes and no. It looks like she was executed, the CSI found her destroyed phone under the bed, but they can't say right now if they're going to be able to gather some information from it." having expected as much, Will nodded slowly. 

"How is she doing?" Blake asked and threw a slightly worried look over Will's shoulder towards Diane. 

"As expected," Will threw a quick look over his shoulder as well, seeing that Diane still hadn't moved one millimeter. "Normally, I know exactly what is going on in her head. I've known her for years she's my best friend. But right now, I'm clueless." Will admitted. 

"That's why I wanted to ask if it's alright if we head home. Though I doubt we can help you more than we already did, we could talk tomorrow." Will told them, and Miller nodded. 

"Sure, we'll call you tomorrow to talk with you, and an Officer will drive you home." 

"Thanks," he answered and walked back towards Diane. "Diane, come on, let's go home. We can't help here anymore." Will expected to be met with no reaction, but Diane took a deep breath and spoke for the first time. 

"Alright," she said in a hoarse voice and held out her hands. Will shook off his surprise and immediately took them and helped her stand up, they walked out of the hotel, and a young officer waved them over to his car. As they got inside the car, which was quite a weird feeling, Will thought about what to say. But when he looked at Diane, he swallowed down any empty words of comfort. He felt that right now wasn't the time, so he just took Diane's hand in his and felt how she squeezed it tightly, some progress at least. 

When they arrived at her house, they went inside, and Will locked the door behind him. As he turned around, he just saw Diane walk inside the living room and followed her. Diane carelessly threw her coat on her sofa before continuing her way to the kitchen, and as Will stepped inside the kitchen, she had already grabbed a bottle of Scotch and two glasses. 

Filling them both with a generous amount of the amber liquid, Diane downed one of them without as much as a flinch. Will stepped next to her as Diane filled her glass once again but didn't drink from it; just when Will wanted to say something, Diane beat him to it. 

"She died because she found something," Diane said in a quiet but resolute voice, staring at the opposite wall and lifting the glass up to her lips but pausing. With a frustrated scream, Diane threw the glass at the wall and slammed her hand down the kitchen isle as she watched the Scotch run down the wall. 

"That fucking bastard, she was right! She knew something. He murdered her because she helped me!" Diane said, and when she looked at Will, he saw the determination behind the tears in her eyes. 

"I'm fucking done with this, I'm done waiting around scared like a little girl! I'm done with it! He hurt that young woman, and he murdered Detective Sheridan because they helped me, because they stood between him and me! I won't let him hurt anyone else, I will find that sick son of a bitch, and I will lock him up for the rest of his life!" She said, and Will pulled her in his arms. 

"You're right, but _we_ are going to lock him up! Don't you think you are on your own, I promised you I would be there every step of the way, and I will keep that promise!" Will told her and felt how she wrapped her own arms around him and nodded against his neck.

"I know you will," she whispered, and for a while, they just stood in her kitchen. Just when Will wanted to speak again, when everything regarding his feelings for her dared to burst for him, Diane pulled away and looked at the stain on her wall as well as the pieces of broken glass on her kitchen floor. 

"I better clean that up," she said, and for a second, Will had to suppress the urge to curse but quickly went to help Diane clean up the mess. It didn't take very long, and as Diane threw away the remains of the broken glass Will reached for the glass Diane had filled with Scotch for him and downed the liquid as well. He felt the pleasant burn in the back of his throat and how the warmth traveled through his body, outgoing from his stomach. 

Diane had filled a new glass with water to do something as a strange silence lingered between them. She couldn't really tell what was wrong, there was something unspoken that hadn't been there before, and she tried to think of something to say, but nothing right came to her mind. 

"I'll go to bed. I'm tired…" Diane finally decided to say, and Will nodded. 

"Yeah, me too," he added with a nod, and as Diane walked past him and was almost out the door, she turned around, and before she had really thought about the words, they already left her mouth. 

"I don't want to be alone tonight, could you- could you sleep upstairs with me?" before she could take them back, Will nodded. 

"Of course, I'm also pretty tired." they stared at each other for a few more seconds, but then Diane walked out of the kitchen, partly to hide the small blush she could feel on her cheeks. Will followed her and only realized when he stood in front of her bedroom door that he had never actually been there. He carefully stepped inside and looked around. It brought a small smile to his lips because the room was exactly like he had imagined it. 

The room was elegant and modest, the queen-sized bed had a tasteful light gray and white bedding with a jacquard pattern. Across the room was an old side broad with a vase of lilies on them, some candles, and a modern painting on the wall. All in all, it was just Diane and he instantly liked it. 

"I think I might have a spare toothbrush for you somewhere," Diane said as she walked into the bathroom that was connected to her bedroom. He followed her and looked around the equally Diane like bathroom, she knelt down and searched in the cabinet under the sink. 

"Don't worry, it's no big deal if you don't find one," he said, but when Diane raised an eyebrow at him, he raised his hands in mock defeat, "what I meant was, I would really appreciate it, cause I can't sleep without brushing my teeth." 

"I thought so," with that she stood up and threw a fresh toothbrush at him. As Will brushed his teeth, Diane removed what little makeup had been left until now, and as he watched her out of the corner of his eyes, he couldn't help but think she looked as beautiful without makeup as with makeup, in his eyes even more so. 

Once Will had finished brushing his teeth, he left the bathroom and stood in Diane's bedroom; for a moment, he was unsure what to do. He had nothing to sleep in, so he simply got out of his suit jacket and tie as well as his shirt. For a second he wondered if he should keep on his pants, but then he decided it was stupid and got out of them and his socks and shoes, leaving him in his boxer briefs. Looking into the floor-length mirror near the bed, his mind suddenly spinning. What if this was too much? He was almost naked after all, what if Diane thought he was a perverted idiot? 

His raging train of thoughts was interrupted when the bathroom door opened, and Diane stepped outside in her own pajamas. It was a matching t-shirt and shorts combo, showing off her long legs, and Will could make out her nipples against the fabric of the t-shirt as she wore no bra. Will's mouth suddenly felt very dry, it might not be something willingly sexy in the classical sense, but she looked incredible in anything. In his opinion, Diane could wear a potato bag and still look amazing. Shaking off these thoughts, he quickly turned to the bed, Will hoped he hadn't been caught staring. 

But when Diane had stepped out of the bathroom and saw Will, she couldn't have possibly noticed him staring at her because her own eyes were fixed on his appearance. Diane had never really thought about Will without clothes, not seriously at least, and even though she knew he was active and athletic, she was positively surprised by his well-defined muscles. It wasn't anything too extreme, just like Diane preferred it, he really was attractive, and she understood all the women who slept with him. 

Suddenly, Diane realized that she found a man physically attractive for the first time in months and actually wanted to be close to him. In another moment, she thought back to the young women he was usually intimate with, and with a pang of regret, Diane thought of her own body. 

Before the rape, she was happy with her body. She looked good, worked out, and ate healthy, no, there was nothing to be ashamed of at age 43. Still, Diane knew she wasn't twenty anymore, no matter what, some signs of age could not be stopped or erased, and before, she did not give a damn about that. Now she had to learn to accept her body again, and while she was on the right way, this realization somehow made her doubt herself. 

"Do you want a t-shirt?" Diane asked suddenly. 

"Huh?" he hadn't understood her immediately because he was still trying to sort out his thoughts, "Oh- sure, but I doubt I fit in one of yours," Will cursed himself for his stupid answer, but Diane had to smile. 

"I'd love to see you in one of mine, but no, there must be one that could fit you," Diane said as she walked over to the walk-in closet. A few seconds later, she returned with a men's t-shirt, and when she handed it to him, Will couldn't help but feel a strong wave of jealousy. Was this a leftover shirt from a former boyfriend or lover? Diane must have seen his expression and grinned. 

"It's mine, and no, it's not what you think. It's one of my father's old t-shirts, and I use it as a nightdress." Diane explained, and the green-eyed monster in his chest calmed down again. As he held the shirt out in front of him, he couldn't help but laugh. 

"Led Zeppelin? _Your_ father had a Led Zeppelin shirt?" he asked, and Diane nodded. 

"Yeah, it was one of his favorite bands." 

"You're kidding, right?" 

"No, why would I?" she asked, but Will just shook his head and put the offered t-shirt on. 

"Once again, no one would believe me if I tell people Diane' elegant designer clothes' Lockhart sleeps in old Led Zeppelin shirts," he said as they finally slipped under the covers and Diane playfully slapped his shoulder. 

"Because you won't even tell people, or I'll have Simone dig out one of your well-kept secrets," she said and Will chuckled. 

"Okay, okay." 

As they laid there in the dark, Diane again came to realize that Will had this wonderful nature that made it possible to make her feel better. Despite the horror she had once again gone through this day, when she was with Will, he managed to make her feel good again. Diane wasn't thinking so much about what had happened in the bar and the hotel as she would have if not for Will. But now, as the quiet darkness surrounded them, Diane's mind took her back to something that bothered her very much, and she had to talk about it because Will was the only one she could tell.

"I was paralyzed with fear," she whispered into the dark. As they had laid there long enough, her eyes had accustomed to the absence of light and saw how his head turned and then felt his eyes on her. 

"When?" 

"Today, in that cubicle. I swore to myself when he did it the first time that this would never happen again. That I would never let that happen again because it's the worst feeling in the world. Not being able to move, to speak. But when he came after me today...it happened again, and he didn't even have to use that drug...I just- I couldn't do anything, and I was so helpless," Diane said quietly and sighed.

"I don't know what he would have done if not for that young woman…and I couldn't move one muscle." Will shifted closer and pulled Diane into his arms.

"You survived things many can't even imagine Di, everybody who went through the same thing you did would be paralyzed with fear; it's a natural reaction. It doesn't mean you're weak or anything. You're human and so much stronger than you think you are. You came this far Diane, you're the strongest person I know, and we'll make him pay for everything." Will said, and Diane felt tears burn in her eyes.

"Thank you," she murmured back, and Will placed a kiss on her hairline. 

"There's nothing to thank me for," he said, and his hand rubbed soothing circles on her back and Diane couldn't remember when the last time was she had felt this comfortable and at home. Slowly she began to fall asleep, and for the first time in four months, her dreams were not filled with darkness.

* * *

When Diane was woken by her alarm, she felt more rested than in months, despite the early hour and her unregular sleep. The reason for that was the very same since three days, and currently sleeping next to her in her bed, Will's arm laid securely around her waist, and sometime in the night, he had pulled her against him so she could feel the warmth radiating off him. As Diane turned her head, she saw Will's peaceful, sleeping face close to her own, he still wore her father's old shirt. Will had worn it the whole weekend he had stayed at her place, even after he had gotten some clothes from his apartment on Saturday, he had continued to wear the shirt to sleep. 

Not yet ready to get up, Diane carefully turned in his arms and snuggled back into his warm embrace. She buried her face in his neck, inhaling his scent, a mix of fresh herbs, a little bit of wood and leather, just a waft of something sweet and, under the circumstances, sleep. Diane loved his smell, always had, and now it made her heart beat faster, and she wished time would stop for a while, so they didn't have to get up. She had actually never felt this way before, never this comfortable in another man's embrace, but with Will, Diane felt she was right where she belonged.

Being with Will had kept the Demons at bay, even though the image of Detective Sheridan's body hunted her mind. But Diane was still determent to find Giddeon and his mystery partner. She had called Agent Blake yesterday because, over the weekend, Will and her had spoken about Giddeon and everything regarding the case. They had talked about the other, seemingly unrelated cases with the other woman, and Diane and Will agreed that there might be more to them. This afternoon they would meet the Agents and go through the reports of the attacks.

Glancing at the clock on her nightstand, she saw that they really had to get up. With a feeling of regret she hadn't felt often in her life, she carefully parted from Will and wriggled out of his embrace. Sitting up, Diane already wondered how Will could've slept through her alarm, so she gently shook him. 

"Will, wake up. We have to go to work," she said, and after a few seconds, Will woke up with a snore.

"What- I'm up, I'm up," Will grumbled sleepily before yawning, and Diane couldn't help but smile. 

"You almost had eight hours of sleep. Didn't you once tell me you only need four and can still jump out of bed and go to work?" Diane asked, bemused as Will sat up with another yawn. What Diane didn't know was that Will had also stayed awake for the better part of this and the previous nights and prevented the few nightmares Diane had when she slept from waking her, so she could get some much-needed sleep at the cost of his own rest. But he'd rather bite his tongue off than tell her.

"That was almost five years ago. How the hell can you even remember?"

"Because I knew one day I could use it against you," Diane said as she got up and went to take a shower. Once she was dressed and walked down the stairs, she found Will standing in the kitchen, and he just turned around with two coffee mugs in hand and placed them on the kitchen isle where two plates of steaming scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon waited. 

"You made breakfast?" Diane asked and tried to hide the wariness in her voice regarding her knowledge of Will's kitchen skills. 

"Yes, I did, and while I might not be the best cook in the world, scrambled eggs and toast is still in my repertoire," he said and pushed one mug towards her. Diane's eyes wandered through her kitchen and widened when she saw the mess. 

"You only made breakfast. Why does the kitchen look like a bomb went off? Did you use a new bowl and pan for every single egg?" Diane asked, half amused and half annoyed, and Will scratched the back of his head sheepishly. 

"I thought I mentioned the only thing worse than my cooking is organizing my cooking and keeping the kitchen clean. But you know how it goes; one does the cooking, the other does the dishes." 

"Ha!" Diane said sarcastically and shook her head, "Not a chance that I'm going to clean up your mess," then she glanced at her watch, "You have around half an hour to clean that up, then we really have to leave." 

"It was worth a shot," Will mumbled and then pulled out his phone and typed in a message. 

"What are you doing?" Diane asked.

"Texting Simone, I'm asking her if she could clean up your kitchen." Diane couldn't help but laugh at him and shook her head, then she carefully tried the scrambled eggs. It turned out it was actually pretty good.

"And?" Will asked, and Diane nodded slowly.

"Not bad...actually pretty good," he threw his hands in the air in celebration, and they both laughed. "Thank you for staying the weekend, Will. It really helped me," she said once the laughter had died down. 

"You will never stop thanking me, won't you? Diane, I'm doing this because I want to. This is nothing I have to force myself to do. I like spending time with you, and if I'm able to protect you and be there for you, that's all the better," Will said and took her hand. "There is no reason to thank me." 

"I'll try to say it not so much anymore…but I am really thankful for what you do. I guess I don't want you to regret one day that you...wasted your time on me." 

"That's impossible," he said, and their eyes met, but before either of them could say something, Will's phone buzzed, and his eyes looked at the screen. He rolled his eyes and showed Diane the message he had received from Simone. 

_"I'll_ _do it because I feel sorry for Diane, and her kitchen had to suffer so much under your 'skills'!"_

Diane grinned and shook her head, amused.

* * *

Both Diane and Will had finished most of their work by the time the two Agents walked towards her office, lead by Kalinda. When the three stepped inside her office, Diane looked up and waved Will over, who signaled her he would be there once he had finished the phone call. 

"Hello Diane, I hope you had an okay weekend, under the circumstances." Agent Blake greeted her as they shook hands. 

"Yes, it was okay," Diane answered and gave the two a small smile. Then she looked towards Kalinda, "I hope you don't mind Kalinda helping us. She's our investigator, the best there is, and a very good friend. I trust her with my life," Diane explained, and the two Agents nodded.

"No, that's alright, if you trust her. And if we want to find something in the reports that the police missed, and go through our international files, then we need every pair of eyes." Miller said with a serious expression and nodded to the two big boxes filled with files he had placed on the table in Diane's office.

"Under the files, here are also older cases that match the MO. We think whenever he was in the area between jobs, he raped a woman. Two of them were also murdered after their rape." Miller explained, and Diane involuntarily shuddered at the thought that even more women out there shared the same fate as her.

"Well, I'd say let's get started. We have a lot to go through." Blake said, and with that, the four of them sat down at the desk and began to read through the files of the women that the FBI Agents thought were related to Giddeon. A few minutes after they started, Will finally walked inside, looking a little annoyed that his call had taken so long. 

"I'm sorry for being late, but that was an important call," he explained as he walked to the free chair next to Diane. Kalinda noticed with a smile that when he walked past the blonde, his hand laid on her shoulder and slide down halfway down her arm as he sat down. 

"No problem, we only started a few minutes ago. Just grab a file and start reading," Blake said, and Will nodded. The five of them read through the files and took notes on a whiteboard. They had pulled the curtains over the windows so nobody could watch what they were doing. 

"There is something wrong here," Diane said after almost three hours; her eyes burned, but they were focused on the notes on the reports and the notes of Kalinda and Will she has read moments before. 

"What do you mean?" asked Agent Miller. 

"Part of the statements are different. Some women didn't describe Giddeon. A few of them said he was tall and lean build and talked to them. Others said he was quiet and shorter and bulkier. I think that both his partner and Giddeon...took turns raping these women," Diane said and began to sort the reports. 

"These," she gestured to the seven cases on the left side of the whiteboard, "were rape by Giddeon, they described him precisely, they stated he talked to them during it, and most of them state he made them have an involuntary orgasm. The other five were raped by his partner, he has another build, he didn't talk to them and was more careful to leave no DNA. While they knew Giddeon wouldn't show up if traces were to be tested, his partner probably would, so they both made sure to leave no DNA behind, but it was to protect his partner and to let the police think this was only one perp." Diane explained her thoughts, and the others agreed with her theory after a moment.

"That makes a lot of sense," Blake said. 

"And I would like to talk to them. We need their help, and they deserve to know that we're doing everything to find him," Diane said.

"Are you sure about that?" Will asked, and Diane nodded. 

"If the tables were turned, I would want to know. I want to start with the older cases," she said. 

"I'll go with you," Kalinda answered, "We should start with Andrea Sanders. The first two women moved away."

"I would like to join you as well," Agent Blake said, and Diane and Kalinda nodded. Will would have liked to join them as well, but he had another client meeting. While he would drop everything to help her, it was an unspoken agreement between them that Will would take care of their firm when Diane needed the time. 

"Okay, I'll visit the CSU. Maybe they found something that could help us." Miller said, and got up. The rest of them cleaned up the room. 

"Be careful, okay?" Will whispered as he hugged her goodbye, and Diane gave him a small smile. 

"I'm always careful, and I have Kalinda and Agent Blake by my side. I have nothing to worry about." Will smiled. 

"Of course." 

"I'll see you later, and don't mess up the meeting with Mr. Abler," Diane told him with a grin, and Will laughed. 

"Me? Never," he answered, and with that the three women left the office and their firm. 

They took Diane's car and drove into one of the poor neighborhoods with high gang activity. When Diane called the young woman's picture to her mind, she couldn't believe that she ended up here. Andrea had a bright future ahead of her, but then Andrew Giddeon came into her life, deciding she would be his next victim. After that, her life was one sad story, as she also lost her last two living relatives, her parents, to a drunk driver.

"Diane?" Kalinda's voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and she looked up only to see they had stopped. "We're there." her friend added, and Diane nodded. 

"Sorry, I've been thinking." 

"No problem, "as they got out of the car, Diane didn't see the slightly worried look Agent Blake gave her. The building in front of which they stood looked like it was ready to be demolished, but a young man just walked out of the house. 

"Seems like we don't have to waste our time ringing the doorbell," Kalinda mumbled when they saw there were no intact doorbells. They walked inside and up the dangerous-looking staircase to the second floor. Kalinda almost didn't dare to knock on the door in fear of knocking the whole door down. 

A few moments later, the door was opened by a small boy who was just tall enough to reach the doorknob. He had quite long blonde hair and big brown eyes, some freckles covered his nose and cheeks, he wore a striped shirt and jeans that had so many patches and holes that Diane wasn't sure if it was a jeans or just patches with a few pieces of denim in between. He couldn't be older than four, and Diane wasn't sure if she liked the fact that he simply opened the door without knowing who was there.

"Hello there, my name is Kalinda. What's your name?" Kalinda asked with a smile. 

"Teddy," he answered with a curious glance at them. 

"Hi Teddy, is your Mom home?" she asked, and Teddy nodded. 

"Are you friends?" he asked and tilted his head to his side with a curious expression that made him look older. 

"Yeah, new friends, my name is Diane, and this is-" Diane glanced at the Agent; she only realized now she had no idea what her first name was. 

"Alex." 

"Would you get your mom for us?" Diane asked, and with a nod, Teddy vanished inside the apartment, only to return a few minutes later. The woman that followed him had nothing in common with the woman Diane had seen on the picture barely an hour earlier. 

Andrea Sanders was only the shadow of herself. She was pale and dangerously thin, there were dark shadows under her eyes, and her dull brown hair was pulled back into a messy bun. Her shirt hung loosely around her thin frame, and her pants were equally baggy. 

"Who are you?" she asked and pulled her son behind with a little bit more force than needed. 

"My name is Diane Lockhart, this is Kalinda Sharma and Alex Blake. We would like to talk to you because we need your help if that's alright with you?" Diane said, and Andrea looked at them each before nodding. 

"Come in," she said shortly and turned around. The apartment wasn't big, and while it wasn't that dirty, the apartment's general condition was so bad, they felt uncomfortable sitting down anywhere. 

"What do you want?" Andrea asked as she sat down in the ratty armchair. 

"Well…we would like to talk to you about what happened to you four years ago," Diane began and saw how Andrea tensed, her eyes fixed on Diane. 

"Why?" 

"Because we know who did it, the same man attacked me a few months ago. But to make sure, we would like to ask you some questions." Diane pulled down the collar of her blouse and showed her the scars of her bite wound. Andrea's eyes widened briefly, and her right twitched towards her thigh, but then she clenched them into fists before she looked towards the dusty window. 

"I don't want to remember," Andrea whispered. 

"Neither do I, but we want to catch him, and when we do, I want him to be charged for every crime he committed. Because we deserve closure, and we deserve that he is locked up for everything he did to us." 

"There are more?" 

"Yes, at least seven we know of. Therefore we need your statement once again. We know more about him now than four years ago, there is a real chance we can get him." Diane said. 

Before Andrea could answer Diane, felt a tug on her sleeve, and she looked down to see Teddy there. 

"Do you wanna see my room?" he asked with a hopeful look on his face, but just when Diane wanted to answer, Andrea harshly spoke up. 

"No, stay in your room." Diane's heart broke when she saw the hope vanish from his face, he kinda reminded her of Will. She shared a look with Kalinda, who nodded, silently telling her it was okay to go.

"No, it's okay, I'd really like to see your room," he smiled and took her hand to pull her towards a small room. This one looked as sad and dismal as the rest of the apartment, maybe even more so because this was supposed to be a child's room, and all Diane could see was a small bed and a handful of toys. Behind a room divider, she could see a regular bed and a wardrobe. 

"This is my bed...and that's Fuzzy," he ran to his bed and pulled an old teddy bear from his pillow to show it to her. 

"Nice to meet you, Fuzzy, and that's a pretty room, Teddy," Diane said, shaking the paw of the bear, and Teddy beamed at her. 

"Thanks, I made my bed today!" 

"Really? You did great, how old are you, Teddy?" Diane said as she knelt down to be on eye level with him.

"Almost four!" he said and held up four little fingers. And in an instant, Diane understood that this unbelievable sweet boy smiling at her was Andrew Giddeon's son. While his plan hadn't succeeded with her, it had apparently worked with at least one of his other victims, and Diane felt a cold shudder run down her back at the thought that they would meet more of his children today. 

But when she looked at the boy who now searched for his crayons to color a picture for her, she felt no hatred or disgust. She was merely sad that this little boy had the worst father possible and had been robbed of a real father.

"The sun's red 'cause I lost my yellow," Teddy explained to her as he drew the sun. 

"Oh, didn't your mom get you a new one?" she asked, but Teddy shook his head. 

"I didn't tell." 

"Why?" 

"I don't wanna make Mommy angry," he mumbled, and it only broke her heart even more. This was wrong. No child should be afraid to tell they lost a crayon because they were scared to make their parent angry. Diane had no right to judge, and she really didn't want to, but she had the feeling that Andrea hadn't processed what had happened to her very well and couldn't live with the fact that her rapist was her son's father. 

Diane continued to talk with Teddy until he finished his picture. It turned out to be her he had drawn, with a big red sun in the upper corner of the paper, and though the figure was hardly recognizable as a human, Diane simply loved it. 

Just when Diane got up, Kalinda, Agent Blake, and Andrea appeared in the doorway. 

"You have to go now," Andrea said coldly, and Diane nodded, also seeing Kalinda's nod towards the door behind the back of the woman. 

"Of course, thank you for everything," Diane said, but before she could really get up, Teddy flung himself at her, hugging her tightly with his little arms around her neck. Even though Diane was surprised, she instantly wrapped her arms around him. This was also not quite normal; children didn't hug people they just met like that. 

"You visit again?" he whispered, and Diane let out a small sigh.

"I'll try to, okay?" she whispered back and then gently pulled back from the hug. 

"Mommy, can Diane stay?" 

"No, now stop that!" Andrea told him harshly. 

"And visit?" Teddy asked once more as he and Diane stood up. 

"I said no," his eyes filled with tears, but they did not fall from his eyes. Diane leaned down again, gave him a smile, and laid her hand on his small shoulder.

"Thank you for that wonderful picture Teddy, it'll get a special place in my office," with that she stood and turned around looking at Andrea, whom she understood so well and at the same time not at all. 

"If you ever need anything, please, don't hesitate to call," Diane told Andrea and handed her one of her business cards. 

"Yeah," Andrea only mumbled, but deep down, Diane knew she would never call. 

"Goodbye, Teddy," she said, and Teddy waved back, still trying to keep the tears at bay. With a last wave and an aching heart Diane, Kalinda, and Agent Blake left. 

As the three women walked back to her car, Diane took a deep breath. 

"Did she tell you Teddy is Giddeon's son?" Diane asked, but Kalinda shook her head. 

"Not really, but when you do the math, it's really no surprise, and with what we know about that bastard," Kalinda said. "What really worries me is how she deals with it." 

"Yeah, but while I think it's not okay...can you really blame her? I- I don't know if I could do this." 

"But if you decide to get that Baby, either you love it or if you find yourself unable to, then give it up for adoption. You don't treat you kid like that." Kalinda answered. Before Diane could argue that it wasn't that easy, the phone of the Agent rang, and with every word, her face showed more and more concern. 

"Alright, we'll be there," once she ended the call, she looked at the other two with a dead-serious expression.

"What happened?" Diane asked. 

"Miller found something, well, it wasn't actually Miller, a woman called the police because she found something in your house, Diane." 

* * *

Hello, my lovely readers!

I'm sorry you had to wait so long for a new chapter, but I quit my horrible job, but I already have a new one so don't worry, I'm happy!

I really hope you liked the new extra-long chapter. Please tell me what you thought about it in a comment. What will they find at Diane's?

And as I have a bit more free time now, you don't have to wait a whole month for a new chapter! 

I hope you are all healthy and feeling good and that it stays this way!

Thank you for all the wonderful comments on the last chapter. I couldn't be happier that you like the story! Love you all!


	9. Chapter 9

As they drove to her house, a million things were rushing through Diane’s mind, what could have Simone possibly found at her home? What did this son of a bitch do this time? Did he leave a message à la psychopath? Did he plaster her house in photos he took from her? Did he dump a bucket of pig’s blood on her front steps? That she really thought he was capable of everything her mind came up with actually managed to scare her a bit. 

“Diane, please stop torturing yourself,” Kalinda said as she stopped at the red traffic light behind the SVU in front of them.

“I’m not,” but Kalinda sent Diane her best ‘that’s bullshit, and you know it’ look. “Well, what am I supposed to do? Do you want me to be all happy that Giddeon was at my home? Or don’t care about it at all?” 

“No, of course not, I just- as long as we don’t know what he did, then we don’t have to expect the worst. Once we know what’s going on, then we are going to make a plan, okay?”. 

“I really want to tell you that was a shitty advice, and you’re wrong. But you’re right, and I hate it,” Diane confessed, and both women couldn’t help the small smiles that appeared on their faces. 

“I know, but we will show him that we’ll fight and that we are going to bust his ass, and for that, we need to keep a straight head. Because if we don’t, then he’s going to get away, and we won’t let that happen,” Kalinda said, and Diane nodded. 

“We sure as hell won’t,” Diane replied as the lights jumped to green, and Kalinda drove on.

“You know, I don’t usually work together like this with victims or investigators, for that matter, but even if I did, you two are surely one of the most incredible women out there. Not many could do what you two do, especially you, Diane. I rarely get to see this much of a will to fight the attacker, and I mean through all the kinds of cases I have to deal with.” Agent Blake said after listening to their conversation.

“Who would have thought that I once would get compliments about the way I try to fight my rapist? But thanks, Agent.” Diane said.

When they arrived in Diane’s street, they could already see the three police cars, another one arriving with them, and one car from the Crime Scene Unit. Although Simone had called the police, Diane grew wary of the sight before her, and she couldn’t help but wonder if her friend was really alright. 

The three women hurried out of the car and made their way over to a small group of people, under them Agent Miller and, to Diane’s relief, Simone. 

“Simone! Simone, are you okay? What happened?” Diane called when they were near them, and the woman in question turned around. 

“Oh man, you don’t know how glad I am that  _ you _ are okay. Nothing really happened; I’m okay,” Simone said as they shared a quick hug. 

“Well, something must have happened for you to call the police.” Kalinda cut in, nodding towards the police and CSU teams. 

“Yes, but, well, I’ll start at the beginning,” said Simone before taking a deep breath, “I came over to clean your kitchen after Will tried to ruin it with his cooking. And since I had the time and wanted to do something nice for you, I thought, why not clean the whole place? Not that there was much to do in the first place. So when I wanted to clean the top of your kitchen drawers, I- I found this small camera.” 

“What?” interrupted Diane and looked at Simone, confused, “A camera?” 

“Yes, at first, I thought maybe that was for security, or you wanted to keep an eye on your cleaning lady or whatever, so I put it back. But then I found another in your living room on your bookshelf and...the bathroom. I knew something was off then and...with everything that happened I called the police and once I told them I was at your house they send someone over, and Agent Miller talked to me.” before anyone could say anything, a man from the CSU walked over to where they stood. 

“Sorry to interrupt, but I wanted to tell you that we searched the whole house and found at least one camera in each room, we also searched for bugs, but fortunately, there weren’t any in the whole house.” 

“Are you one hundred percent sure there are no cameras left?” Kalinda asked, and the man nodded, although a little annoyed about being interrupted. 

“We searched everything, even for other camera types, the house is one hundred percent camera free. But we found more because what’s interesting is, these models are quite fancy, you don’t see them very often. The thing is, while they provide excellent pictures, they need a receiver that is within a 200 feet radius.” the man said, and Agent Miller immediately went into action. 

“Alright, people, we have around twenty houses to cover. Search in basements, rooftops, and empty apartments. If you find something, radio the others immediately. We don’t know what we’ll find, Giddeon is a dangerous man, and he could be around, so be careful. Go.” with that, the policemen left, and Miller looked at his fellow Agent. 

“Do you want me to stay here with you?” he asked, but Blake shook her head. 

“No, you can go. I’ll stay with Diane,” she said, and with a short nod, he was already gone. The hectic around them and the bizarreness of the situation itself made Diane only realize now the meaning of what had happened. Every minute she had spent in her own home for who knows how long had been watched by Giddeon. 

Giddeon had watched her every step, had turned her private life, everything that had apparently happened in the security of her own home into his own personal live show. There had been a camera in her bathroom. He had watched her taking a shower, getting undressed. Had he watched her when she had to have a shower after one of her nightmares? Had he watched her as she desperately tried to scrub her skin clean of him in the middle of the night? Had he watched as she started to connect with her body again? When she stood naked in front of her mirror? When she had masturbated and cried afterward in relief because it had felt good because there was hope for some kind of intimacy after what he had done? The Impact of what that all meant hit Diane with the force of a train. 

“Oh my god…” she whispered, and suddenly there was such a strong wave of nausea that Diane had barely time to turn around and get to the tree on the sidewalk for a little support when she puked her guts out. There was a hand rubbing her back immediately, and she heard comforting words from Simone while Kalinda went to get her some water. 

“Better?” Simone asked after Diane finally got rid of everything in her stomach and spat out to get rid of the lingering taste in her mouth until Kalinda handed her some water. She nodded as she washed her mouth out and took a few deep breaths. 

“That fucking son of a bitch...how the hell did he get the cameras inside my house?” Diane asked as she walked over to the stairs and sat down. 

“Well, you spend most of your time at the office.” Simone offered, but Diane shook her head. 

“I had a security system installed after it happened. If someone gets too close, there is a security guard watching. I don’t know how he could have possibly gotten inside without setting the alarm off.” They were quiet for a few minutes. The only thing that could be heard was the radio’s messages about their search for the receiver.

“What if he did it before the system was there?” Kalinda said with a frown on her face before she continued with her theory, “On the day it happened, you said he left the office for some time. What if it wasn’t only to take a mold of your key? What if he also installed the cameras when he had the chance? When he got back to you, did you see or hear anything that might indicate he set a camera up in your office?” the last part was directed at Diane, who shook her head. 

“No...I laid face down on my desk. I couldn’t see a thing. And when he came back...I did my best to not focus on him and what he did,” Diane answered, “But it’s possible.” She sighed and ran her hand through her hair. 

“This nightmare is never going to end, not while this sick son of a bitch is still out there trying to find new ways to torture me.”

“We’ll get him, Diane. He might be good, but we’re better; he won’t get away with this even if I have to follow him around the globe.” Agent Blake said, but before Diane could answer, a new radio message came through. 

“Team 3 here, We found the receiver, or what remains of it, on the rooftop of house number four. No sight of the suspect; he must have been here a few hours ago though. Send the CSU up.” the man said, and Diane didn’t know if she should feel happy about that or not. Was there even a chance for them to find him through this? Giddeon already had everything he needed, did it really matter that they found what he left for them?

“Alright, maybe...maybe we can go inside. I could really use a drink.” Diane said, and they walked into her home. Once Diane saw the state her home was in after the CSU had rampaged through it once again, she sunk down on her couch and pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling the beginning of a headache. 

“Aw fuck it, I had this whole place cleaned perfectly,” Simone said, shaking her head before she went to get some drinks. Kalinda sat down next to Diane. 

“Are you okay?” she asked. 

“Well, I think for finding out that I had no privacy in my own home for four months, I handle things pretty well.” 

“Point taken,” was the answer before Kalinda continued, “Do you want me to call Will?”

“No, I don’t want to bother him,” Diane said even though she would like nothing more than to have him by her side, but another part of her didn’t want to call him. She should be able to handle this without him and not have him come run to her whenever something happened. Even if she wanted to.

“You know he would want to know what happened and be here,” Kalinda answered, knowing exactly that Diane actually wanted Will by her side. Those two were going to be the death of her. Watching them dance around each other for years, but especially the last month, was almost painful.

“Yes, but I don’t want to call him; there is nothing we can do,” Diane said, and Simone came back with the drinks. “I just can’t believe that I never noticed them,” she added after taking a sip of the drink. 

“He is an expert on those things Diane, he wouldn’t be if you noticed them immediately. But I think he wanted you to find them someday. He didn’t really care when exactly because the knowledge alone that he could get to you with it was enough. He knows we found them, and he knows what this means for you.” Blake said, and Diane couldn’t help the sigh that escaped her. 

“He got what he wanted,” Diane said and emptied her glass in one go, as Kalinda’s phone vibrated with an incoming message. 

“Alright, it’s time to stop sulking around,” she said once she read the text on her phone. 

“What is it?”

“Well, there is something good happening today. My friend Lauren from the Computer Forensic just wrote to me she is finished with the phone of Detective Sheridan.” Kalinda said, and Diane sat up straight. This was actually good news.

“Really?” 

“Yes, she said we can come over right away,” Kalinda answered as they got up. 

“Wait a second, why did she tell you and not us? That’s also important for us, and she couldn’t know we would be together,” Agent Blake said, trying not to show she was a bit pissed about that, but then the message tone of her phone could be heard. “Alright, never mind, she just told me the same.” 

“Okay, you three go, and I’ll clean up,” Simone said, and Diane already wanted to tell her she didn’t have to, but Simone wouldn’t let her, “Darling, I’m no use to you there, and that’s the least I can do okay? You have more important things to worry about! Now go.” 

“Thank you so much, Simone!” Diane said as they shared a brief hug before she, Kalinda, and Blake, who was currently talking to her partner over the phone, left the house. 

When they arrived at the Forensic Lab half an hour later, Kalinda’s friend already waited for them. She was an African American woman around Kalinda’s age and looked like a Victora Secret model without even trying or an ounce of makeup on her face. Diane couldn’t help but wonder if ‘friend’ in this context meant something more and, with the chance of getting payback for all the times Kalinda teased her about her relationship with Will, made a note to herself to interrogate Kalinda about it later. 

“I thought that, after what this is about, you wouldn’t mind coming by this late,” Lauren said after they had introduced themselves and followed her inside her lap.

“No, I’m actually pretty grateful you called tonight. I could really use some good news today. So thank you for doing this, all of it.” Diane said, and Lauren smiled at her.

“Nothing to thank me for. It’s my job, and when I’m able to help to catch sick motherfuckers like this, all the better.” Lauren answered. 

“So first things first, I wasn’t able to save anything from the laptop, yet, this will take me much longer, and I can’t even tell if I’m able to get anything from it, but I sure as hell won’t give up. But the phone was a big hit, which is a little confusing because it should have been easier to get rid of the evidence on it. All in all, there were two reasons your man tried to destroy the phone, and it was a nice try, but he didn’t know that old awesome me would get my hands on it,” she said as they stepped over to her computer. 

“It took me a while, but I was able to retrieve the last massage the Detective sent. As you or the other Detectives didn’t mention anything, I played around with a few ideas and tried to figure out why you didn’t get the message. And then I found a trace of a virus that the CIA used to use, not many know about it, but since our guy once worked for them, it wasn’t that surprising. So this virus gave him full access to everything on the phone and, because he is a clever fucker, to other devices, like her work computer, once the Detective’s phone uses the same WiFi,” Lauren explained to them, showing them codes and everything on the computer, not that any of them understood much of it. 

“The only thing is that I don’t know how long the virus was on her phone or how he managed to put it on in the first place because while it was efficient, it was a pain in the ass to apply. That’s why the CIA stopped using it, so, therefore, we can’t tell how much he really knows. But in this case, I’d say we assume the worst. The second thing is, the virus doesn’t explain why you didn’t receive the message even though it was sent to you,” she said, looking at Diane as she turned around.

“And after I almost destroyed my lap in an outburst of rage because I was thinking too complicated, my teenage niece provided the answer when she told me one of her teachers used it. That son of a bitch used a simple interfering transmitter, so once he turned that on, the signal of the Detective was gone without her knowing. And I think that was also the reason why the message was unfinished and only on her phone.

While she typed, there was already no signal and...I guess when he entered the room, she sent it because she thought it was better than nothing, but didn’t notice it, or when she did...there was nothing she could do before he murdered her.” 

“What was the message?” Diane asked quietly, even though her heart was racing in her chest, the thought of the woman who had done everything in her power to find Andrew Giddeon and paid with her life for helping her.

“That’s also the reason I texted you directly,” Lauren said as she turned back to the screen and opened another window, “Nobody outside this room knows about this message.” 

And once Diane read the words on the screen, it was like her body was made of lead. She couldn’t breathe as her mind came to understand the meaning of the words in front of her. She grabbed Kalinda’s hand for support. 

‘ _ Diane, I found the last piece! Don’t trust the police! His partne-’  _

“Fuck, this makes everything more complicated,” Agent Blake said and rubbed two fingers over her forehead. “From now on, we will keep the communication with the police to a minimum. When we have something new, it will only come from us, don’t trust whatever the police say, and I’ll have Agents stationed around you 24/7,” she added thoughtfully and immediately pulled out her phone to organize it. 

“I changed my mind…” Diane said quietly to Kalinda, “Please call Will.”

* * *

They had spent the last two weeks on their toes, somehow waiting for anything to happen. They had been sure with everything that had happened and what they had found out that Monday two weeks ago, that Giddeon would do something. But until now, everything was normal, and nothing out of the ordinary had happened, and Will would love for it to stay this way.

While nothing had changed officially, the real team working on the case only consisted of a few FBI Agents, Detective Warren, who was more determent than ever to catch Giddeon after what had happened to his partner and best friend, as well as their own little team. 

But even though they had all tried their best, they still hadn’t found out that much more in two weeks. They avoided the police as best as they could, and though Kalinda’s contacts were more than helpful, even with them, there hadn’t been much to work with. 

The last few days were also the reason why Will had planned a small Christmas party for them, to lighten up the mood again. It wasn’t something big, just the two of them, Kalinda, Cary, Eli, Simone, Diane’s goddaughter Maia, since her parents were in Italy, two of Diane’s friends Christine and Olivia and Alicia also wanted to swing by before joining her family at her mother in law’s house.

Will actually hadn’t felt this kind of excitement around Christmas since he was a kid, and the other reason, apart from the small gathering he had organized, was his present for Diane. Henry’s brother would move to Germany due to his work, but they couldn’t take their dog with them, a three-year-old female, brown Labrador named Hazel. And since they were looking for a good home, and Will knew how much Diane would love to have a dog again, he offered to take Hazel. Another thing was that Diane wouldn’t be alone anymore, and there was someone there to protect her if Will wasn’t.

That was why he couldn’t pretend anymore that he was working and not actually waiting for Simone to finally text him everything was ready, and they could head over to Diane’s. He walked over to her office door; since there was nothing really going on, Diane insisted on getting back on track with her paperwork, and since he didn’t have to find another excuse to get her out of the house, Will had agreed. 

“This must be the first time I’m finished with my paperwork before you,” Will said as he stepped inside her office, and Diane looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“Liar,” she said and fixed him with a mock glare. Will laughed and raised his hands in defeat. 

“Nope, all done. And I actually think this is the second time, remember when you had that gross stomach flu?” 

“How could I not remember? And for the record, I still had more of my paperwork finished while almost ending up in the hospital with dehydration!” Diane said as she gathered her things and cleaned her desk. 

“That doesn’t sound healthy at all, you know?” he teased her and earned himself another glare as well as a small smile. Just when he leaned against her desk, his phone vibrated, and after a quick glance, Will had to suppress a big smile since it was a message from Simone telling him they were ready.

“Come on, let’s get home. We’ll be back here soon enough for all the paperwork,” Will said eagerly and pulled Diane up from her seat and held her coat up for her to slip in. 

“What’s gotten into you?” Diane asked, amused at seeing the evident excitement on her partner’s face. 

“Nothing, I’m hungry, and I want to spend the rest of the day on your couch, watching a movie and having a quiet and unspectacular Christmas Eve as it should be,” he answered with a grin, and Diane shook her head as they left the office. 

“You’re up to something, and I don’t know if I like that,” she said as they stepped inside the elevator. 

“Oh, I promise you’re going to love it,” Will answered and smiled at her, and Diane couldn’t help but feel curious now. 

When they finally made it to her apartment, Will noticed with glee that he had managed to make Diane feel as excited as him without even knowing what was going on. Though Will knew that Diane knew he had something planned, the knowledge that it was driving her nuts, positively, was all the more fun to him. With every horrible thing they had gone through in the last months, it felt like years since they had been this carefree and happy; neither of them even wasted one thought about Giddeon. 

“Come on, tell me!” Diane said as they walked to her door, but Will only laughed.

“No, not one word.” he insisted. 

“You know, someday I’ll have my revenge for this,” Diane said, turning to her purse to get her keys, but at that moment, the door opened. 

“Yeah, I know, but I’m actually more scare about her reaction when I blow this up,” Will told her, and Diane looked at him, confused for a second, but before she could say something, Kalinda spoke up. 

“Finally you’re here, come one, let’s get you inside so we can start,” their friend told them, and Diane blinked, confused. 

“What? Kalinda, what are you doing here? I thought you said you would celebrate with your friends?” she asked as they walked up the stairs. Kalinda’s smile only widened. 

“I know, and I am.” still not knowing what was going on, Diane stepped inside her house, only to almost not recognize it. It had undoubtedly not been decorated when she left it this morning, and there was a delicious smell in the air, and- Diane couldn’t believe her eyes when she looked through the door inside her living room. All her friends stood there and were apparently waiting for Will and her.

Diane wanted to ask how they were all here, but she was speechless. 

“Aunt Diane!” in the next moment, she was already holding her goddaughter in her arms, and Maia was hugging the life out of her. 

“Maia! Darling, I thought you were in Italy with your parents?” Diane asked, surprised, but not unhappy to be able to spend time with Maia. 

“No, well, I first planned to, but then Amy invited me to spend Christmas with her family. Then Will called and said there was a surprise Christmas Eve party for you, and I couldn’t say no,” Maia told her. 

“And where is Amy?” Diane asked, not spotting her goddaughter’s girlfriend under the guests. Maia blushed. Even though Diane had been the first person to know about her sexuality and was with her, holding Maia’s hand when she told her parents, her and Amy’s relationship was still new, and apart from Diane, nobody knew Amy, and they didn’t want things to be awkward. 

“Ah, well, we didn’t want to anyone to be uncomf-” 

“Maia, nobody here would have a problem with the two of you, and if that were the case, I would happily throw them out. Because in this house, nobody has to be afraid or ashamed of who they are, you are perfect just the way you are, and I love you, sweetheart. And I would’ve loved Amy being here too, so I expect the two of you to visit in the next few days!” Diane said and kissed Maia’s cheek, who couldn’t help the tears that welled up in her eyes. 

“Thanks, Diane, I love you too,” Maia whispered back before letting go of her aunt so she could welcome the other guests. 

“Wow, I can’t believe you’re all here,” Diane said once she had greeted everyone, and Simone handed her a glass of wine. She then turned around and looked at Will, “And I can’t believe you did this for me, I- thank you, Will,” she said and hugged him as best as she could with her glass of wine. 

Will hugged her close and smiled as he leaned close to her ear. “I just wanted to see you happy again and fill your home with good memories again,” he whispered, and Diane kissed his cheek, unknowingly to him; her heart skipped a beat at his words, and for a moment, she wished it was just the two of them. But her living room was full of people that wouldn’t disappear any time soon, so Diane reluctantly parted from Will and turned around to face her friends. 

“Well, thank you all for being here and a special thanks to Simone, who cooked us a heavenly smelling dinner. I- thank you!” Diane raised her glass, and they all followed her example, and their small Christmas party began. 

“Well folks, dinner is ready in about ten minutes! Oh, and, Will? Diane’s gift is getting rather impatient!” Simone announced from the kitchen around half an hour into the party, and Diane, who had been talking to Eli and Olivia, turned around confused. 

“My what?” 

“Oh shit, I almost forgot! Yeah, I have a little early present from you, just close your eyes. I’ll be back in a second,” Will said and disappeared into the kitchen. Kalinda stepped close to her and took Diane’s glass from her hands. 

“No need to worry, I promise you’ll love it,” her friend said with a smile, and as she trusted both Will and Kalinda with her life, Diane did as she was told and closed her eyes. A few moments later, she could hear the others around her whisper, and Diane had to use a lot of her willpower not to sneak a peek. 

“Alright, open your eyes,” Will said, and when Diane did, she was glad Kalinda had taken her glass from her because she sure as hell would have dropped it at the sight of the beautiful brown Labrador sitting next to Will. 

“I know you played with the idea of getting another dog after Justice. She belonged to Henry’s brother, she’s perfectly trained, but they’re moving and can’t take her with them, so I thought she could keep you company. Her name is Hazel,” Will said, and it took Diane a moment to understand this was real and not a dream.

“Will, I- oh my god, oh she’s beautiful,” Diane said, and she slowly knelt before the dog and let her sniff her hand. This was probably love at first sight because Hazel sniffed Diane’s hand, gave it a few gentle licks before bumping her head against Diane’s hand, demanding to be pet, which Diane did with pleasure. After the two of them got to know each other and Hazel had been given her fair share of scratches behind the ears from Diane, the Labrador went off to the other guests. 

Meanwhile, Diane hugged Will close and placed a small kiss on his cheek. “Thank you so much, Will...that was one of the most wonderful gifts someone ever got for me. She’s perfect,” Diane said, and Will couldn’t help feeling immensely proud he had had the idea and at the same time glad everything worked out and that he made Diane happy. 

Again the two were lost in their own world, unknowingly hopelessly in love with each other. And it took Will almost all his self-control to not merely kiss the woman he loved, who was currently in his arms and holding her so close was one of the best feelings in the world. Now it was also Will who wished for nothing more than to be alone with Diane. 

“I’m just glad you like her, and I like the idea that you’re not alone anymore.” in his mind, he added the part where he was glad there was no other man in her life. He was perfectly fine with the idea of a dog keeping her company and protecting her when he couldn’t, another man though? Not so much. 

The two of them didn’t realize that everyone else in the room, even those who didn’t see it until now, saw that something was going on between them. Well, at least all except for one watched the two of them with happiness. 

“Kalinda? What’s going on between Will and Diane?” Alicia whispered in Kalinda’s ear as she pulled her former best friend away from the others to keep the conversation between the two of them. 

“The fact that you ask me about it tells me you already know what’s going on,” Kalinda answered. 

“But- but Will and Diane?” the skeptical and slightly judging tone of Alicia’s words made Kalinda pull Alicia even further away into the hallway. 

“What? Because people who get raped don’t get to have relationships? Or because they’re partners at the firm? Like that’s never happened before?” Kalinda asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“No, of course not! That’s not what I meant...I mean…”

“Alicia, you chose Peter. End of story. And I still consider you my friend, and I like you, even though our friendship is different now. But if you ruin this for the two of them, then the two of us will have a real problem because they both deserve happiness and deserve each other. And Will and Diane...I hate to break it to you, but Will and Diane were Will and Diane even before I met them. It just took them this long to realize. You never had a chance with Will, like none of the other women had because he loves Diane and always has. You deserve someone who loves you and only you, and I don’t mean Peter, but I also don’t mean Will. Move on.” Kalinda told her seriously. 

And even though Kalinda’s words hurt, deep inside, Alicia knew her friend was right. Even though it hurt. She had chosen, and she chose Peter. Maybe it had been a mistake, but choosing Will would have also ended in heartbreak if what Kalinda had said was true. Maybe Kalinda was right. Alicia looked back inside the living room where Will had now laid his arm around Diane, and she had placed her head on his shoulder as they watched Diane’s goddaughter play with the dog. 

“You’re right...I have to go now. If I’m late to Jackie’s, then I’ll never hear the end of it. Would you tell the others?” Alicia asked as she went to get her coat. 

“Sure, Merry Christmas, Alicia,” Kalinda said, and Alicia gave her an honest but also sad smile. 

“Merry Christmas,” with that Alicia left. 

“Where did Alicia go?” asked Eli after Kalinda joined the party once more. 

“To Jackie’s. You know her, she doesn’t want to be late, or that old woman will hold that against her until the day she dies,” the investigator answered. 

“You told her to forget Will? Because Diane and Will belong together?” 

“Yes, I did.” 

“Good, she needs to hear from the honest person that there is no future for her with Will-” 

“Or Peter.” Kalinda interrupted him, and while Eli didn’t answer her, his eyes told her that he agreed with her. 

“Dinner is ready!” Simone announced, and they walked inside Diane’s dining room, where Simone had set the table. 

“Wow, Simone, you deserved yourself a vacation,” Diane said when she saw the delicious smelling food and smiled at her friend. 

“Oh, thanks very much, but it’s nothing special, Diane,” Simone said while Will frowned. 

“Wait a minute, did you just tell my housekeeper she could take a vacation?” he asked as he sat down. 

“Yes, she did, and that counts,” Simone said, and everyone else agreed with her, and Will shook his head. 

“Traitors,” he murmured under his breath. Diane waited until everyone sat around the table before she cleared her throat. 

“I just want to tell all of you how glad I am that I can call you my friends. After everything that happened…after everything Giddeon did...without every one of you, I wouldn’t be here. I can’t thank you enough, really, and that you are all here with me now means the world to me,” Diane raised her glass, “To us.” 

“To us!” the others echoed, and they began eating. Under the table, Will squeezed Diane’s hand, and she sends him a small smile. 

The party continued well into the night. It was almost one am when Kalinda and Cary left, the former accompanying a tipsy Cary after Will had introduced him to one of Diane’s best bottles of Scotch.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” Diane asked as the two stepped outside the door. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll get him home safe and sound,” Kalinda said with a grin. 

“Alright, Goodnight,” Diane said as the two turned around and walked away. Diane walked back inside the living room, where Will sat on the couch with Hazel next to him. 

“Oh no, the dog won’t lay on my couch,” Diane said and looked at her new pet, “Hazel? Your bed.” the Labrador looked at her and then at Will like she was waiting for Will to tell her it was okay to stay on the couch. 

“Hazel, your bed,” Diane repeated, and then the dog reacted, jumped from the couch, and laid down on her bed, which Will had brought with him, and was now next to the sofa. “Good girl.”

“Aw, come on, what’s the point in having a dog if you don’t cuddle with her on the couch?” Will asked as he stood up and walked over to her music collection on her shelf and searched for the one he had placed there days earlier. Finally, he found it.

“My house, my rules,” Diane answered and then saw he was searching for a CD, “What are you doing?” but Will didn’t answer, a few moments later a song started and Diane was pretty sure this wasn’t one of her CD’s. 

“May I have this dance?” Will asked, and Diane smiled as she took his hand, and they started to slow dance to the song. 

“This was a wonderful evening,” Diane said quietly after a while, and laid her head on Will’s shoulder, and his arms laid even more securely around her. 

“That it was indeed, we all deserved some time off, to feel good,” he said, and his heart started to beat so fast in strong in his chest that he feared she would feel it against his chest. They continued to dance until a new song came up, suddenly everything felt different, more intimate. 

“Who is this?” Diane asked. 

“Believe it or not, they’re called Cary Brothers,” they both had to smile at that, “The song is called ‘Blue Eyes,” he added. As they gently swayed to the song, Will tried to build up the courage for his next move, then he couldn’t help another smile when he saw that Hazel had sneaked on the couch again and watched them. 

“The dog is on the couch again,” Will said, and as soon as he said that, he wondered if he was manipulating himself, was he trying to distract her? What was going on with him? But Diane didn’t even look. Her face was still buried in the crook of his neck. 

“Who cares?” Diane mumbled, and Will suddenly stopped moving and held her in his arms when the third verse started. He gently lifted her face, so Diane was looking at him, he saw the question in her eyes and gathered up all the courage he had.

“I’m probably doing something very stupid right now,” Will murmured, but he gave her no time to say anything before he gently laid his lips upon hers. 

Time stopped. Nothing existed besides the two of them. For a second, Will feared that Diane would pull back, ask him if he was crazy, what he was doing, and he was about to pull away himself to apologize for what he did when Diane kissed him back. He couldn’t believe this was happening, he had never felt this happy in his life before. At this moment, it felt like he was able to fly, and that feeling would never fade as long as Diane was there.

After what could have easily been a couple of sunny days, they parted, but neither of them wanted to open their eyes, fearing it was all a dream. 

“Wow,” Diane whispered, “Where did this come from?” she asked and slowly opened her eyes and looked at Will, who did the same.

“I’ve been feeling like this for a while now, Diane, I...just couldn’t keep these feelings away anymore,” Will confessed and feared his heart would jump out of his chest any time now. 

“Will I…” Diane tried to find the right words because mostly she was feeling on cloud nine; she couldn’t believe that Will really felt more for her. But a small part of her, a dark voice in the back of her head that had been with her for over four months now, told her that this would work, that after everything had happened, she didn’t deserve this, didn’t deserve Will. Nobody in their right mind would want her after what Giddeon had done to her. 

“Will...I don’t...I don’t think this would work. You...you know what he did I- I’m damaged goods-” 

“Diane, I felt this way about you for a long time. What he did to you doesn’t matter to me, not like this. You are still the most beautiful and wonderful woman I know, and there is nothing in the world that could change this. Diane, I...I love you! I know these are big words, and you don't have to say them back, but I would never say this if I didn’t mean them, and I never meant them more in my entire life, give me a chance...us a chance,” Will said as he held her face in his hands and brushed the tears that ran over her cheeks away with his thumps. 

She wanted to tell him this was crazy, that there was a slim chance of them working out as a couple, that with everything going on in her life, she didn’t know if there was a future for them. And there were a million more things Diane should tell him, but she didn’t because after everything she went through, she deserved some happiness, there was only one thing her heart wanted, and that was Will. 

So she kissed him again.

Unknown to them, Kalinda and Cary had returned because the latter of them had lost his keys. Luckily they had found them on the top of Diane’s front stairs, but that way, they also witnessed what had happened. Kalinda was grinning from ear to ear and really happy for her friends. When they kissed a second time, they quickly left to give them some privacy again. 

“I bet next Christmas they’ll be married,” Cary said as they walked down the street. 

“Yeah, I give them half a year tops before he gets down on one knee.” 

“And I’ll be the best man,” 

“Keep on dreaming, that’s my job. You can be the flower girl.”

* * *

Hello, hello!

I hope you like your early Christmas present! And tell me in the comments what you think about it. I thought about splitting the chapter, but I didn’t want to keep this from you any longer, but this isn’t finished for quite a while! I wrote the thing with Alicia because I wanted to clarify that there won’t be any romantic triangle drama with them! (At least not in this story, but maybe you’re interested in another one?? Tell me ;) )

If you don’t happen to know the song Blue Eyes by the Cary Brothers, listen to it and tell me it doesn’t fit the two of them.

Thank you all for the wonderful comments on the last chapter. You are the best! I hope you and your families stay healthy! Take care of yourself, and despite everything, I hope you have a lovely Christmas. 

Love you all!


	10. Chapter 10

When Diane woke up the next morning, she was sure that the last night had been a dream. It was too good to be true. But then she turned around and saw Will lying next to her, still asleep and snoring softly. 

At least a part of what had happened yesterday was true, and when she thought about what Will had said...and the kiss… Diane’s heart started to beat faster at the memory. This was everything she had wanted. Even the memory of it felt so incredible, she had never thought this would be possible again after Giddeon. But here she was, in love with her best friend. 

Diane rolled over and placed her head on Will’s chest, enjoying the warmth coming from his body. She closed her eyes, and slowly her beating heart calmed down again, this was like a dream come true, and not even the voice in the back of her head could ruin this for her. This was where she belonged, right here in Will’s arms.

She had almost drifted off to sleep again when she felt a hand gently caressing her back. She looked up and saw Will smiling down at her. 

“Good morning Di,” he whispered, his voice still raspy from sleep, and Diane turned on her stomach and looked up at him, almost automatically a smile appeared on her face. 

“Good morning,” she said, and for a few moments, they just laid there looking at each other. Neither of them could really believe that this was really happening. “Tell me I’m not dreaming.” 

Will pushed himself down a little, so they were almost on eye level. His hand laid on her cheek, and then he stroked a strand of her hair behind her ear before he leaned in and kissed her. His lips were warm and soft, and good god, he was such a good kisser, Will’s arms pulled her even closer to him, and Diane ran her own hand through his hair. Diane couldn’t remember the last time she felt like this, if she had ever, and the only thing that made them pull away was the lack of air. 

“Wow,” her words were barely above a whisper, but Will smiled. 

“More than wow, and this is not a dream. Everything is real,” he said and kissed Diane once more, not able to hold himself back because not kissing her seemed like a total waste of time. 

“How long?” Diane asked after a few minutes of lazy kissing and just enjoying the moment. 

“What do you mean?” 

“You said you felt for me this way for a long time? How long?” she repeated, and Will thought about it for a second. 

“Seven years,” surprised Diane propped herself up on her elbow and looked at him with an almost shocked expression on her face. 

“Seven years?” 

“Yes,” he answered honestly. 

“And how? I mean, when did you notice?” 

“Stern’s 58’ birthday party. You wore that midnight blue dress with the low cut back, your hair was a little longer back then, and you had it pinned up, and you wore an elegant diamond necklace with matching earrings. You’ve looked breathtaking. Everyone was looking at you. We barely talked that night because...whenever I looked at you, it was like I had forgotten how to speak. I just knew that you were the one.” Will told her, and Diane couldn’t believe he remembered how she looked that night. 

“But all those other women...even Alicia?” she couldn’t help but ask, and Will sighed.

“I was a coward, Diane. I thought I would never have a chance with you, you’re beautiful, intelligent, funny, caring, you’re one of a kind, and I’m... I’m just me. So I tried to fill that hole in me...but none of them meant anything to me. Not Tammy, not Alicia, none of them, it was always you.” 

For a moment, Diane was a little overwhelmed by his confession. She couldn’t believe that Will had loved her for so long and had never said anything. But then again, she didn’t know if she would have given him a chance before she realized herself that she had harbored feelings for him. There were too many things they had to think about, back then with Stern, she was sure they wouldn’t have made it very far. 

“Will I...feel the same for you, I really do, but there are a lot of things going on. Giddeon is still out there, and I can’t promise there won’t be difficult situations with me.” Diane said, and Will knew what she was trying to tell him. 

“I know, and nothing I have told you before changes. I’ll be here, Diane, we can do this at your pace, we will do this at your pace, but I want to be by your side. Diane, we can do this together.” he said and placed another kiss on her lips. 

“Okay,” she murmured when they parted. 

“Okay?” this time it was Diane who kissed him. They both would have loved to simply stay in bed, relax and kiss, but then Will’s stomach rumbled loudly, and Diane broke the kiss and looked at him, it started with a smile, but a moment later, they laid in each other’s arms laughing.

“We better feed you,” Diane said before she reluctantly left his embrace and stood up with Will following her fast. 

“Good idea.” as they walked down the stairs, they found Hazel perched on the sofa using one of Diane’s pillows as just that, waggling her tail happily before jumping off to greet them. 

“You are going to clean my couch from now on,” Diane said after petting Hazel and letting her out the back door to the small patch of green she referred to as garden, which was now hidden under a thick snow blanket.

“Why?” Will asked as he made some coffee and stole some grapes from the bowl of fruits on Diane’s counter. 

“Because it’s your fault she thinks she can lay on the couch,” Diane said and gently nudged him in the side. 

“Seems fair,” Will answered before he leaned down and kissed her once more, “I can’t believe I can kiss you whenever I want now,” he said against her lips before claiming them again. Both their lips were already swollen from kissing, but neither cared about that. 

“You can...but what are we going to do with the firm? Or rather at the firm? There are a few people who would like to use this against us.” Diane said. 

“Well, we don’t have to prance around the office, but I don’t want to hide this, Diane,” Will said, “Do you want to hide this?” 

“I think I want to keep it from those who could harm us for as long as we can. But I want to do this the right way. So no, I don’t want to hide us, but there won’t be any make-out sessions when others are around,” Diane said. 

“And...when nobody is around?” Will asked with a grin and laid his arms around her. 

“Hm, maybe I can be persuaded,” she answered with a smile of her own, and there was another small kiss before they turned their focus on making breakfast. But then Diane remembered that she also had a gift for Will, with everything that had happened, she had almost forgotten. 

“Oh, wait, I almost forgot, I also have a gift for you!” Diane said and quickly left the kitchen to search for the gift. After searching in her drawer, she found the relatively small gift. She really hoped that Will would like it, it wasn’t really comparable to be gifted a living being, but she had tried. 

“It’s not a dog, but I still hope you like it,” she said as he handed him the gift, and with a smile, he began to open it. The smile vanished when he saw what was inside the box. 

“I-Is that? Is that a baseball...signed by Ryne Sandberg?” Will stammered as he looked at the baseball in his hands and back at Diane. Sandberg was Will’s favorite Cubs player.

“Yes, it’s a ball from the game against the Cardinals in 84,” she said, and Will’s eyes almost doubled in size. 

“Wait, 1984!?” he looked at the small date scribbled under the sign, and what followed was a sound that Will would describe as a euphoric scream; Diane would always say it was a squeal. 

“That’s a signed baseball from Ryne Sandberg from the Ryne Sanberg game from ’84!” he almost screamed, and in the next moment, he had wrapped his arms around Diane and whirled her around before he couldn’t help himself but kiss her again. If he hadn’t told Diane yesterday how he was feeling, it sure would have happened now. He was indeed the happiest man in the universe. 

“That’s the most amazing gift I’ve ever gotten Di, I- thank you, thank you so much, it’s amazing!” Will said, and Diane laughed, glad that Will liked her gift so much. 

Will liked her gift so much that the smile on his face didn’t vanish the whole morning. He was still smiling when they laid on her couch, with Diane lying between Will’s legs with her head against his chest and his arms around her and Hazel lying between Diane’s legs in a similar position, only that her dog had pillowed her head on Diane’s thigh.

“Before I forget, I would like to bring a gift to Teddy, you remember? That little boy I met when we visited one of the first victims of Giddeon? Would you like to come with me?” Diane said and turned her head so she could see how Will frowned a little. 

“He...is Giddeon’s son, right?” 

“Yes, but...Will if you met him, you’d understand. He is such a sweet child and I...I want to help Andrea. Teddy has no father, and he deserves a mother who loves him, and maybe with a little help, it’s not too late for Andrea. When we were there- I was this close to calling Child Services. They need help.” Will sighed and chose his next words very carefully.

“Diane...I don’t think this is a good idea. This is none of your business…” Will replied calmly, but Diane sat up and looked down at him nonetheless. 

“What do you mean? Why not?” she asked, and Will could easily tell that there was an argument lying ahead of them. For only admitting their feelings for each other twelve hours ago, they sure as hell had their fist argument pretty quickly.

“Well, I mean, think about it, why are you really doing this? Is this really about Andrea and the boy?” he asked as he sat up himself and turned the TV off.

“Of course, it is! What’s wrong in helping them?” 

“But you can’t just force yourself on them, Diane, you tend to do that, with good and wonderful intentions! But you don’t know them. You saw one scene in their life, maybe Andrea just had a bad day.” 

“I’m not forcing myself on them, and if you had been there, you would understand that she didn’t just ‘had a bad day’. She needs help! I’m doing this because I don’t want to ask myself in a few years if I could have turned both of their lives for the better!” Diane argued, not budging one millimeter from her point of view.

“Diane, be reasonable! This is not about the boy, this is about you-” 

“Yes! Because this could be me!” Diane yelled suddenly with tears in her eyes. And Will frowned at her. 

“What do you mean?” 

“This could be me, Will, I-” she paused and took a deep breath to calm herself down, “I was just lucky, Will, literally just lucky. I could be almost five months pregnant right now with Giddeon’s child, Teddy’s half-sibling, and it could have happened. He chose that day because there was a high chance of getting me pregnant. I did research on that drug cocktail he gave me. The Plan B pill wouldn’t have worked because of one of the drugs.

That’s why I want to help her because I could be her! I could be alone and pregnant, and I don’t know if I would have been able to do what she did. If things were the other way around and someone was out there who could help me, then I would want that help!” Diane told him, hating the tears that run down her face. Will, on the other hand, felt like he had swallowed lean. 

“No, you wouldn’t be like her, Di,” Will said and took her hand in his, “I would be right here next to you, I would be here if you were pregnant, and I would be here if you had been pregnant and chose to terminate. There is no way I wouldn’t have told you how I feel and that I wouldn’t be here,” he added and wiped away the tears on her face. 

“And that’s the reason I have to try to help a little bit,” Diane said and laid her hands on Will’s, which cupped her face, “Because I have you by my side, and everyone else. There is nobody like that in Andrea’s or Teddy’s life, Will.”

“Okay, I’ll go with you.” 

“Thank you,” she leaned forward and kissed him. A part of Diane also felt very relieved that she had finally told someone what had been bothering her for two weeks now. And that Will had told her he would have been here in every outcome meant even more to Diane.

* * *

Two hours later, the two sat in Will’s car, and Diane held the small gift in her hands, which was a new box of crayons and a coloring book. When they arrived in the street, Will took a look around and couldn’t help but worry that Andrea really needed help with what Diane had told him. Probably as much as anyone else living here.

“What did you get him?” Will asked as he parked the car, and Diane looked at the gift in her hands. 

“A new box of crayons and a coloring book,” when she saw the look Will throw her, she added, “When we were there he...told me he lost his yellow and was afraid to ask his mom because he didn’t want to make her angry.”

“Okay, that’s officially sad,” Will said, and Diane nodded. 

“That’s why we’re here.” they got out of the car, and inside the apartment building, they walked up the stairs, and Diane knocked on the door. They waited for a while, and Diane knocked again. She couldn’t help but worry a bit, then again, maybe they were at a friends place, Andrea had no family after all.

Just when Diane wanted to say that they probably weren’t home and wanted to leave the gift behind, the door opened, and like two weeks ago, the one who opened it was Teddy. Teddy only looked at them a second before he threw himself at Diane with a loud squeal.

“Diane!” she had to smile and leaned down to hug the little boy. She couldn’t help but notice, while the last time she was here, only the apartment was in a bad condition and even though his clothes had been unfitting, Teddy had been alright. Now, however, he looked even more unkempt, his clothes were dirty, and he looked and smelled like he hadn’t showered in a while.

“Hello Teddy,” Diane said as she let go of him with a smile. “I just wanted to say hello. Can we come in? This is Will; he’s my- best friend,” she said, and Will raised an eyebrow at her, and Diane just shrugged her shoulders. 

“Yes,” they stepped inside, and even here there was a noticeable smell of what Diane could only describe as a full garbage can, dirty clothes, and just old and sticky air.

“Where is your Mom, Teddy?” Diane asked and watched as Teddy shrugged his shoulders this time. 

“Out,” he shortly answered. 

“Did she say when she was going to be back?” 

“I dunno, later,” Diane had to suppress a sigh. She couldn’t believe Andrea would just leave her child alone on Christmas day, not to mention the danger. He could hurt himself, or what if someone broke in? It wasn’t that far-fetched. 

“Okay...well, I hope she doesn’t mind me giving you something, it seems like Santa got the wrong address because I found this gift for you.” the small boy made big eyes at her, and Diane could hear a little chuckle from Will.

“Really?” Teddy asked in awe as she handed him the gift. 

“Yes, really.”

“Can I open it?” he asked. 

“Of course,” Diane said and watched as Teddy opened the gift and his eyes grew big as he saw the new boy of crayons and the coloring book. He only had a small box with blue, green, red, and yellow, but this had all colors.

“Wow! So many crayons!” Teddy said and opened the box, he smiled from ear to ear. Diane also showed him the coloring book, and Teddy immediately began to scribble in it, trying out every color. 

Will couldn’t help but smile as he watched Diane and the boy, but some nagging feeling wouldn’t leave him alone. Something wasn’t right. What kind of parent would leave their child alone for such a long time? It certainly didn’t look like Andrea had left just a few minutes ago. So he decided to take a look around, starting with what turned out to be the kitchen. 

The pungent smell of rotting garbage was so strong Will almost had to gag, he quickly opened the window before he looked around and he didn’t like at all what he saw. The kitchen was empty, apart from the dirty dishes and trash lying around. Will opened the fridge for fun and only found a few remains of rotten vegetables, there was absolutely nothing to eat there. Will quickly opened every cupboard but was always met with the same picture. There was not even one crumb left behind; the only food Will found was a pathetic amount of Fruit Loops in a small bowl. 

Will left the kitchen and carefully, not to raise attention to himself, searched the other rooms, which were the bathroom and the bedroom mother and child shared. Apart from the general condition, there was nothing suspicious in the bedroom, both beds were made, but the drawer in which he assumed Teddy’s clothes had been was also empty. When Will inspected the bathroom, he found the boy’s clothes in the hamper, something was clearly not alright. Will had the feeling that Andrea hadn’t been here in a while. 

“Teddy, what did you eat yesterday on Christmas Eve?” he asked when he walked back inside the living room where Teddy and Diane were still coloring the book. Will noticed how the boy’s eyes were fixed on the paper before him, and he tensed. 

“Fruit Loops.” he answered quietly, still staring at the apple he was coloring, though his movement had something forced in it. Diane, on the other hand, looked at Will confused. 

‘I think she’s left’ Will mouthed at her Diane stared at him in disbelieve. It couldn’t be.

“And what did you eat today?” Will asked again as he knelt down next to the couch where the two were sitting. 

“Fruit Loops.” he whispered, and Diane’s heart broke. She laid the crayon in her hand away and gently took Teddy’s hand in hers. 

“Teddy, please look at me,” she said gently, and the boy did as he was told, and she could see tears in his eyes. “Teddy, where is your Mom?”

“I dunno,” he repeated.

“Okay, when was the last time your Mom was here, Teddy?” Will asked. 

“Monday,” Diane couldn’t believe what he just said, surely she must have understood him wrong; Andrea couldn’t have left her son alone for six days.

“Did you say Monday, Teddy?” and to her horror, he nodded.

“I’ll call the police,” Will said, and Teddy looked at her with fear in his eyes. 

“No, I didn’t want to be bad! I’m sorry!” he cried, and Diane quickly hugged him. 

“What do you mean, sweetie? You weren’t bad, you did nothing wrong,” she said as she tried to calm him down. 

“Mommy said when I’m bad, the police will take me away!” 

“No, Teddy, they won’t take you away! I promise you I’ll stay with you, okay? We’ll call the police so they can find your Mom, so they can help. They won’t do anything to you, I promise Teddy.” Diane said, and slowly, Teddy began to calm down in her arms. She hoped that Andrea had a good reason for what she had done because if she had left her son alone for six days without a reason, then she couldn’t guarantee that she wouldn’t lock Andrea up herself. 

“Teddy, when was the last time you ate something beside Fruit Loops?”

“I dunno...that was all I found.” They had to take him to the hospital to get checked out, it was a miracle he was still alive!

“Will, we have to get him checked out at the hospital!” Diane said, and Will nodded. 

“I’ll tell them to send someone from CPS over to the hospital,” he whispered at her and then continued to talk to the police. Diane stood from the couch and took Teddy with her to the bedroom. 

“Alright Teddy, I want you to pack all the things you need for a little sleepover tonight, okay? Until we have found your Mom,” she said, and Teddy nodded, he walked around the room and packed his Teddy bear and an old book. He left the bedroom and returned with an old toothbrush for children, which looked more like the ones Diane used for cleaning.

“What about clothes Teddy?” 

“I don’t have clean ones.” he mumbled. 

“Alright, Teddy, I’ll see what we can do, okay? Get some clothes and a pajama, I’ll wash them.” Diane said, and Teddy nodded before he went to get some of his clothes. Everything this child needed and held dear fit in one small backpack. 

When they walked back inside the living room, Will just finished the call with the police. Diane didn’t like the look he wore on his face at all. “Teddy, pack your crayons and the coloring book,” she said and walked over to Will, who leaned close, so there was no possibility for Teddy hearing his next words. 

“When I wanted to hang up, the cop told me to wait, they...just got an update on a Jane Doe... it’s Andrea, she’s dead.” Diane couldn’t believe what she just heard, it couldn’t be true.

“Will, tell me that’s not true, please,” she begged him and felt tears burn in her eyes, but fought them with all her will because she didn’t want to scare Teddy.

“I’m sorry, they couldn’t tell me exactly what happened, but it seemed like it was an accident.” 

“Oh my god, are they really sure?” Diane couldn’t believe it. What was she supposed to tell Teddy? How could she tell him his mother was dead? And what would happen to him? He had no living relatives. 

“He said it was the DNA results, but maybe they-” but he was interrupted when Teddy walked over.

“I’m ready,” Teddy said and looked up at them, Diane took a deep breath before she looked down at him and forced a smile on her lips. 

“Wonderful, we’ll go to the hospital now, Teddy, they will look if you are really healthy and we will wait there for the police, okay? Maybe they...can tell us then where your Mom is.” she said, and Teddy took the hand she offered him. He trusted her, and she just lied to him. 

They drove to the Chicago General, where someone from the police and CPS would show up, and the forensic medical institute of Chicago also happened to be next to the hospital. Diane felt sick when she thought about the fact that they were basically driving Teddy to his dead mother. All the way to the hospital, she thought about how she could possibly explain to Teddy that his Mom had died.

When they stepped inside the hospital, Diane could feel how Teddy held her hand even tighter. Will stepped up to the front desk while Diane knelt down to Teddy. 

“Are you scared, Teddy?” he nodded at her and stared at their hands. With her other hand, she stroked his long blonde hair behind his ear. “The Doctor only wants to make sure that you are okay. You’ve been alone for a long time, honey, but I promise I will stay with you, okay?” Diane asked, and Teddy looked at her with his big brown eyes that woke a maternal instinct in her Diane never knew she had.

“Really?”

“Really.” He laid his little arms around her, and Diane lifted him up in her arms. He was lighter than she thought; she really hoped that he was healthy, well as healthy as he could be after being left alone for six days. 

“Okay you two, one of the Officers is a friend of a nurse. He explained the situation to her, and the Pediatrics is quiet at the moment, we can go there now,” Will said as he stepped over to them, and Diane nodded before they made their way to Pediatrics.

“So you must be my next guest,” they couldn’t even say anything before a Doctor came over to them with a friendly smile on her lips. A few families were there, but most of them looked like the children were here because of an in-patient stay and not some emergency; Diane couldn’t imagine what this must be like, and she couldn’t, not now.

“Yes, this is Teddy, Teddy? See, that’s the Doctor,” Diane said when she focused on the woman in front of them. She carefully put him down, and Teddy looked up at the Doctor.

“Hello,” he said shyly. 

“Hi Teddy, I’m Doctor Morgan. Would you come with me to that room over there? We have some really funny Nemo wallpaper, do you like Nemo?” she asked, and Teddy nodded. Diane leaned down to him.

“It’s alright, you can go Teddy, I’ll wait here, okay?”

“No, I don’t wanna,” Teddy said and looked a the Doctor in front of him, “Can Diane come with me?”

“She can come with us, but she has to stay behind a room divider, okay?” Dr. Morgan answered, and together they walked over to the examination room. 

“Just a check-up?” the Doctor murmured when Diane walked inside. 

“Yes, he was alone for six days.” the Doctor nodded. During the examination, Diane could only listen half-heartedly to what Dr. Morgan did and what questions she asked Teddy. She still thought about how she could explain to Teddy that his mother would never come back, his mother dead, his father- the realization hit her with the force of a train. Teddy had a living relative, his father. 

“Teddy, I-I have to call a friend of mine real quick, okay? I’ll be right back.” 

“Okay,” came the quiet replied, and Diane slipped out of the room. 

“What?” asked Will as he saw the shocked expression on Diane’s face. “Diane, what’s going on? Is it Teddy?” he continued to ask her, but Diane shook her head. 

“We have to find out if Andrea stated Teddy’s father in any Document, his birth certificate, or anything else that may prove who his father is,” Diane said and pulled out her phone to call the only person who could find out. 

“What? Why?” Will asked confused. 

“The only living relative Teddy has is his father. If Child Services know or find out who Teddy’s father is, then Giddeon could find out and take him. I think he didn’t know about him, and that’s why he never tried to get to him, but if he finds out-, Will I won’t let him lay one hand on this boy!” Diane said, right before the person she called picked up. 

“Merry Christmas, Diane,” Kalinda said, but Diane had no time for small talk. 

“Kalinda, I’m sorry, but it’s really important, Andrea is dead. You went through Andrea’s files again after we were there. Did she mention in any way who Teddy’s father is? On his birth certificate or something like that?” Diane asked, and Kalinda grew serious in an instant. 

“No, I checked everything. Giddeon wasn’t on the birth certificate or anything, but I can check again if you want me to,” a huge weight was lifted off Diane. If he was not mentioned on the birth certificate, then Giddeon had no legal rights, and then Child Services couldn’t find out who the father was. 

“Thank you, that would be great, just to be sure, but this already sounds promising.” Diane said. 

“Okay, but how did Andrea die?” asked her friend, and Diane gave her the summary of what had happened. “Okay, I’ll take a look at this myself,” 

“You don’t have to, Kalinda-”

“But I want to, Diane,” there was a short pause before Kalinda continued. “I’m really happy for you and Will, Diane. You two deserve some happiness in your lives.” 

“H-how do you know?” Diane couldn’t help but ask and could imagine Kalinda’s smile at the question. 

“Cary lost his key’s yesterday, so we walked back and searched for them. We found them on your stairs and...well, we saw you.” 

“Of course you did...but thanks, it means a lot coming from you, Kalinda,” Diane said, and despite the situation, when she looked at Will, she still couldn’t believe the last 24 hours had really happened, and her heart fluttered in her chest. 

“I know. I’ll call you back later, bye.” 

“Thank you,” with that both hung up. 

“And?” Will asked, and Diane sighed. 

“Kalinda is pretty sure Andrea stated no father on Teddy’s birth certificate, but she’s going to check again just to be hundred percent sure.” 

“Okay, well, at least some good news today. A Detective called me back, it’s Andrea, they are a hundred percent sure. They think it was an accident, but they’re also searching the apartment to rule anything else out. But from what the Detective said, they are pretty sure it was an accident. It seems like she was drunk, fell and hit her head...she died from the head wound.” Will replied, and Diane could only shake her head. 

“Oh my god...I- how am I supposed to tell Teddy?” she asked with tears in her eyes, and Will pulled her into a hug. 

“You don’t have to do this at all, Diane,” he said, but Diane shook her head. 

“I do, I won’t let somebody tell Teddy that his mother is dead, who doesn’t care about him or what happens to him.” she argued. 

“Alright, we’ll find a solution for this,” Will said and then gently pulled away from their embrace. “What else did Kalinda say?” he then asked.

“Well, it seems like Cary and Kalinda know about us,” she said, and he raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“What? How?” 

“Cary lost his key’s on my front steps. They saw us kissing when they found them.” Will shook his head. 

“That only happens to us, but those two don’t really count, we would’ve told them anyway or not?”

“Yes, but it would have been nice to tell them ourselves,” Diane said and then looked back at the examination room, “I better go back inside. I don’t want Teddy to worry,” she said, and Will nodded but pulled her in for a kiss. 

“I’ll go and try to get something to eat for him. He must be starving.” Will told her after they parted, and Diane pecked his lips once more for that. 

“Thank you,” 

“No need, I’ll be right back.” and with that, Will left, while Diane also walked back inside the examination room. 

“Teddy? I’m back,” Diane said, and at that moment, Dr. Morgan pushed the room divider away so she could see Teddy again, who just pulled his shirt over his head. 

“Good timing, we’re finished,” the Doctor said, and Diane walked over to Teddy, who looked so small and fragile. 

“See, you did it, Teddy, it wasn’t bad, right?” she asked, and he smiled a little at her. 

“No, it was okay,” he answered. Diane then leaned down and took his precious teddy bear from his backpack, which Teddy immediately hugged close. Diane looked at Dr. Morgan, who had watched with a small smile on her face. 

“Is everything alright?” she couldn’t help but ask even though Diane knew that she wouldn’t get no answer because she was no relative, but the woman surprised her. 

“I shouldn’t do this, but...I think I have to make an exception here. He seems okay, a little underweight but nothing too serious. But he can’t return to- that environment.” Dr. Morgan said, just stopping herself from saying ‘his home’. 

“Thank you, I really appreciate this,” and the other woman nodded. 

“Diane?” she quickly looked at Teddy. 

“Yes?” 

“Where is Mommy?” for a second, Diane thought about lying to him, but she couldn’t do it. He had to find out sooner or later, and she’d rather do it now than risk some stranger telling him what had happened.

“Teddy...I have to tell you something...the police called me...Teddy, your Mom won’t come back, she had an accident...and she died Teddy.”

“But Mommy said she’ll be back!” Teddy said and stared at her while his eyes filled with tears and his bottom lip began to quiver.

“And she tried Teddy, I know she tried...but sometimes accidents happen and there is nothing we can do, I’m so sorry Teddy,” 

“She won’t come back?” 

“No, Teddy,” Diane said and pulled Teddy into her lap. Only a second later, he began to cry heartbreakingly, and all Diane could do was hold him. Rock him slightly in her arms as tears also run down her own cheeks. This was not fair, none of this should have happened. 

Diane couldn’t remember how long she sat there, Teddy had stopped crying a while ago but had been so exhausted he had fallen asleep in her arms. But Diane didn’t even think about leaving. She would stay right here and hold him in her arms until he woke up again, even if that meant sitting there the whole night.

“Diane?” it was Will who walked in with a sandwich and a juice box in his hands. He had watched from the window how Diane had held the boy as he cried, but since he didn’t want to overwhelm the kid and honestly had no idea what to do, Will had stayed outside and waited.

“He cried so much he exhausted himself and fell asleep.” Diane said quietly as Will sat down next to the bed on a chair. 

“Diane...Child Services are going to be here any minute now. You know that they will take him with them.” new tears began to burn in her eyes. 

“Yes, but I’ll stay with him until that happens Will, he’s all alone now...I...I can’t simply leave him alone.” 

“Diane, there is nothing you can do...you can’t take him.” She wanted to curse Will because he knew her so damn well, and she wanted to argue him on it, because why not? But he was right. They wouldn’t allow her to take care of him. Giddeon was still out there, and there was also their firm, she had barely any free time left, and who was she kidding? She had no idea how to care for a child. Not really; Maia had sometimes stayed with her since she was a baby, but never longer than two nights. This would never work, and Diane knew this, but the reason it hurt so much to accept was that she wanted to do it.

Like his words had been some sort of announcement, a somewhat stressed looking woman that practically screamed Child Service appeared before the window, accompanied by Dr. Morgan. The two women stepped inside, and the woman stepped forward. 

“Hello, my name is Ruth Thomas, I’m from the Cook County Child Protective Services. The police informed me of an orphaned child, who was neglected, I take this is the child who are you?” 

“My name is Diane Lockhart, I...I knew Andrea, the deceased mother of Teddy.” Diane said, and the woman nodded before she looked at Will. 

“And you are?” 

“Will Gardner, Diane’s partner,” Will said, and the woman nodded. 

“Alright, I’ll have to take the chil-”

“Teddy, his name is Teddy.” Diane interrupted her, and Ruth nodded.

“Of course. I’ll have to take Teddy with me; there is an emergency foster family not far from here who could take him. Would you please wake him up?”

“Before I do that...I would like to ask if it would be possible to visit him? He doesn’t have many people who care about him. Actually, there is nobody,” Diane said. 

“I’ll see what we can do about that...you were the lawyer who found him?” 

“Yes, both Will and I, I wanted to give Teddy his Christmas gift,” 

“Okay, that speaks for you, but we should go now. Would you please wake him?” Diane felt terrible doing this and couldn’t even explain why. She gently shook Teddy. 

“Teddy? Teddy, wake up, Darling,” Diane said, and after a moment, the boy in her arms started to stir, but at the same time, his arms tightened around her neck. “Teddy, please wake up; there is someone here that wants to meet you,” 

“Mommy?” he asked and looked at her with tired eyes, which were also red and puffy. 

“No Teddy, this is Ruth Thomas, she’s a real nice Lady, and she found a place where you can stay.” Diane explained, and Teddy looked at her and then at Ruth. She let him slide from her lap and stood as well, but Teddy stood close to her and almost pressed himself against her.

“Hello Teddy, like Diane said, my name is Ruth, and I work with a lot of kids like you. I found a real nice Family, you can stay with them for a while, would you like that? There are two other kids with whom you can play. That sounds good, doesn’t it?” Ruth said, but Teddy didn’t answer immediately. 

“They would love to meet you, and I bet they have some cookies left for you,” Ruth said and held her hand out to him, but Teddy pressed himself closer to Diane. 

God, this was a nightmare, Diane thought as she knelt down and looked at the boy. “Teddy, it’s okay you can go with Ruth now, she’ll take good care of you, okay?” 

“But I wanna stay with you!” Teddy said immediately, and her heart broke. 

“I can’t take you with me, Teddy I-” 

“I’ll be good, I promise!”

“Oh I know, sweetheart, this-” 

“Teddy you can’t go with Diane, I’m sorry, she can visit you, but you can’t stay with her.” Ruth said and took his hand, Teddy tried to get away, but Diane made him look at her. 

“Teddy, go with her, please, it’s all going to be okay. I will come and visit you-” she said desperately as Ruth took the now crying child in her arms. 

“No! Diane, I wanna stay with Diane! No, I don’t wanna go!” Teddy screamed, and Diane pressed her hands on her mouth as she watched Ruth carry Teddy away, tears running down her face. God, this was wrong, why was this happening? None of this should be happening.

Diane should be home. She should be home with Will, watching stupid Christmas movies, she should spend the days in his arms and enjoy the little time they had before they would be thrown back into the chaos they called their life. And Teddy should be home with his mother, backing cookies and everything, he should be a child. But he was taken away to the home of strangers and would land in the Foster Care System. 

She felt how Will pulled her into his arms, and she felt a little bit comforted by that. Diane wanted to forget what had happened, she wanted this all to end. After a moment, Diane heard Will’s phone start ringing. He let it ring, but once the call would have jumped to voicemail, the other person called again. 

“Who the hell is this?” Will asked when he took the call, “Kalinda? Slow down, yes, she’s here,” he said, and Diane looked up at him as she wiped the tears off her cheeks, “It’s Kalinda.” she took his phone and held it to her ear. 

“Kalinda?” 

“Finally, Diane, did CPS take Teddy already?” Diane had to swallow the lump in her throat. 

“Yes, they just took him away.” 

“Diane, I’m at Andrea’s apartment! She made you Teddy’s Guardian! We found a notarial certificated letter on which Andrea names you as Teddy’s Guardian if she is dead or unable to care for him. 

“What? Really?” Diane couldn’t believe what she just heard. This couldn’t be true. Why would Andrea make her Teddy’s Guardian? She had only seen him one time, and Andrea hadn’t liked her at all, it made no sense. 

“Yes, really,” Kalinda said, and suddenly Diane’s body moved on its own. With the phone still in hand she ran outside and out the Pediatrics, she could still hear Teddy crying, though he didn’t scream her name anymore. 

“Wait! I’m his Guardian! Andrea named me as Teddy’s Guardian, you can’t take him.” Diane called out, and Ruth turned around. 

“What did you say? You- Teddy!” before Ruth could finish the sentence, Teddy had already wormed himself out of her arms and ran back to Diane, who held her arms out. The second she embraced him tightly, Diane swore to herself to do everything she could so this little boy in her arms had a happy life. Then she looked at Ruth, who looked like she had no idea what to do.

“I’m his Guardian...and I will fight everyone who tries to take him from me.”

* * *

Hello, hello!   
I wanted to make a small cute Lockner chapter, then this happened. I hope you like it, I do even, though it came as a surprise even for me. Let's see how little Teddy will change the lives of Diane and Will and everybody else.   
I really hope you liked the chapter! Merry Christmas to you all (again, I didn't plan to update this early)   
Love you all!


	11. Chapter 11

_ Diane,  _

_ If you read this, then it means I'm dead. It feels strange to write this letter, but I know it's the right thing to do. I probably owe you an explanation of why I'm doing this, but there is something else I have to tell you first. I can't do this to you without telling you the truth, because you of all people, deserve the truth.  _

_ Andrew Giddeon raped me, and as a result of that rape, I had my son Teddy. I know it seems gruesome of me to appoint you the Guardian of my son when he was fathered by the same person who also raped you. You can choose to give him away to a foster home; I wouldn't blame you, how could I, after I have failed as a mother myself? But I'd like to explain.  _

_ Teddy talked nonstop about you; from that day on, he would ask about you all the time because you were able to do in forty minutes what I failed to do in four years. You made him happy. You made him smile. I thought I could do this, I thought I could raise him, but then I was alone, and every time I looked at Teddy, I saw his father. I couldn't ignore it, and I couldn't forget it, and Teddy paid the price.  _

_ I hurt him, and I wasn't a good mother. I hope you can be a better mother for him because he deserves it. I love him, I really do, but sometimes love isn't enough, and because I love him, I have to do this. You're the right one for this, I just know. Teddy likes you, and I know you can be the mother he needs. I hope one day he can forgive me for what I did, I don't have the right to ask this of you, but maybe you could make sure he doesn't forget me? Please take good care of him, he deserves a good mother.  _

_ And Diane? Catch that son of a bitch and make him pay for what he did to all of us.  _

_ Andrea _

Kalinda had given her this letter the first night Diane had taken Teddy in. She had found it with the other one in which Diane had been appointed Teddy's Guardian. It had been a bizarre day, and everyone involved just wanted it to be over. Teddy had been so worn out by everything that on the ride back to Diane's, he had fallen asleep, and Will had to carry him to her remaining guest bedroom. 

But in the end, everything had worked out.

Ruth Thomas had not worked against them and didn't cause them any trouble as the court-appointed Diane as Teddy's legal Guardian after accepting the letter and checking Diane. The court had also granted her the option to adopt Teddy after two months. 

So that's how Diane came to sit at her desk in her home office two weeks later, reading the letter for what felt like the thousandth time. Was she really ready for this? What if she was unable to care for Teddy? What if she couldn't do this? What if Giddeon came back? What if he hurt Teddy? 

"I can practically hear you worrying up to here," Will said from the doorway, and Diane looked up at him as Will walked up to her and leaned against her desk. 

"Just tell me I'm doing the right thing," she said quietly, and Will took her hand in his. 

"Diane, I told you, you should stay away from this, and I told you, you couldn't take Teddy with you. You proved me wrong on the first day Diane, you can do this, I know you can. You're the best thing that could have happened to Teddy. And while I might not be a father figure or anything, I'll be there to support you, no matter what. I love you, Diane," Will said honestly, and Diane stood up and kissed him. 

"Thank you. Really, thank you, Will. I know this isn't easy for you or rather that this isn't what you have in mind when you think about a relationship, but-" 

"Diane, I love you, and I want to be with you. Teddy isn't an obstacle, he really isn't, I just need time to get used to this, okay? But I won't leave you for anything," Will said. 

"I love you too, Will," Diane said, and for a moment, Will's eyes widened in surprise. 

"Diane, you don't have to say it back, you-"

"But I want to, I want to say it because it's the truth, it's what I feel for you. I love you, Will. I love you because you are the most amazing man I know, and you love me for who I am, even after everything that happened. You still look at me the same way, and I don't think you can ever understand how much that means to me, how much strength you gave me. I can trust you; that's why I love you," Diane said, and Will pulled her in for another kiss, but even deeper now. 

Their arms were wrapped around each other, and Will pulled her as close against him as possible. He couldn't remember when he had been this happy. Will really didn't want Diane to feel obligated to say I love you back, but hearing it from Diane's lips caused his heart to practically jump out of his chest in happiness. He couldn't believe that three little words could have such an impact on one's life.

But every moment had its end, and theirs came in the form of a little boy. 

"Diane?" they quickly broke apart just as Teddy pushed the door fully open and stood in the doorway in his new pajama and clutching Fuzzy in his arms. 

"Teddy, what's wrong?" Diane asked and knelt down to be on eye level with him. 

"I had a bad dream," Teddy mumbled, and tears shimmered in his eyes. 

"What was the dream about, sweetie?" Diane said as she embraced him, and Teddy hid his face in her neck. 

"Mom," he whispered, and Diane held back a sigh and stroked over the boy's back as she stood and held him in her arms. Diane turned around and looked at Will, but he simply nodded and signaled her he would take a shower. Diane walked back inside Teddy's room and laid him back in his bed, sitting down next to him. 

"Did Mommy love me?" Teddy asked suddenly when Diane pulled the covers a little higher. For a moment, Diane was so surprised by what he said that she didn't know what to say.

"Of course she loved you, Teddy, very much," Diane said and stroked over his head, "Why do you ask, Teddy?" 

"Mommy always cried," he answered, and Diane couldn't help but sigh. 

"I don't know why your Mom cried so much, Teddy, but I know that it had nothing to do with you. Sometimes things can make us sad, or even memories. But that doesn't mean we don't love the people around us." she tried to explain to Teddy, who seemed to think about what she said. 

"Okay," he whispered but nibbled at his bottom lip. Something Diane noticed he did when he was unsure about something or anxious. 

"Teddy, nothing bad is going to happen, alright? You're safe here, and I'm right down the hallway. It's time to sleep now, okay, sweetie?" Diane whispered and wanted to get up. 

"No! Please stay!" Teddy said, almost desperate, and looked at her with his big brown eyes and Diane wanted to stay strong, she really did, and it would have worked.

"Please," at this whispered word, she knew she was fighting a losing battle. 

"Okay, I'll stay here until you fall asleep," Diane answered and shifted a little, but Teddy pulled at her arm.

"Cuddle?" Diane was a little surprised. While he had never shied away to hug her or when Diane had offered comfort, Teddy hadn't really initiated more or closer contact. Until now. 

"Really?" she asked, and Teddy nodded, Diane smiled a little as before she carefully laid down next to him. In the next moment, Teddy snuggled up against her and closed his eyes. She slowly stroked over his head with her left hand, and almost automatically, she began to hum some melody. And she stayed even when Teddy was fast asleep again.

This was crazy, this little boy turned her life upside down, and she was okay with it. She had always wanted children, but first, she wanted to focus on her career, she had to focus on her career, her father had been a well-respected man in the Chicago law world, a lot of people had watched her, waiting for her to fail. Then Diane had played with the idea of starting a family, confident that she could manage her career and a family had the same time. The problem turned out to be the men. She had never found the right one, even when she thought she did, it had only ended in heartbreak. 

The wish for a family had always stayed her best-kept secret, so it was never something that others could use to hurt her. But then she looked down at the sleeping boy next to her, she turned on her side and, carefully not to wake him stroked his hair out of his face. Maybe this was her chance, to get something she had denied herself for so long because she would do everything for Teddy.

"You're going to be a wonderful Mom," Will said quietly, and Diane turned her head and found him standing next to her. 

"I'll try my best," she whispered. 

"That's why I know," Will whispered back and held his hand out. Diane carefully got up and tucked the blanket a bit higher over Teddy before placing a kiss on his forehead before taking Will's hand and leaving the room to go to bed themselves.

* * *

The elevator doors opened to the 28th floor, and Diane stepped out of the elevator holding Teddy's hand and ignoring the looks many of her employees still threw them as they walked towards her office. It was still a strange sight to them, and Diane couldn't blame them. It wasn't like Teddy was with her every day since he came to live with her two months ago; usually, Simone stayed with him, but today she couldn't. 

"Good morning Diane, Mr. Gordon called; he has a question about his case and would like you to call him back around ten when he is in his office." her assistant Lisa said with a smile. 

"Good morning, and thank you, Lisa. Anything else?" Diane answered, but her assistant shook her head.

"Not for now," she answered and then smiled at Teddy, who waved at her. Diane and Teddy then walked inside her office, where Teddy immediately ran to his play area next to her desk. 

"My blue train!" he said excitingly when he saw the toy he had desperately searched for the evening before. It had taken Diane a lot of patience and work to tuck him in after he had been so riled up. 

"See, I told you it wasn't Hazel," she replied with a smile as she watched him begin to play. 

"I'll say sorry tonight!" Teddy said, and Diane laughed as she sat down at her desk. When he had come home with her, he had been a little shy around Hazel. It wasn't that Teddy was scared, but he never really interacted with a dog before. It had taken two days, and now boy and dog were palsy-walsy with another, and Diane still caught Hazel in Teddy's bed even though he knew she wasn't allowed on the beds.

"I bet Hazel would love that," she said and began to sort her files for the day. Only a few minutes passed before Kalinda walked inside the office. 

"Kalinda!" Teddy jumped up to hug what seemed to be his third favorite person in the world. Funnily enough, Kalinda was even more awkward around Teddy than Will, which was saying something. Still, Diane knew her friend was warming up to the boy even though Kalinda insisted she was only being nice. 

"Hey, munchkin," Kalinda said and ruffled through Teddy's long blonde hair before he ran back to his toys.

"Look, I found my blue train!" Kalinda did her best not to frown at that. 

"That's...great?" Diane chuckled. 

"Teddy, give Kalinda and me a moment, okay?" 

"Okay," and he continued to play, having learned that most of the things Diane did at work were boring adult talk.

"What is it, Kalinda?" she then asked, and her friend leaned against one of the chairs in front of Diane's desk.

"You told me to keep track of your Gordon case. I followed him and an investigator by the others side and saw him-" she threw a look at Teddy, "Err, disappear with a professional...worker," 

"Oh great, that would explain why he called this early. Thank you, Kalinda." her friend nodded and turned to leave. 

"Bye, Kalinda!" Teddy said and waved at her. Diane saw the smile she tried to hide. 

"Bye, munchkin," with that, the investigator was out of the door.

"Can I go to Will?" Teddy asked, but Diane shook her head. 

"He's not here, Teddy. Will is in court, he's going to be here for lunch, so when he gets here, you can ask him, alright?" Teddy beamed at her.

"Yeah!" he cheered, and Diane couldn't help but be fascinated by how such small things could cause so much happiness to a child. Despite everything Teddy had gone through, he was such a happy and lovely child, and Diane was glad that slowly Teddy began to heal, that there was still hope he could have a happy childhood.

The rest of her day went by very unspectacular. She had an annoying discussion with Mr. Gordon over the phone, having to tell him that yes, sleeping with hookers was a bad idea and that the other side would use that against him, and then other tedious paperwork to go through.

The highlight had been lunch with Will, he had picked Teddy and her up and went to get something to eat in a nice little restaurant. Teddy had been eager to tell him all about his day and how he had finally found his blue train, and Will had played the super interested and acted, she had no other word for it, like a Dad. 

While he may not see it himself, Diane had, she had seen how Will had changed around Teddy. In the beginning, he had been almost nervous when he was left alone with him, not knowing about what he could talk with Teddy, or how exactly. Be he had warmed up to the boy, getting to know him, and with every day, Will grew more comfortable around Teddy. He even started to initiate games and everything, and one time Diane was sure she had seen him searching for a baseball glove for kids on the internet. 

But she wouldn't talk to him about it, he would overthink it, and Diane wanted to see it for himself; she wanted to give him the time he needed. 

"Can we go home?" Teddy asked while he laid next to her desk on the floor, coloring one picture after another, kicking his feet in the air. 

"Not yet, I still have some work to do, sweetie," Diane answered and heard him sigh almost comically, which caused her to smile as she went over the bill in front of her. 

"It's boring," Teddy said, suddenly stood beside her and stroked his hair out of his face, "What are you doing?" he asked. 

"Working, and I know it's very boring, I think so too. But I have to do work, so we can buy food, clothes and of course toys." Diane explained, and Teddy frowned at her. 

"And Hazel's food?" 

"Yeah, her food too." 

"Than it's okay," Teddy said in a way that sounded like she now had his permission to continue to work.

"Thank you very much, and I promise I'll hurry up so we can get home real quick, okay?" 

"Okay!" at that moment, Lisa walked inside her office, with a new wave of letters and documents to sign. 

"Look, Lisa, that's you!" Teddy said and picked up one of the many scrabbles and presented it to her. Her assistant smiled and took the picture from his hands; he was a real charmer and had wrapped many assistants and partners around his finger. 

"Oh, thank you! That's so sweet of you, Teddy; I'll put it up on my fridge as soon as I get home," she said, and Teddy happily jumped back to this play area. Diane looked at the letters, and one caught her eye. Her name was written on it by hand, and there stood nothing else on it, not her full address or a sender. Carefully Diane opened the envelope. Inside were a letter and a picture. 

When Diane turned around the picture, she felt her blood ran cold and a shiver of fear run down her body. It was a picture of Will, Teddy, and her eating lunch today, and there was blood smeared all over it. Then her eyes shifted to the letter, also tainted with blood, on which only two sentences stood.

_ I warned you, Diane! I love you! Why did you do this? I told you not to be with Will! You'll pay for this, and I will hurt you and everyone around you!  _

All color drained from her face, and her heart started to beat faster in fear. Giddeon. Giddeon was somewhere near her. Had he delivered the letter himself? Was he still here? A million things went through her mind as she reread the letter. 

"Lisa. Get Kalinda immediately." Diane said, her voice calm but urgent, causing her assistant to frown at her. 

"Diane? What's-" 

"Get Kalinda now," she looked up at her assistant, silently telling her something was seriously wrong, who then nodded and turned around to run out of her office and search for the investigator. 

"What's wrong?" Teddy asked, and Diane got up, making sure she didn't get any blood anywhere and that Teddy couldn't see anything before she knelt down in front of the little boy to be on eye-level with him.

"Teddy, listen to me, everything is okay, but I want you to stay with someone you know at all times until I say otherwise, okay? It's really important." Diane told him, trying to keep her voice as calm as she could; the last thing she wanted was to scare Teddy. 

The boy nodded, but before he could say something, Kalinda, Lisa, and surprisingly Will came running into the office. 

"What happened?" Kalinda asked while Will quickly walked over to them. 

"Are you okay?" he asked, worry written all over his face. 

"Yes, we're okay, but I received a letter and a picture from Giddeon... it's a picture of us having lunch today," Diane explained, and Will stared at her in shock while Kalinda immediately went over to the desk to inspect the letter and the picture.

"Lisa, who delivered the letter?" Kalinda asked once she saw there was no full address, just Diane's name.

"I-I don't know...I didn't- no one delivered anything, it was under the other letters." Lisa said, and Kalinda nodded. 

"I'll go to the mailroom, call Agent Blake!" Kalinda said before she hurried out of the room, and Diane did as she was told though her fingers were shaky.

"Diane?" 

"Agent Blake, I just received a letter from Giddeon and…a picture he took from me today…" 

"We're on our way. Has anyone seen him at your firm? Do you know if he was there, or was it somebody else?" the Agent asked, and Diane could hear a car starting in the background.

"No- I- Kalinda is trying to find that out right now."

"Okay, stay right where you are, is someone with you?" 

"Yes, Will is here...but I had to bring Teddy to work with me today, I-" 

"Okay, I understand. You don't leave the room, we'll be there in a few minutes." with that, Agent Blake hung up. Will had distracted Teddy with one of his toys, but once he saw she had finished the call, he quickly got up.

"Are you okay?" Will asked once Diane put her phone away and stepped closer to her. 

"I don't know...yes, I just worry. What if he is or was here? He followed us today, he was able to take a picture." Diane said, and Will took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. 

"I'm sure he just wants to scare us. He wouldn't be so stupid to come here personally."

"Well, he succeeded, I am scared. And how do you know that they would even recognize him?" Diane asked. 

"Because I personally gave every security guard a picture of him, and they have to look out for him until we know certainly he is either locked away or dead," Will said, and Diane couldn't believe what she was hearing. 

"You did that?" 

"Of course, I told you I would do everything in my power to protect you," he said. The next minutes felt like hours until Kalinda, followed by the FBI Agents walked inside her office. 

"Are you okay?" Agent Blake and Miller asked at the same time. 

"Yes, it was just a little shocking," Diane said and then looked at Kalinda, who threw a look at Teddy. 

"Maybe we shouldn't discuss this here," she said, and although Diane wasn't really sure about that, she knew that whatever they discussed wasn't for Teddy's ears, and at the moment, two FBI Agents were with them. Also, if Kalinda thought Giddeon was still somewhere near, she would react differently. 

"Okay," she said with a nod and then waved Lisa inside her office. "Lisa, would you please watch Teddy for a few moments? We'll be in the back in a few minutes, okay? Don't let him out of your sight, okay?" Diane asked, and Lisa quickly nodded. 

"Yes, of course," 

"Thank you," Diane then looked at Teddy, "Teddy, Will, and I have to talk with the others for a moment, okay? Lisa will stay with you, and you have to stay inside my office, okay? We'll be right back!" Diane told him and placed a kiss on his forehead before Teddy nodded at her. 

"Okay," they quickly walked inside the conference room, and all eyes were on Kalinda once Will had closed the door. 

"The good news is, it looks like Giddeon wasn't the one who left the letter here. Because the letter had no stamp etc., it was either brought directly to the mailroom or on Lisa's desk. I think I also found the man who dropped off the letter, it looks like it was a client from Lee, the police is searching for him to ask him who gave him the letter and told him what to do with it." Kalinda explained. 

"Well, at least that sounds like good news," Miller said, but Diane shook her head as she sunk down on one of the chairs. 

"It doesn't feel like good news. He took a picture of us at lunch! He knows about Teddy. He threatened to hurt anyone close to me!" Diane said and felt how Will laid a hand on her shoulder. 

"You're right, and we're going to increase the number of protection for you. You won't go anywhere without at least one Agent." Blake assured her. 

"Don't you have anything on where he is?" Kalinda asked, and the Agent released a frustrated sigh. 

"Nothing clear, but the last trace we had of him was somewhere up in Wisconsin. But nothing on where he is exactly or where he is heading. It could be that he is back here, but it's also a possibility that he hired someone to watch you." Miller explained. 

"And what about the blood?" Diane asked.

"We're going to test it and see if it's even human," Blake quickly said and looked at Diane. "We will do everything to protect you and Teddy,"

"I just- it's not only about me anymore. Teddy has nothing to do with this-I can't let anything happen to him." Diane said and laid her hand on Will's, which was still on her shoulder. 

"We'll figure something out, but for now, we'll increase the number of agents just to be sure. We won't allow him to get close to you. Okay? And I also think it would be good for you to go home now. We're going to drive you." Blake said, and Diane nodded. 

"Thank you," Will said, and together he and Diane walked back towards her office. A few lawyers had gathered around in the waiting room between their offices, and Lisa was just handing something back to one of them when they walked inside her office. 

"Teddy?" Diane asked when he wasn't playing in his play area, expecting him to come running from the part of her office where her conference table stood. But he didn't, and it was quiet, no sound was heard, and Teddy sure as hell wasn't quiet while playing.

"Teddy? Where are you?" Diane asked again, maybe he was hiding, but once she walked further inside her office and looked around the corner, she saw nobody there. Teddy wasn't in her office. There was a simple explanation for this. She was sure there was because this couldn't be happening. 

"Lisa? Lisa, Where is Teddy?" Diane asked as she hurried back outside her office, and there was a moment of calmness before she saw the confused look on her assistant's face. 

"What? He's playing-" 

"No! He's not in my office!" Diane said and thought her heart would stop when she saw the panic on her employee's face. 

"B-but he was right here! I looked after him not a minute ago! I just wanted to-," but Diane didn't hear it anymore, frozen in shock. 

"Kalinda! Teddy is not in Diane's office! We have to search for him." Will said to their investigator, who was about to leave the conference room, then he turned around again and looked at Diane. "He's probably just wandered off; we'll find him!" he tried to reassure her, but Diane ignored him. She ignored everyone around her as she hurried inside Will's office and searched for Teddy. 

Giddeon couldn't have gotten inside this building! He couldn't have taken Teddy. It was impossible; her brain refused to accept that, she couldn't accept that. When she saw no trace of Teddy in Will's office either, she ran out of his office and in the direction of the other offices. 

"Has anyone seen my son? Teddy?" Diane called into the room, not stopping or waiting for anyone, her eyes scanning the room for the little blonde boy. Not caring about anything else than her son, she also hurried inside Alicia's office. 

"Have you seen Teddy?" she blurted out, and Alicia quickly hung up on whoever was on the other end of the line. 

"What? No, what's going on?" she asked and stood up when she saw the panic on Diane's face. 

"Giddeon sent me a letter, we talked with the FBI in the conference room, and Teddy was supposed to be waiting in my office, but he's not here anymore, and we can't find him!" Diane said quickly and desperately but still trying her best not to panic. 

"I'll help you search for him, but you have to calm down-" 

"Don't tell me to calm down, Alicia! Giddeon took a picture of us having lunch today and practically dowsed it in blood, and now my son is nowhere to be found!" Diane said. 

"But panicking won't help you find him either," Alicia answered, and then Will ran inside the office.

"Teddy's not on this floor, Kalinda and Miller are looking for him downstairs, and Blake is talking with the security. We'll find him, Di, but we have to concentrate; where could Teddy have went to?" Will asked, and Diane wanted to get angry and shout, but the last bit of her sanity warned her that he was right; getting angry or panicking wouldn't help. She had to focus. 

"I know, I try to, I really do! But I don't know!" 

"Could he have used one of the elevators?" Alicia asked. 

"Well, I- I don't know maybe!" Diane said, and together, the three of them made their way to the elevators as fast as possible. 

"Okay, we have to search on every floor, Diane and I take the-," but Will's words were drowned by loud crying once the elevator doors opened. Inside was Cary, and in his arms was a crying Teddy. 

"Mama!" Teddy immediately reached out for her with his arms, and without thinking, Diane quickly took him into her arms and hugged him as close to her as possible without hurting him. 

"Thank god, Teddy! Are you okay?" Diane said as she hugged her son close, who clung to her like she would disappear if he only let go a bit. "Shh, it's okay. I'm here, everything is okay, Teddy," Diane said over and over again to calm him down. 

Diane had never been so scared before in her life, not even when Giddeon had raped her or stalked her. She could manage that Giddeon was after her and trying to hurt her, but she couldn't even handle the thought that he might hurt her son. Because that was what Teddy was, her son. 

Teddy might be her son only for ten weeks, but he would stay her son for the rest of his life, and if Giddeon would dare to make the mistake of getting too close to her son, then Diane wouldn't stop at anything in the world to make him pay. 

"Cary, I- where did you find him?" Diane asked as soon as Teddy had stopped crying and was only whimpering a little, his face buried in her neck. 

"I just got back from court, and I wanted to take the elevator upstairs from the parking area and found Teddy crying near the elevator. He said he wanted to look at the cars but fell and scraped his knee." Cary explained, not really understanding why everyone was so worried. 

"Oh, thank god!" It had nothing to do with Giddeon, Teddy had only been bored, and Diane rarely felt this kind of relief. Will had immediately called Kalinda, who now came rushing towards them from the stairways. She quickly told them that Miller informed Blake and then explained to Cary why everyone had been so stressed out. But Diane carried Teddy back inside her office.

"Teddy, are you okay?" she asked once they sat on her couch, and Teddy rubbed his tears away with his sleeve. 

"My knee hurts," he said with a small hiccup. Diane looked down and saw that his pants were dirty at his knees, and there was a little spot of blood on his right knee. 

"But nothing else?" she asked, and he nodded. 

"Okay, I love you, Teddy, and I was so scared when you were not in my office anymore. Don't wander off again, yes? I don't want you to get hurt again, Teddy," Diane said as she cupped his face all red and puffy from crying so hard. 

"I'm sorry, Mama, I only wanted to see the red car!" he sniffled. 

"I know, honey, but you have to tell someone when you want to go anywhere. All of us were worried about you," she explained calmly, and then Will stepped inside her office. 

"Hey buddy, are you okay?" Will asked as he knelt next down to them and laid his hand on Teddy's shoulder. "You got us really worried there for a moment,"

"I'm okay," he answered.

"We're going home now," Diane stated, pressing a kiss down on his forehead. 

"I'll get Blake," Will said before he leaned close and pecked Diane's lips, not caring about anyone who might see them. Teddy only leaned close to her and wrapped his arms around her neck. 

"I love you, Teddy, and nothing will ever change that," she whispered in his ear. 

"I love you too, Mama," he whispered back, and only now did she notice that he called her Mama. 

Now the tears that shimmered in Diane's eyes were one of happiness. She closed her eyes, tilted her head, so her face touched his head. Apart from Will, there was nobody she loved as much as Teddy, and she would give her life for both of them in a heartbeat.

* * *

Happy New Year, my lovely readers! I hope you had a wonderful start in 2021!

Here is my little new year's gift for you! I really hope you like it! So while everything is a little quieter, Giddeon isn't giving up and still close enough to make life difficult for our favorite couple! How long until he strikes again? Nobody knows. 

Just a little reminder, I started my new job today, so I might not be able to update as much as in the last few days!

Please tell me what you think about the chapter, and of course, thank you for the amazing responses on the last chapters, seriously, you're the best, and every single one of your comments makes me so happy!

Love you all!


	12. Chapter 12

Diane walked inside Dr. Lindstrom’s therapy room and sat down in one of the comfortable chairs, and Dr. Lindstrom did the same, smiling at her. “How are you, Diane?” he asked, the smile not leaving his face, and Diane couldn’t and didn’t want to hide her own smile. 

“If you would have asked me that when I started therapy, I honestly wouldn’t have thought feeling like this would be ever possible again.” she answered, and Dr. Lindstrom nodded. 

“Well, you have put an extraordinary way behind you, Diane, really, it’s been almost a year, and the progress you made is one I don’t see very often.” he said honestly, and Diane clasped her hands together and closed her eyes for a second. 

“I’m feeling truly happy.” 

* * *

Will was woken up by a weight on his arm and voice speaking. Blinking his eyes open and lifting his head from the pillow, it turned out the weight on his arm was Teddy, who had apparently sneaked into the bedroom and crawled on their bed. 

“Mama? Mama, wake up!” Teddy said somewhat quietly as he looked at his Mom and knelt on Will’s arm. 

“Shh, don’t wake your Mom Teddy,” Will quickly said, stifling a yawn and sitting up as quietly as he could, carefully pulling his arm from under Teddy. Last night hadn’t been a good night for Diane, she had great trouble falling asleep, and there had been another nightmare. Will glanced at the clock on the nightstand and saw it was only shortly after seven. He wanted Diane to have a few more hours of sleep. 

Teddy turned around to look at Will and was a little confused, “But I’m hungry,” he answered. Oh damn. While he was getting better and more comfortable at being alone with Teddy, he was still a bit nervous, and cooking was also not his best discipline, but a look at Diane made the decision easy.

“Alright, alright,” Will quietly got up and lifted Teddy into his arms before leaving the bedroom so Diane could sleep. 

“Why can’t I wake Mama up?” he asked as they made their way downstairs and into the kitchen. Hazel only looked up from her place on the couch before going back to sleep.

“Because your Mama didn’t sleep that well last night and should sleep a bit more, Okay?” Teddy nodded fiercely at the words, and Will sat him down on the kitchen island, looking at the little boy in the dinosaur pajama and with the tousled, long blonde hair. 

“What do you want for breakfast?” 

“Pancakes!” 

“Err, what about scrambled eggs and beacon?” Will asked hoping that Teddy could be persuaded to eat the only thing Will could actually cook.

“Okay! Can I have some hot cocoa too?” 

“Sure buddy, you can also help me with the eggs,” Will said and prepared everything else they needed, “Alright, take an egg, and then you hit it on the side of the bowl so it has a crack and you can easily pull it apart,” Will explained as he showed Teddy how to do it. The boy nodded and took an egg, trying to follow exactly what Will had done but ending up smashing the egg against the bowl. 

“Oh no!” Teddy exclaimed and looked truly upset that he had smashed the egg, but Will quickly consoled him. 

“Hey it’s okay, Teddy, that’s no problem! That was already really good. I didn’t know you were that strong buddy, let’s try it together, so you get a feeling for it, alright?” 

“Alright!” after the third egg, he got the hang of it, and the fourth he did alone and managed to do it right. 

“Hey! Good job, high-five!” Will said, and Teddy cheered happily as he high-fived Will. 

“I did it!” 

Twenty minutes later, the two of them sat at the kitchen island eating their breakfast, Teddy with a cup of hot cocoa and Will with a cup of coffee. 

“That’s yummy, can we do that again?” Teddy asked, and Will grinned. 

“Sure we can,” 

“Do you like me, Will?” Teddy asked suddenly, and Will looked at him surprised. While he was still not the official father figure for Teddy, he never wanted to make the boy believe that he might not like him. In fact, Teddy was one of the few kids he liked that wasn’t related to him.

“Of course I like you, Teddy, you’re really important to me...I know maybe I’m not that good at really showing it, but you are, and I’ll work on it, okay?”

“Okay, I like you too,” the little boy said with a big smile, and Will ruffled his hair. 

“Thanks, it means a lot, kiddo,” Will answered with a smile of his own.

* * *

“This was a wonderful idea,” Diane said as they strolled through the park on this nice April afternoon, their arms linked together, Will held Hazel’s leash in his other hand as the dog padded along with them. They watched as Teddy jumped into the puddles of last night’s rain in his rubber boots and rain pants, giggling madly. 

“Yeah, sometimes I can have good ideas too,” Will answered with a smile, and Diane nudged him in the side. 

“Like I never tell you you have good ideas.” Diane stated, and Will chuckled, knowing exactly that it drove her crazy when he said something like that.

“I do...but let’s talk about something else. How was the first week with the kiddo in preschool?” After waiting for almost three months, though Diane knew they still had been lucky, Teddy had been able to start preschool on Monday. 

The first few days had been a little strange and difficult for both Diane and Teddy, it had been yet again a new situation for them, and both needed a little time. Teddy had never gone to preschool or anything of sorts and had never really played with the same kids regularly, and, of course, leaving Diane was not easy either. But yesterday, on Friday, he had already been excited to go to preschool, and she was amazed once again how strong and resilient Teddy was. 

On the other hand, Diane had been equally nervous about giving Teddy into the care of people that weren’t friends. Apart from the usual things she had to worry about as a mother, for example, if Teddy would find friends or like the preschool in general, she also worried that Giddeon would use Teddy to get to her. But the school had been really understanding of the situation and assured her they would keep a close eye on Teddy. 

“The first few days were hard on both of us, but yesterday I already barely got a goodbye kiss before he was running off to playing. Now I’m the only one having a hard time; he told me he can’t wait until it’s finally Monday again. But I’m also glad it’s me and not Teddy.” she said with a small smile, but Will knew it wasn’t easy. He also regretted that he hadn’t been there for her and Teddy that much the past week because he had been almost nonstop in court. 

“Hey, you’re doing an amazing job Diane, really, that boy adores you, and he is the luckiest kid on the planet to have you as a mother. And with everything that has happened, it’s okay to feel that way and that it is not that easy to simply give him to the care of strangers.” 

Diane leaned closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder while her eyes were fixed on Teddy, who turned around himself as he stomped in a small puddle, so the water splashed onto his rain pants. “I know...but hearing it from you really helps,” 

“I’m always here when you need me, Di,” Will answered and wrapped his arm around her. 

“I know, just don’t think I’m the only one Teddy adores; you’re equally important to him, Will. I know none of this was really what you wanted, but with every day, you did your best and got better and better with Teddy.” Diane said and looked up at Will, and to her surprise, he smiled.

“I used to be really scared by that idea...a family was never something I planned for because I was sure I wasn’t good enough, that I would mess up. But you and Teddy? You mean the world to me, and I’m not scared of the idea of a family anymore.” Will said and pressed a kiss to her cheek. 

“I didn’t want to tell you at first because I didn’t know how you would feel about it, but Teddy told me he wished you were his dad.” Diane confessed to him, and Will couldn’t help but feel incredibly proud and happy, despite the little bit of fright about what that really meant that was still left. 

“Really?” 

“Yes, more than once, actually.”

“Wow...you know what? I think...I think I’m ready to try being a father.” and as Will looked at Teddy, he knew he really meant it, he came to love the boy like his own and would do anything for him and Diane. 

“Teddy? Would you come back for a second?” the little boy came running back to them and smiled as he brushed his hair from his face. 

“What is it?” Will crouched down in front of Teddy, so he was on the same eye level with him. 

“Hey buddy...I want to ask you something. You know I love your Mom very much, right?” Teddy nodded, “And I love you too, you and your Mom are the most important people in my life, and I want to ask if you would want me to be your Dad?” Teddy’s eyes grew big. 

“You gonna be my Dad?” he asked, and Will nodded. 

“If you want to,” he said, and Teddy nodded. 

“Can I call you Dad?” Teddy asked, and Will smiled.

“Yes, of course,” in the next second, Teddy already threw himself at Will, who quickly embraced him. Will couldn’t believe how happy this reaction made him, he did love that child, and when he looked up at Diane, he saw how she wiped away some tears in her eyes. They were undoubtedly the strangest family constellation she had seen in a while, but they were still family, and she wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. 

* * *

“Teddy! Come one, we have to go!” Diane called up the stairs and turned around to get Teddy’s backpack from the kitchen, hearing Teddy run down the stairs, and a second later, he came running into the kitchen. 

“Ready!” he said but missed one of his shoes. 

“Where is your left shoe, Teddy?” Diane asked, barely able to keep the frustration out of her voice; she had to be in court in an hour and couldn’t be late. 

“Hazel had it,” he said matter-of-factly, and Diane handed him his backpack before gently pushing him out of the kitchen and into the hallway. 

“Wait by the stairs,” Diane said shortly before she quickly went to Hazel’s bed and searched for his left shoe. It didn’t take long, but she also found a few of his building blocks and pencils. Taking his shoe, she hurried towards the stairs to put Teddy’s shoe on and finally get going. 

“Come on, we have to hurry, Teddy,” Diane said and took his hand. 

“Why do we have to hurry?” Teddy said a little grumpily after they got into the car and Diane drove down their street. 

“Because I really have to be in court in an hour, and I have to drop you off at preschool first, sweetie,” Diane answered and threw him a look via the rearview mirror. “I didn’t want to be so harsh, Teddy, but there’s a lot I have to think about right now,”

“It’s okay.” Teddy said with a small smile. “Will Daddy be home again tonight?” he then asked, swinging his legs in his car seat. He had been a little disappointed when Will hadn’t been there this morning. Even though he was accustomed to his parents not living together, ever since Will became his Dad officially, he understandably wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

“I think so, but I’m not sure. I’ll ask him when I see him later,” Diane answered, and Teddy nodded. 

When they finally arrived at preschool Diane, and Teddy hurried inside, where they were greeted by his preschool teacher. 

“Good morning Teddy, Good morning Diane!” Ms. Lauren said and smiled at them. 

“Good Morning, Ms. Lauren, so Teddy, Simone is going to pick you up today, okay? But I’ll do my best to be home as fast as I can. Have fun, sweetie!” Diane said, also looking at the teacher, who nodded, and then she leaned down to press a kiss to his cheek, while Teddy smiled at her. 

“Okay, bye, Mama!” 

“Bye!” Diane turned around once more by the door and blew Teddy a kiss, who waved at her with a grin. Being a mother to a four-year-old was definitely not easy; Diane lost almost count how many times she was late to work, and her home had never been as messy as it was these days. Her phone rang a few minutes later, and Diane took the call via the hands-free device. 

“Di?” Will’s voice echoed around in her car. “Where are you?” he asked.

“I’m almost at court, but I had to drop Teddy off first.” she answered. 

“Okay, I just wanted to check-in, everything okay?” 

“Well, I’m late for the hundred time in the last months, but he’s four, so there is no point in trying to explain to him that I have to work, and that’s why we can’t play before, after, or during breakfast.” 

“What a shame, why not combine things? Even better, why not combine breakfast, playtime, and bath time?” he asked.

“Ha, ha, easy for the one to say who can disappear to his own apartment at the crack of dawn before the whirlwind wakes up.” Diane said with a smile, but the pause on the other end confused her a little bit. 

“Do you want to change that?” Will asked seriously, and Diane frowned.

“Change what?”

“The separate apartments.” Will said, and Diane was at a loss of words for a moment.

“Do you want that? You don’t have to, I know you...I know you love Teddy, but that is something different. I don’t want you to feel obligated to anything, especially not because I’m complaining.”

“Diane, I love you, and I love Teddy I don’t feel obligated to anything. I suggested that I want to be a part of your life and Teddy’s life because I want that. I want to try, really do, Diane, I want to do this the right way and not part-time or anything,” Will told her seriously; in the background, she could hear the usual commotion of the court.

“Okay, then let’s talk about it later.” 

“You don’t want it,” Will said, and Diane could hear the disappointment in his voice. 

“No, I want it, Will, really. That’s why I want to talk about how we do it after court, I want to win this case, and I want to talk about us moving in together with a happy mood.” Will chuckled. 

“Alright, I see you in a few minutes, I love you.”

“Yes, I love you too,” that she hung up and continued her drive to court. But all she could think about now was what Will had said. Even though it wouldn’t be much of a difference since Will already spent most of his time at her place, it would still make an impact in all of their lives. It had been a long time since Diane officially lived together with a partner; the last time had been with her boyfriend she had when she made it to Partner at Sterns firm. He had dumped her a year later because she was more successful than him.

Of course, she knew that something like that would never happen with Will. Diane didn’t know if she had ever felt something like that for anyone else, she did love Will with all her heart, and he was the first man she could really imagine the rest of her life with. But this was not only about her anymore, there was a little boy she had to think about too, every decision she made also affected his life. 

Then again, Will would never do anything to hurt her or Teddy, she trusted him with her life, and they both knew each other better than they did themselves. And when Diane was really honest with herself, then this was really what she wanted because she missed Will when he wasn’t there, and she wanted to spend every moment with him. A smile laid on her lips as Diane held at a red light, she couldn’t wait to move in with Will, and her smile only widened when she imagined how Teddy would react.

* * *

When Will came home after this long day, he had to stifle a small yawn as he unlocked the door and stepped inside Diane’s apartment, which was theirs for a whole week now. It had been surprisingly easy to get the important stuff from his apartment or, better said, the few things that weren’t already at Diane’s, and thanks to the popular neighborhood he had lived in, his place was as good as sold. 

After he locked the door, he got out of his coat and shoes and walked inside the living room, his tie, which he had loosened as soon as his last meeting was over, still around his neck. A smile laid on his lips when he found Diane asleep on the couch, Hazel curled up by Diane’s feet looking up and happily wagging her tail when she saw him. 

“Hey girl, you keep your family safe, hm?” Will said quietly as he sat down next to Diane and petted the dog, who clearly enjoyed the attention. But then he turned his attention on Diane and smiled at how peaceful she looked, beautiful as always. At moments like this, he still couldn’t believe his luck that Diane returned his feelings, and his heart was still beating fast when he looked at her.

“Di? Wake up,” Will said as he gently shook her, and her eyes flew open, but when she saw it was him, her eyes closed again. 

“You’re home,” Diane mumbled and smiled. 

“Yeah, finally, I thought I would never get out with that mountain of paperwork, but I finished most of it,” Will said and leaned down to press a small kiss against her lips. 

“How was your evening?” 

“Actually pretty quiet. He was a little sad you didn’t make it home before bedtime but got over it pretty quickly, which might be because I said you would take him to the park tomorrow.” Will chuckled at her words but nodded. 

“Sounds fair. I actually look forward to it.” 

“Wonderful,” Diane said and then pulled him in for another kiss. With every second the kiss grew more heated, Diane pulled Will even closer to her as her hands ran through his hair. Will held himself up with his right hand while his left carefully caressed Diane’s exposed skin in the almost familiar route. It took him a lot of his self-control not to let his hands wander too much. He wanted to give Diane control of the situation. 

It was not like they hadn’t gone further than kissing in the last months, they had explored each other’s bodies a few times, and with each time, Diane had grown more and more comfortable. They undressed in front of each other, they shared showers, they had even pleasured each other with their hands, but oral or actual sex was still something they hadn’t tried yet.

Until now, it had been something both had been perfectly fine with. With what she had been through, Diane was still very proud of herself. Being close to a man in an intimate way was something she hadn’t thought would be possible for a long time. But with Will, it felt just right, he made her feel beautiful again, maybe more than she had ever thought she was before. 

And now she wanted to take that last step, not because she felt like she had to, but because she really wants to, she wanted to enjoy every part of their relationship, she wanted to be finally able to fully accept her body again, every aspect of it. And Diane didn’t want her last ever sexual encounter to be what Giddeon had done to her, an act of violence. For her, it was the last step of defeating him, of breaking the chains he had put around her, then her life was fully back under her control. 

That was why she broke their kiss and made Will look at her, “I love you,” she whispered, and Will smiled before he pecked her lips. 

“I love you too,” he murmured, and she had never believed these words as much as she did now. Her heart was beating fast in her chest, but this time in the best way possible. 

“Make love to me,” Diane quietly said, still looking into Will’s beautiful eyes. She had actually never referred to sex as making love before; it had never been making love, it had been sex, or even just fucking, but nothing that felt so special, and what Will and Diane had was so, so much more than that. She anxiously waited for his response, and for a second, she thought he wouldn’t want to, but then he spoke. 

“Are you sure?” Will asked, and he did ask without judging because he cared, because he wanted to know if this was what she really wanted or what she thought he wanted. Diane nodded. 

“Yes, I am.” and he saw that she really meant it, that this was what she wanted.

“You know you can always say stop...promise me you will say stop when you’re not comfortable anymore,” Will quietly asked her because he couldn’t bear the thought that Diane might force herself to stay quiet because she didn’t want to disappoint him or anything. 

“I promise,” Diane said, and she did mean it. Will kissed her one last time before he got up and pulled her with him; the blanket that had previously been draped over her fell back on the couch and revealed her long legs in the old pair of jeans. “Not really the outfit I wanted to wear when this happened,” Diane admitted, but Will pulled her in his arms. 

“This is perfect…you look beautiful no matter what you wear,” he said before he kissed her again and then made their way upstairs. They had gone up to her bedroom a thousand times before, but both felt their hearts beating in their chests and tingling all over their bodies. 

They stepped inside her room, and Will locked the door behind them. There was a little boy in the house after all, and when he turned around and saw Diane waiting for him by the foot of the bed, he was sure he was dreaming. Then he stepped close to her again and knew this wasn’t a dream when he put his hands on her hips and laid his lips on Diane’s. 

Slowly, as they kissed, his hands found the hem of her shirt and caressed her warm skin as they run further up her body until he pulled the shirt over her head and threw it blindly at the chair in the corner. Any other time, with any other woman, he would probably be embarrassed that he was already growing hard. But the feeling of her warm, soft skin under his fingers, her lips on his and Diane’s breasts in the simple black bra brushing against his clothed chest with every breath she took, turned him on more than a meaningless fuck with any other women possibly could. 

Diane carefully pulled Will’s shirt from his pants as his hands continued to caress every inch of her exposed skin, and then ran her hands up his body to slowly unbutton his shirt. Every now and then, her hands slipped inside his half unbuttoned shirt, over his chest, her fingers combing through his well-groomed hair there and down his body with every button she opened. 

Will slipped out of his shoes as she pushed his shirt over his shoulders, and then his lips left hers and placed delicate kisses along her jaw and neck, making her gasp for air. 

Their ever-busy hands roamed each other’s bodies, but while Will was opening her jeans, Diane reached behind her to finally get rid of her bra. As soon as she shrugged it off her body, his hands had stopped what they were doing, and she heard him groan before he gently cupped her breasts, making her moan in return. 

Their kisses grew even more fierce than the previous ones as Will delicately massaged her breasts that fit perfectly in his hands; the feeling of her hard nipples brushing against the skin of his hands sent little shocks of pleasure through her whole body. But Diane wasn’t idle either and palmed the growing bulge in his pants, causing Will to growl against her lips and push his hips against her hand. 

The teasing continued for a while until both couldn’t wait anymore. Will finished opening Diane’s jeans and pushing them down her legs as she managed to open his pants and carefully pull the fly over his hardness. He then used the momentum to pull his pants and boxer briefs down his legs and step out of them, getting rid of his socks at the same time, leaving him naked in front of Diane. 

Diane pulled him in for another kiss, feeling him press against her belly before one of her hands sneaked between his bodies, and Will thought he would go insane when her delicate fingers wrapped around him and stroked him to full hardness with ease. 

Suddenly Will lifted her off the ground, but Diane quickly overcame her surprise and wrapped her legs around his hips as he carried her over to the bed and gently laid her down on it. They kissed once more, Diane’s legs still around his hips, but then Will broke the kiss and trailed his lips down her body. Diane’s breath hitched in her throat, and she arched her back when Will licked over one nipple before gently sucking it into his mouth. 

One of her hands ran through his hair while the other was grabbing onto the sheets. A small whine escaped her when he let go of her, but when Will placed kiss after kiss down her body, Diane’s moans increased in number even if she had to unwrap her legs from Will. He slid further down the bed between her legs, and when he reached her slip, he continued placing kisses down the inside of Diane’s thigh, as he slowly pulled the already wet fabric with him until he sat up and threw the very last piece of disturbing clothing away. 

As Will looked at Diane, he was sure he had never seen a woman more beautiful than her in his life. Not able to stop himself, he laid down again, still close to her womanhood, and as he kissed his way closer and closer, he also watched Diane closely and silently asked for her permission, which was granted to him with a quick nod. 

Diane had to press a hand over her mouth to muffle the loud moan that escaped her in fear she could wake Teddy. There was no way to hold back when his tongue expertly worked on her clit and sent small fireworks off in her body, but Diane wasn’t the only one enjoying it, as her taste had Will practically leaking. 

Too soon for his liking, Will felt how Diane tugged him back up to her, but on the other hand, he didn’t mind because both wanted to feel each other now. They kissed once more, with Diane tasting herself on Will’s lips and tongue while he positioned himself between her legs. 

He broke off their kiss once again and looked into Diane’s eyes, “You okay?” he asked, his voice low. Diane smiled at him. 

“Yes, I love you,” she answered, and Will smiled back at her. 

“I love you too,” he couldn’t really remember if he had ever said those words during sex and had actually meant it, but right now, there was nothing in the world he told more. 

Carefully, and watching Diane’s face very closely to catch any sign of discomfort, he entered her. Feeling her heat around him felt incredible, but he was using every ounce of self-control to go as slowly as possible and put his pleasure behind Diane’s. But there was no sign of pain or discomfort on Diane’s face because she only felt pleasure and happiness herself. 

It felt terrific, and Diane wasted no thought on Giddeon. She had finally escaped the chains and had never felt so alive as she did right now with the man she loved with all her heart. 

When Will began to move after a while, Diane wrapped her legs back around his hips and began to match his thrusts that gradually went faster and deeper until they had found their rhythm. The only thing on their minds was each other as their lips and hands began to roam their bodies, using what they had learned so far about what they liked to make their first time as perfect as it possibly could be. 

Neither could say, or care for that matter, how long it took them to get close to their orgasm, it didn’t matter, nothing matter right now. What sent Diane over the edge was when Will slipped a hand between their bodies and rubbed his thumb over her clit as he thrusted inside her. Diane had what could easily be the most amazing orgasm of her life; a loud, long moan escaped her mouth as she arched her back and her fingernails dug into Will’s shoulder. 

Having her brought to completion and feeling her tighten even more around him sent Will over the edge shortly after Diane. He held himself deep inside her as he came inside Diane with her name on his lips and his hand holding onto her hip. 

It took them a full minute to return to the here and now, Will had his face pressed against Diane’s neck as they tried to catch their breath. 

“That was...I don’t have words for it...I love you,” Diane murmured, and Will smiled against her skin before pressing a loving kiss first to her neck and then to her lips. 

“There are no words for this, but I love you too, so much,” he whispered back and then pulled out of her reaching somewhere behind him to put the covers around them. Diane cuddled into his side, pillowing her head on his shoulder as Will laid his arm around him. Nothing and no one on this planet could ever ruin this moment or this memory for them. 

* * *

Diane unlocked the door to the house and couldn’t suppress the yawn, it was almost ten pm, and like the day before, she hadn’t had one quiet minute at work because Will had left to meet with a client in Boston on Monday and would only be back tomorrow, which left only her to deal with everything at their firm. 

When Diane walked inside the living room, she expected to find Simone there who had watched Teddy, but it wasn’t Simone. 

“Will!” Diane almost cried out in surprise and threw herself in his waiting arms, “Oh my god, what are you doing here? I thought you wouldn’t be home until tomorrow night?” Diane asked. 

“Hello Di, we were able to finish earlier than we planned, so I took the first plane back here to surprise you,” he said with a smile before sharing a loving kiss. 

“That’s a wonderful surprise! I missed you,” Diane said after they parted, and Will nodded. 

“I missed you too, and Teddy. You should have seen his face when I came home. I had to read him three stories,” Will said, and Diane could imagine the scenario very well, Teddy had missed his father as much as she had.

“He did miss you terribly,” Diane said before kissing Will again. They had never been this long apart since they got together and surely not over such a long distance, so it was understandable that their feelings lit a rapidly growing desire in both of them.

“Not as much as I missed you,” Will said between kisses that turned more heated with each passing second and only fueled their growing desire even more.

“Is he really asleep?” 

“Definitely,” Will quickly answered truthfully; Teddy did sleep like a stone when he last checked on him.

“Perfect.” Diane murmured against his lips before they made their way up the stairs and into their bedroom. Their hands quickly undressed each other, their lips left burning trails on their bodies, and since they hadn’t seen each other for three long days, it made them only yearn for each other even more. Needing to feel, taste, and smell each other. 

“I want you so bad,” Will growled into her ear as he stepped behind Diane, running his hands up her naked body, cupping her breasts, and pulling her against him, so she felt his hard dick against her ass. Diane smiled as she turned in his arms and kissed him as she slowly pushed him to their bed. 

“Me too, I missed you so much,” Diane moaned against his lips as she leaned over him to kiss Will. Diane then reached between them to tease Will a little bit, slowly stroking him, causing Will to rock against her hand, desperate to feel more. But tonight, both couldn’t take much teasing, so Diane showed mercy on him and sat up so she could lower herself on him. Long moans escaped both of them when Will was entirely inside her, and it didn’t take long until Diane began to ride him. 

Will’s right ran over the warm skin of her hip while his left hand cupped her right breast and played with her erect nipple. Diane’s left was placed on Will’s chest to give her more balance while her other laid over Will’s hand on her breast. In little over a month since their first time, they had built up a wonderful sex life, and Diane felt more confident than ever, feeling like she was finally herself again, or at least as close as she could ever be to the person she was before Giddeon had stepped into her life. 

For a while they stayed in that position, Diane began to feel the familiar tingle of an approaching orgasm inside her. But suddenly, Will wrapped his arms around her and flipped them around, so she laid under him, Will was still inside her, but all of a sudden, her world changed. 

The darkness, which had been warm and friendly, suddenly felt impenetrable, almost suffocating. The hands, familiar and warm, now felt cold and possessive, causing a shudder of fear to run through her body, Diane’s heart racing with elation, love, and pleasure, now beat away with agonizing fear. But the worst part was that Diane felt paralyzed again like there was nothing she could do to stop it, and while she knew in the back of her mind that the man on top of her was Will, the man she loved, she heard another voice speaking to her. 

‘ _I am a part of you now’_

Tears well in her eyes, and she felt them run over her cheeks. No, no, no, why? Why was he still in her mind? Why couldn’t she live in peace, why was this happening now? 

“Stop,” Diane said, her voice barely above a whisper, so Will couldn’t understand her, but she needed him to stop, right now, because her demons had caught up with her again, and at the moment, even Will’s touch was unbearable. 

“Stop...please stop, stop,” Diane sobbed, and Will immediately stopped moving and looked at her. His eyes widened in shock, and he quickly pulled out of her. 

“Diane! Oh god, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” Will said as he moved away from Diane, who broke out in sobs, and curled up on the sheets, as all Will could do was watch, feeling terribly helpless. He immediately felt guilt well inside of him, his mind jumping all over the place; how long had Diane asked him to stop? Had he hurt her? 

“I- Diane... I’m sorry, I don’t- I don’t know what to do!” Will said, but Diane only continued to cry, the only thing that came to his mind was covering her, maybe it would help, so she wouldn’t feel so exposed. So Will placed the covers over her and then quickly threw his shirt and boxers back on, maybe with the fabric between them, Diane could bear him holding her. 

Carefully not to startle her and watching out for signs she didn’t want him near her, Will placed his arm around Diane. At first, nothing happened, but then Diane shifted closer to him, and slowly, very slowly, her crying quiet down until she was taking deep and shaky breathes to calm down again. 

“I’m sorry, I- I don’t know what happened…everything was perfect, and then- it just happened-” Diane said, her voice shaky and the last few tears still falling down her face.

“You don’t have to apologize for anything! I’m the one you needs to apologize, I should have noticed something wasn’t alright, and I didn’t, you had to tell me to stop a few times.” Will answered, and Diane could hear he was blaming himself for what happened and that in his eyes, he had hurt her. 

“No, Will, you stopped the moment I told you to, it’s not your fault. You did everything you could,” Diane said truthfully and shifted even closer to him. Once the flashback was gone and the horrible feelings that had come with it slowly died down again, she wanted to be close to Will. Her Will, who was the only one who could protect her from her demons, who was always there when she needed him, the man she loved more than everything. With every moment he held her in his arms, the darkness around and inside her began to fade. It was like the veil of terror Giddeon had thrown over her was pulled off. 

“I just...I don’t understand why it happened now... it’s not the first time we had sex...I thought-” Diane didn’t finish the sentence, but Will knew what she meant. Since nothing liked that had happened when they had sex before, they thought, maybe a little naively so, that it wouldn’t happen at all. 

“I know...but I can’t tell you why it happened now…” Will wanted to tell her it would never happen again, but they both knew it would be a lie. It would happen again. They just didn’t know when or how strong, and that was such a gruesome thing. To know exactly something would happen someday but not able to stop it made them both feel helpless. The only thing that could help them live with that was their love.

“I love you, Diane,” Will then whispered and pressed a kiss down on her hairline. 

“I love you too, Will,” Diane said and buried her face in his chest, feeling his warmth chasing away the coldness, causing her to feel loved and happy again like she felt every time he held her in his arms.

* * *

“Sometimes I still can’t believe what happened in the last months, how much my life changed. We were able to save my firm, I’m in a wonderful relationship with my best friend, who turned out to be the man I truly love, and I’m the mother to a perfect little boy. I’m happy,” Diane said once again, and Dr. Lindstrom nodded. 

“How are you handling the situation that you still don’t know where Giddeon is?” he asked.

“Better... I’m not thinking about it as much as I used to. On some days, it bothers me more and less on others. It helps to get an update now and then from my friends from the FBI, but I want to focus on my life...and I have Teddy to look after.” Diane answered truthfully. 

“Do they have anything new?” 

“No, really, the last thing they know, he was somewhere in Washington near the Canadian border, maybe he is in Canada. They try to find his accomplice. Maybe there is a better chance to find him through his partner.” 

“That seems to be a good idea, I hope they can give you good news.” he said and smiled at her, “Are you doing anything special today?”.

“No, nothing special, maybe some friends coming over for dinner,” Diane answered. They had invited Kalinda, Eli, and Henry and his wife over for dinner to have a nice evening together.

“Sounds good, have a nice evening and we'll see each other in two weeks,” Dr. Lindstrom told her as he and Diane got up, and Diane smiled at him too. 

“Thank you, Goodbye.” with that, she left his practice. On her way home, Diane made a detour to pick up Teddy from his best friend Josh; they were in preschool together and became friends real quick. Diane also considered Josh’s single mother Maryanne a friend, because she was actually one of the few other mothers who didn’t care about their strange little family constellation. Probably because they were the outsiders between most of the stay at home, suburban Moms, though most of them didn't care at all and were friendly, there were some who almost seemed to take a personal offence to the fact that they both were successfully working, not married and in Diane's case not a real mother.

“Hi, Diane,” Maryanne greeted her after she had opened the door. 

“Hey Maryanne, everything alright? I hope Teddy behaved,” Diane answered as she stepped inside the house. 

“Of course, he’s a little angle as always,” her friend answered before turning to the stairs. “Teddy, your mom is here!” she called, and it didn’t take long before the two boys came running down the stairs. 

“Mom!” Teddy jumped into her arms, and Diane pressed a kiss to his cheek. 

“Hi sweetie, did you and Josh have fun?” she asked as she put him down on the ground so he could put on his shoes. 

“Yeah, we build a city, and then we were big monsters knocking everything over!” 

“Right so big!” Josh added to Teddy’s words and held his arms high above his head. 

“Wow, that sounds fun,” Diane said and saw how Maryanne suppressed a laugh. “Okay, thank you for letting him come over. Next time Josh can stay with us,” she said, but the other woman waved it off. 

“It was no big deal, the two of them had fun, that’s the important thing. Say goodbye, Josh.” 

“Bye Teddy!” 

“Bye, Josh!” they both said at the same time and giggled as Diane waved at them. 

“Bye Josh, bye Maryanne,” 

“Goodbye you two!” 

“Bye and thank you!” Teddy said, turning around after they had taken a few steps away from the door.

“No problem! Bye!” once Teddy sat in the car, and Diane drove off, he told her everything they did today as detailed as a four-year-old could. And Diane loved nothing more than to listen to his rambles, happy that he finally had a childhood, a real and happy one at that. 

By the time they had arrived at home, Teddy was finished telling everything that had happened and what they had done. 

“Well, sounds like you had quite the exciting day, sweetie,” Diane said as she unlocked the door, and Teddy nodded with a big smile on his face. Once the door was opened, Teddy hurried inside to greet the dog, like he always did when he got home, ever since the dog became his other best friend in the world. Diane was about to follow him, but then somebody called her name. 

Diane turned around and was more than surprised, to say the least, when she saw Detective Warren. 

“Detective! Hello, how can I help you?” Diane asked as the man in the dark suit stepped closer to her. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to interrupt you, I just...I have a few little questions regarding- the case. Do you have a minute?” He asked, and Diane quickly nodded 

“Of course, come on in, can I get you anything?” Diane asked as they walked inside the apartment. 

“Yeah, a glass of water perhaps?” he asked as he closed the door. 

“Sure, I’ll be back in a second,” Diane told him, and as she made her way to the kitchen, she ruffled Teddy’s hair when she passed him and Hazel on the couch. Of course, her thoughts had immediately turned on Giddeon. What was it that Warren wanted to tell her? Was he close again? Did they find his partner or anything else that might help them find him? But it couldn’t be anything really new regarding Giddeon; if there had been anything, then Agent Blake or Miller would have came by. 

Diane’s phone rang, and she quickly picked up since it was Will, the Detective could wait a moment longer. 

“Hi Will,” 

“Hey Di, everything alright? Are you home yet?” Will asked, and Diane could hear the sounds of the office in the background. 

“Yes and yes, I just came home. You wouldn’t believe me, who just turned up, Detective Warren! He said he wanted to ask me something...maybe they have something on Giddeon’s Partner.” Diane told him, and for a moment, Will stayed silent, thinking probably the same thing she had. 

“Yeah, that sounds like it. I mean, if it was anything urgent regarding Giddeon, the Agents would have called.” He answered. 

“That’s what I thought...well, we’ll know in few minutes. Why did you call?” she asked. 

“I just wanted to tell you I’m as good as finished here, so I think I might be home in an hour. I also wanted to know if I should pick up anything we might still need for dinner or if we have everything,” Will told her, and Diane smiled. 

“No we have everything, but thanks for calling. I can’t wait until you’re home.” 

“Me too, see you later. I love you,” Will said. 

“I love you too!” with that, they both hung up, and Diane walked back inside the living room. 

The glass fell from her hand and shattered on the floor the moment she stepped inside the other room. There were two men in her living room. Detective Warren stood up next to the motionless form of Hazel, a syringe still in his hand, but what made her blood run cold, what caused her heart to stop beating, was the other man. He held Teddy close to him, the boy’s eye widened in fear, while one hand of the man covered his mouth. 

“Hello Diane, did you miss me?” Giddeon said with a bright smile, pressing the gun against Teddy’s temple. 

* * *

Hello guys! 

A lot has happened in this chapter, and I hope you like it. Please tell me in a comment what you think. 

ObviousIy we made some time skips here so at the end of the chapter it a month before a year has passed since Giddeon attacked Diane for the first time, I also hope you can forgive me for what is going to happen. I won’t lie to you; it won’t be pretty. But I promise you there is still a light at the end of the tunnel. Also, this chapter length is an exception!

I hope all of you and your families are doing okay and that every one of you is and stays healthy! 

Love you all!


	13. Chapter 13

“Don’t hurt him! You want me, you can have me, just let him go. He has nothing to do with this; please don’t hurt him,” Diane spoke, her voice steady despite the fear she was feeling, but not for herself, for her son. She would go with him willingly, accepting her fate if only he left Teddy alone because he was innocent. After all, the only thing she couldn’t take was Giddeon hurting Teddy. She had to ignore her own fear, even if her worst nightmare had come true because if she couldn’t, it might mean her son’s death, and that was worse than anything Giddeon could do to her.

“I didn’t quite expect it would be this easy. Where is the fighting, my dear?” he asked, his hand not moving and still pressing the gun against Teddy’s head, Diane could see tears forming in her son’s eyes and wanted nothing more than to protect him, to take him far away, where nobody could find them, where nobody could hurt him. 

“I won’t fight you, but I swear if you dare to hurt him, I will kill you.” the words were out before Diane could stop them or really realize what she was saying, but that didn’t make them any less true. Because if they hurt Teddy, she would stop at nothing to make them pay. Giddeon only chuckled at her words. 

“You know, a few months ago, that was just my plan. To get rid of the boy and that bastard Will, but then I realized where would the fun in that be?” he said and then pushed Teddy into Detective Warren’s arms, who put his own gun to the boys head and hand over his mouth, before more than a frightened wail could escape from Teddy. 

Giddeon walked over to her, but Diane showed no reaction to his presence even though her heart was beating so hard in her chest she was sure he could hear it. Though she couldn’t help but tense when Giddeon stepped behind her and wrapped one arm around her to press her against him while his other held the gun under her chin, forcing Diane to tilt her head back. 

“You have no idea how I longed for this moment to hold you in my arms again, Diane,” Giddeon told her quietly, and Diane could feel him bury his face in her hair and inhaling. 

“Why are you doing this?” Diane asked.

“Oh, you know why I’m doing this-” 

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Diane interrupted Giddeon, who hadn’t seen that her eyes were fixed on the man who currently threatened her son and helped her personal demon to get to her again, a man whom she thought was a friend, who supposedly had tried to help her. 

“He raped and killed so many innocent women; he killed your partner. Why are you helping him? Why?” Diane said to the Detective, who smiled. 

“I helped him way before that. After all, we are best friends since kindergarten.” Warren answered, and Diane closed her eyes as she fully understood the meaning of his words. Giddeon had never disappeared from her life for one day. There had always been the connection through Warren, who gifted him with a front seat into her life, who could tell Giddeon everything they were doing to catch him. 

Even after they found Detective Sheridan’s warning, he had still given Giddeon everything they knew; that was why they were never able to catch him. Warren had warned his friend every time they got too close to him. Was that what the woman had found out? That her own partner, the man she had worked with for years, was actually the best friend and partner of a sociopathic rapist. Then it hit her.

“Oh my god...it was you, wasn’t it? You murdered Sheridan because she found out you were Giddeon’s partner.” Diane said and saw how Warren made an impressed face. 

“You’re not as stupid as I thought you were, finally connected the dots.” 

“See I’m not as bad as you think,” Giddeon then said and forced Diane to walk towards Warren and Teddy. “But the catching up is done now; we have quite a busy schedule, you understand, my dear?” he added, and Diane was sure he would take her upstairs. He would rape her and probably kill her like he had killed all those other women in and outside of the country. 

“Let me say goodbye to him, please, just let me say goodbye.” Diane quickly said, but Giddeon only laughed. He then put his gun away and showed Diane the syringe with the clear liquid inside. 

“There is no need to say goodbye darling, your little boy will come with us. We don’t want him to miss all the fun!” 

That was when she started struggling because she couldn’t possibly let them take Teddy with them. 

“No! No! Don’t do this, please! Leave him alone! He has nothing to do with this!” she cried as she tried in vain to stop the unavoidable, and before long, Giddeon had injected her what ever was inside the syringe. Diane awaited with rising panic the feeling of losing control of her body, but this wasn’t the same drug. This time she felt her consciousness slip away with each second. 

“You’re wrong, you took him in, you made him a part of this and my special way to control you, Darling.” Giddeon said, but Diane couldn’t answer anymore. The last thing she saw was the face of her son with tears streaming down his cheeks before her world was drowned in darkness.

* * *

“Alright, I’m heading home now, and don’t call me until it’s life or death, okay? I mean it.” Will said as he left his office to go home when he had finally finished the paperwork for today. 

“Of course, Goodbye, Mr. Gardner have a nice evening,” his assistant said with a smile, and when he waited for an elevator, Kalinda stepped next to him. 

“Hey can you give me a ride?” she asked with a grin, and Will nodded.

“Sure.” he said as the elevator stopped, and they got inside. 

“Thanks for the invitation, by the way. It’s been ages since we spent time together outside of the office.” she said, and Will nodded. Kalinda was right, they used to get drinks together quite regularly, but since he got together with Diane and then taking Teddy in, it had been a long time indeed. He kinda missed talking to Kalinda. 

“You’re right...and we have to make sure we change that.” Will said, “Remember when I told you I’m a person that feels nothing? That I just act like I do?...I don’t feel that way anymore...when Diane and I got together that changed…I changed, and even more so with Teddy.” Will said, and Kalinda nodded. 

“I noticed you did...and you don’t know how happy it makes me to see the two of you finally happy. You deserve each other, and while the circumstances under which you got together and took Teddy in are horrible, you did the best, and you turned the life of that little boy around and actually gave him a chance at a happy life, you gave him a family.” 

“Thanks, Kalinda; it means a lot coming from you...I also-” at that moment, his phone rang, damn it if this was somebody upstairs, he would ride the elevator right back up and rip some heads off. But on the display stood another name. “Sorry, I have to take that,” Will said, and Kalinda nodded. 

“Agent Blake? What can I do for you?” he asked, not trying to hide the surprise in his voice. 

“Will is Diane with you?” the Agents said without another word. 

“What? Er, no, she’s home. What’s going on?” instantly, Will grew worried because he didn’t like the tone of the Agent at all, something was going on, something serious. 

“Fuck, turn left, Miller!” the Agent almost yelled at her partner before addressing Will again, “Will, where are you?” 

“I’m on the parking level of our firm on my way home, Agent. What the hell is going on?” Will now demanded to know. 

“We know who Giddeon’s partner is! It’s Detective Warren! He’s been Giddeon’s partner the whole time, but we can’t get a hold of Diane. She’s not answering any phone calls and- and the Agents stationed at your home don’t respond either.” the female Agent explained. His blood turned cold, and his heart stopped beating. No, please, god no, don’t let this happen. 

“Oh my god... he’s at our home,” Will whispered, staring at the elevator doors without really seeing them. In his mind, he saw the man they had thought to be helping them, at his home, with Giddeon. Though not understanding what exactly was going on, Kalinda knew something incredible bad had happened and fixed Will his a worried look.

“What did you say?” the Agent asked. 

“He’s at our home! Diane called me when she got home almost an hour ago! Detective Warren was there! He’s already at our home- Diane! Diane and Teddy are alone there!” Will almost yelled, and as soon as the doors to the elevator opened, he rushed out and ran towards his car, closely followed by Kalinda. 

“Will, we’re almost there! We’ll get him!” Agent Blake called over the phone, but Will already hung up as he and Kalinda sprinted towards his car. 

“Will! What happened?” 

“Warren is Giddeon’s partner! They’re in our house!” was all he answered, and when they were at his car, Kalinda finally caught up and stopped him, incurring his wrath. “Fuck off, Kalinda!”

“Do you want to drive into another car? Or a building? You’ll get yourself killed! I’ll drive!” Kalinda said and snatched the keys out of his hand, and Will wanted to argue, but all that would do was cost them time, so he hurried around the car and got inside on the passenger side. Only seconds later, Kalinda drove the car out of the parking garage with screaming wheels. Beside her, Will was a nerve wreck, his left leg was jumping up and down, and his right was pulling at his hair while every thought in his mind was focus on Diane and Teddy. 

“Will, I know-” 

“You don’t! You don’t fucking know Kalinda, so don’t try to tell me otherwise! Who knows what they did to Diane and Teddy! That’s my family we’re talking about.” Will yelled at her. He didn’t even care that Kalinda was trying to help him, right now, he only cared about Diane and Teddy. He had never been this scared in his life, he thought he was frightened when Giddeon attacked Diane and then appeared in the Bar a second time, but it was nothing compared to right now. 

“I can’t lose them, Kalinda...I can’t, please,” Will begged, he was close to tears. What would he do if they arrived at his home and Diane and Teddy were dead? His mind tortured him with images of their dead bodies and everything Diane had to endure before they murdered her.

“Maybe we won’t be too late. Blake and the others are on their way too,” Kalinda said, not able to lie to him and tell him everything would be okay because they both knew that wouldn’t be the case, not with Giddeon involved. And of course, Kalinda was also worried about Diane and Teddy; after Will she was probably the person who cared most about them, and the thought that even one of them could be hurt or worse was barely bearable.

Every minute felt like an eternity. Then they drove into their street, and in front of their house stood three police cars and two FBI SUV’s. Kalinda hadn’t even stopped the car entirely before Will had already opened the door and sprinted towards the house. He collided with a Cop who tried to hold him back. 

“Let go of me, I live here! That’s my home! Let me go!” Will screamed as he tried to fight off the cop who tried to talk him down, but Will wasn’t hearing any of it. But his screaming caused Agent Blake to come look at what was going on and hurry towards the scene where Will fought with two cops now while Kalinda tried to break up the fight.

“Let him go, Officers, let him go!” Blake called as she hurried towards them, and the moment they let go of Will, he stumbled towards her Kalinda not far behind.

“Where are Diane and Teddy? What happened? Are they okay?” Will asked as he grabbed the shoulders of the Agent shaking her. 

“Will-” she started, and Will ignored the somber look on her face and the mix of worry and frustration in her voice because he couldn’t handle what that might mean. 

“Where is my family, Blake? Are they okay?” he screamed at her face, his eyes wide in panic. 

“We don’t know! They are gone, Diane and Teddy are gone. They took them with them.” the Agent said and watched as Will’s entire world collapsed before her eyes and how she had to hold him up with Kalinda’s help when his knees gave out for a second. 

“We sent a nationwide alert with their pictures, every police station knows we’re looking for them, the FBI is also looking for them everywhere. We will find the Will. There is nowhere they can go!” 

They were gone, Diane and Teddy were gone, Giddeon had taken the two people who meant the world to him, who he loved more than anything else, away from him. He had taken Diane and Teddy to who knows where, if they were still alive. An Abyss had opened beneath Will’s feet and swallowed him whole as he was falling; blood was rushing in his ears as his heart was beating fast. 

“No...no, you won’t,” Will said quietly and felt tears burning in his eyes “You didn’t find him in almost a year. You won’t find him now.” he pushed the two women away and stumbled a few steps towards his home before he fell to his knees with a scream before breaking down in sobs. 

* * *

Darkness. When Diane slowly regained her consciousness, she wasn’t sure if the darkness around him was an aftereffect of the drug Giddeon gave her or if her surroundings were of such intense darkness, probably both. Diane closed her eyes again as there was nothing to see anyway, then she tried to move, but all the feeling from her extremities was gone, it felt like she was floating in water. Where was she? 

There was a strange sound, but even her ears had stopped functioning, and whatever it was, it sounded like her ears were plugged with cotton, and the person was speaking very quietly. The air was hot and stifling, so Diane tried to breathe in through her mouth only to realize she was gagged. He had pushed some sort of cloth in her mouth and then taped her mouth shut.

Diane tried her best not to panic right now. Who knew how much air was left where ever she was. What has he done? What was he planning to do? What had he done to Teddy? At the thought of her son, she felt her heart clench up in pain, he had to be alright, he had to be okay. She couldn’t believe otherwise. The thought alone was too painful. She begged where ever Teddy was that he was okay. 

She regained more and more of her consciousness with every passing moment, it was like she was in a tub, and the water was slowly draining. With every second, she felt more and more of her body, her own weight pulling her down. Diane felt that she was only in her underwear and her feet and hands were bound together, but that was something she expected. She had to know where she was and tried to explore more of her prison. 

It turned out there wasn’t much to explore. Diane tried to move her bent legs but wasn’t able to; with great effort she tried to roll over but found herself unable to do so due to the size of the place she was held. Then again, it didn’t feel like walls, though solid, it felt like they were covered in some rough cloth or something like that. No matter what she did, Diane felt the walls as soon as she moved, that bastard held her in a tiny space. ‘Damn it, Diane, focus’ she yelled in her mind that was still somewhat foggy. 

She was held in something that had barely enough space for her, there was no changing that, but where the hell was she? As Diane was also robbed of her eyesight, the only thing left was her hearing. She willed her mind to pay attention, and slowly her hearing got better. Was that traffic? Diane definitely heard cars and faint music? But only when she realized that the ground below her was vibrating and that her prison was slightly moving every now and then did she realize where she was. A car trunk. 

Giddeon tied and gagged her before he fucking threw her in the trunk and took her to who knows where. No, no, no, she didn’t want it to end this way no, this was not fair, she had fought so hard to get her life back, and now Giddeon was back and had abducted her and Teddy. Why couldn’t she live in peace? Diane screamed against her gag and thrashed around. She hit her hands against the trunk lid and the back of the seats with all her might. 

Shortly later, Diane felt the car slow down and was shaken when Giddeon pulled over. Diane stopped moving when she heard the car door slam shut, and only a moment later, the trunk was opened, and even though the light wasn’t very bright, it must be evening already, Diane had to close her eyes. 

“You finally woke up, Darling,” Giddeon said, and since Diane couldn’t see, she wasn’t prepared for his hands grabbing her and pulling her from the trunk, and throwing her on the grass below. Instinctively she tried to crawl away even though she knew it was in vain, and then he had already grabbed her hands and dragged her away. 

“You want to get away? Huh, Darling? Come on, I’ll help you,” Giddeon said, and Diane trashed around like a fish on land trying to fight him off, but it was of no use and when her eyes had finally accustomed to the light, she saw he dragged her into a Forest. Soon enough, he dragged her over the forest ground, and small branches and stones scratched her skin, and Diane screamed again. 

Suddenly Giddeon stopped and sat over her, his knees on either side of her body, and slapped her hard. Giddeon then grabbed her chin and pushed her head into the ground. “What? You wanted to get away! So get away, come one crawl away, you little whore, and I swear I’ll make you watch how I wring that boy’s neck! He’s in the car you want me to get him?” he spat at her, and Diane shook her head frantically. 

“You will fucking obey me! Do you understand? When I put you back in the trunk, you won’t scream or kick. If I hear one more sound from you, the boy will be dead! Do you understand me?” he asked, and Diane nodded quickly. She wouldn’t risk him hurt Teddy; she would rather die than have him hurt her son. 

“Good girl,” he got up and dragged her back to the car by her hands, it was painful, but Diane bit her tongue, scared that even one sound was enough to anger him, and she didn’t want him to hurt Teddy or her anymore. 

When he paused to make sure that nobody was near who could see them, she heard pounding on glass. Diane craned her neck to look at the car, tears well in her eyes when she saw a crying Teddy pound on the car window and cried out for her, but she was unable to get to him, to comfort him. She couldn’t tell him that everything would be alright because she didn’t know if anything would be okay ever again. Her own sole comfort was, that at least Teddy looked like he was physically OK.

“We still have a long way ahead of us, Darling, a really long way, so you better be good, baby,” he leaned down, and Diane flinched back. She saw anger flash over his face, and in the next second his fist crashed into her face. The pain sent tears to her eyes, and she couldn't suppress a painful groan, Diane felt blood run from her nose, but Giddeon had already grabbed her face and pulled her close to his own. 

“You better don’t flinch away again!” he hissed and pressed a kiss to her forehead, and this time Diane did as she was told and let it happen. “You’re mine now. The sooner you accept that the easier your life is going to be.” Giddeon said before he closed the trunk and drowned her world in darkness again. 

She didn’t know how long they were driving. There was no indication of time or anything. They could be driving for hours or a few minutes, Diane had no idea. Giddeon had even turned the volume of the radio down, so there was no sound reaching her. Her world consisted of darkness and the constant rattling of the tires and roaring of the engine. 

Then her thoughts turned to Will and her friends, and her heart bled at the thought that she might never see Will again. Had she ever told him how much she loved him? Why the hell had it taken them so long to realize their feelings for each other? They could have had years together. And now, after only seven months, everything might be over? Had she ever told him that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him? Why hadn’t she told him? God how much she regretted this now. Tears streamed down Diane’s face, but she desperately kept from sobbing out loud in fear she would incur Giddeon's wrath upon her again. 

Diane forced herself to calm down again; after all, she was still gagged, and she didn’t want to suffocate on her own tears. So she focused her mind on Will and their friends again. What were they doing right now? What were they doing to find them? Was there even anything that might help them find them? Or were there no leads left like the other times Giddeon had appeared in her life? Where was Warren? He was probably doing everything he could to prevent them from finding them. 

Suddenly Diane was shaken through when Giddeon slowed down. She realized he was pulling over again and wondered why? Then she heard a car door slam shut, but it sounded like it was coming from another car. What was going on? Should she risk screaming or hitting against the trunk? Diane didn’t move one muscle and listened for voices. She could hear someone talking, and if she wasn’t mistaking it was Giddeon talking to someone, the question was if the person he was talking to was a friend or not.

A moment later, Diane flinched when a gunshot rang through the silence of her prison, what had happened? She could hear Teddy crying, had something happened to him? Despite what he had told her, Diane pounded her hands on the trunk lid, and she didn’t have to wait long. When Gideon opened the trunk, she could see his face grotesquely illuminated by the flashes of blue and red from the police car in the night. Due to them she was also able to make out the droplets of blood on the left side of his face. 

“What did I tell you?” he yelled at her and pointed his gun to her forehead. He then pulled her halfway out of the trunk and bent her over the side of the car so she could see the young police officer on the street. Like with Detective Sheridan, the bullet hadn’t left much of the back of his head. He looked awfully young, and Diane closed her eyes and shook her head to answer Giddeon’s question. “This is your last chance, damn it, Diane, stop fighting this!” he growled and threw her back in the trunk. 

He wanted to close the trunk again, but Diane held her hands up, nodding towards the backseat, hoping he understood she wanted to know if Teddy was alright. “The boy is doing fine, and if you want it to stay this way, I suggest you do what I say and keep quiet!” Gideon said and closed the trunk again. Diane could still hear Teddy crying and wished she could be with him now, hold him in her arms and protect him, tell him everything would be alright, even if it was a lie.

Due to the darkness and the distance, Diane hadn’t even realized that the police car and the dead officer’s uniform were not from the United States but from Canada. Giddeon had actually taken her out of the country, there was nobody in Canada looking for him, or them for that matter. Nobody knew here that he had abducted them.

She wasn’t sure how long they were driving. Diane had lost count of how many times her arms and legs had gone to sleep, she was freezing, and everything was hurting due to her cramped position in the trunk. Giddeon had only allowed her to get out shortly to pee once before dawn, and she was sure it was hours ago. He hadn’t given her anything to drink or eat, and while the hunger was manageable, the thirst wasn’t, and she shuddered at the thought of what he could make her do in exchange for water.

Diane didn’t react when the car stopped this time, there was no point in it anyway. After a few minutes, the trunk opened, and Diane began to shiver when ice-cold wind mixed with rain hit her, and despite the rainy weather, it was still bright enough to blind Diane again. “Don’t worry, you can warm up inside,” Giddeon said as he lifted her out of the trunk, but Diane’s legs were of no use and gave out under her the moment she tried to put some weight on them, causing Giddeon to hold her up. 

“Easy darling, I’ve got you.” he said with a chuckle, and Diane had to force herself not to fight his touch. She blinked her eyes open, trying to make out where she was, but all she could make out at first were trees, and the air smelled like a forest too. Where had he taken her?

“You see? It took me months to find and prepare this place, so it’s ready for you, Darling! Welcome home.” he grabbed her chin again and made her look at the small house. It might have looked warm and inviting under every other circumstance, a small romantic getaway, but to Diane it was her personal horror house because she knew what was coming for her inside these walls. A life as his prisoner. 

Once again, he dragged her inside, Diane was only stumbling along on the gravel, he opened the door to a living and dining room combination she could make out the kitchen at the other end, to their right about halfway into the room was a hallway. But Giddeon walked past it and towards a lonely door on the wall to their right. It had a heavy lock on it, and Diane knew this was where she would be held captive, but when he opened the door, and she saw the stairs leading down into the darkness, Diane began to struggle. 

“Stop it! Did you think you would simply get to be with me? You’re mine now, Diane, but you have to earn your place. Show me you can be a good girl, and you can have everything you want.” he growled in her ear before he dragged her down the stairs by her hands and her own weight pulling at her arms made her scream in pain against the gag. 

After the stairs, Diane was dragged over cold stone towards a wall and felt how he put an actual shackle around her ankle before cutting the ropes that had bound her legs and hands. Giddeon also ripped the tape from over her mouth, causing Diane to groan in pain before he pulled what turned out to be one of her own panties from her mouth. Once the piece was removed, Diane gagged, and dry heaved, but nothing was there to throw up.

“Why couldn’t you...just kill me?” Diane rasped, laying on the cold floor shaking and simply exhausted. 

“Because I love you and I want you...and until you want that too, you’re going to stay here. But I promise you, you’ll get there, I’ll break you, Honey, sooner or later, and I can’t wait for the day we’re going to be a family. You, me, the boy, and maybe our own baby.” Gideon told her with a smile and left her after pressing a kiss to her unresponsive lips. 

Now Diane couldn’t hold back the sobbing, why was this happening. God, they had to come and find them before it was too late, she didn’t know how long she could endure this. 

‘ _Please Will, you have to find us’_

* * *

Hello, my lovely readers! 

When you read this, you know that what Diane, and sometimes Teddy, have to go through isn’t over yet. What Giddeon the great, big asshole (he’s my character, did I just insult myself?) has planned for them has barely begun, and you have to be strong for a little while longer.

Thank you very much for the wonderful comments on the last chapter, I tried my best to get this out to you as fast as possible and hope you like it despite the dark theme. I try my best to update as soon as possible! Stay healthy! Love you all!


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